Jihoon sits on the edge of a building. He’s pretty high up from the streets below, but that doesn’t faze him, not really. He was walking to the Seventeen practice room when he spotted a daisy lying around, so he decided to pick it up. It’s such a small fragile thing, such a lovely flower, and why someone would choose to leave it lying around is beyond him. It’s such a sad thing to do really.  He walks up the stairs to the roof of the building and shuts the door behind him. It’s too early for anyone to be in the building; they’re probably all sleeping or whatnot. It’ll probably be long before his team friends he’s gone; having thirteen members would make it pretty hard for someone to spot his disappearance. It’s quiet up here, but he knows the same cannot be said for the bustling streets down below. It’s such a lovely view from up here. Jihoon likes the quiet, he likes being alone from time to time, and it helps to think about things, private matters. As Jihoon sits on the roof of the building, he goes back to staring at the beautiful piece of nature he has in his grasp. A daisy is a symbol of love and as luck would have it (something he feels like he’s said an awful lot before) it reminds him of the person he loves. It reminds him of Seungcheol.

Seungcheol in all his handsomeness and talent will be the end of him, Jihoon knows it. He’d like to say that Seungcheol feels the same, but from the likes of it, he’s not so sure. Unrequited love they call it. It’s such a painful feeling, so grueling to feel, but well he feels it and god does it hurt. It’s not a physical feeling, but it just well might be. The world works in funny ways, you either love someone who loves you too, or you end up loving someone who was never really yours, scary, right? But it’s true. How can he love when love’s been taken from him? That’s a question he still has yet answer. He looks at the white petals as he laughs to himself. He’s seen this is too many movies and it is so cliché, but here he finds himself bringing his fingers to a single petal.

He loves me he says mentally as he plucks a single petal from the daisy. He thinks to himself, does Seungcheol love him the way he loves him?

He loves me not, or is Jihoon another Dongsaeng that Seungcheol has to take care of? Those are the questions that enter his brain as he plucks the petals.

He loves me

He loves me not

He loves me

He loves me not

Jihoon stops looking at the petals remaining on the flower as he sees the other petals swirl in the air. He doesn’t want to see what he’ll end up with. He’d like to think that he’s embraced himself for the inevitable truth, but is anyone really ready for anything?

He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, and he repeats those phrases as if it’s a mantra. He decides to finally look down at the daisy when he realizes that there’s only one petal left, and there’s one last phrase before the daisy is just another torn up flower. As he thought, he’s not ready for it, but the time has come.

He loves me not