Chapter 04
Wish You'd Never Grow Up
Jimin instantly laid down on his bed after he threw his bag to the side. They will have dance practice today but the other members hasn't arrived at the dorm yet so he and Jungkook will have some extra rest time. He stared at the ceiling above him. The song played during the ride is still fresh in his mind.
Then he sat up and rummaged his bag. He pulled out the hoodie he wore last night and searched for the photo he took from the album. He wanted to keep at least one kiddie picture of him and his sister and have it near him. Remembering the old times really makes him happy, so why not?
He laid the photo down gently on his bed. He went out of his room and came back with a blue ink pen, a new piece of white A4 paper and a book with hard cover. He was going to write something for his sister and he has to write it now or else he will forget what to write.
Jimin laid on his stomach on the bed and reached for his phone. He looked up the lyrics of the song then he picked up the pen.
~
To my cutie sister, Jihye.
Do you know that you are very precious to me? I know we always fight and such, but that's that. We never take it to the heart, and the fights never lessen our appreciation towards each other.
Honestly, I actually find you annoying when we were little. Because everytime I played with you, you always ended up crying and then later I got scolded by dad. If I won't play with you, you will cry too! Do you know how annoying it was? Like, when will I play with my friends if you kept bugging to come along, with mom not allowing you to follow me. In the end, I didn't go out. I played doll house with you instead. Urgh.
Sometimes I wish I had a little brother instead of sister. I frequently asked myself, when will I get rid of you, when will I move out from the house, away from you. The moment I got to moved in to the dorm with the others, I can't really describe how happy I was. Yas, no more you and your cries.
But somehow, it feels emptier than ever when I realised there's no you to poke fun at, no you to order around doing these and that. Push aside your cry, we have done a lot of fun things together. Everything seems fun with you because you will laugh even at my silly jokes, even when you don't understand it.
Now, whenever I was stressed after practice, with the constant pressure from everyone, to deal with other's anger, I wish I could go home and rest and not think about it. I wish life is just about poking fun at you and make you cry and then feel satisfied about it. But nope. This is what I asked for. To move out, to have my life free from home.
Well, I'm sorry.
Do you know what I felt when I opened the album full of our photos? Nostalgic. As I keep flipping the pages, I noticed you became taller and taller. And more mature. That's when I realised you have grown up. My sister has grown up. There's no more crying because of silly things anymore. When I saw you in high school uniform yesterday, I noticed how different you are. It's sad that I didn't get to see you entering high school but I promised I will make it to your graduation!
So... I have some, I don't know what to call it. Poems? Nah, not that. Quotes? Not that either. I will just say some parts of a song that I modified a little bit. If that's what it can be called.
Your little hand's wrapped around my finger
And it's so quiet in the world tonight
And it's so quiet in the world tonight
I don't exactly remember how it felt when your chubby baby fingers held my hand. But I do remember how you held my hand when we were going to cross the street, to buy the ice cream you loved so much at the stall across.
Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming
So I tuck you in, turn on your favorite night light
When you had nightmares, you always came running to my room because it was the nearest to your bedroom. You will cry then I will let you sleep on my bed while I sleep on the floor. There's also times when the electricity went out at night or when there's thunder at night, you would yell in your room like there's no tomorrow so I had to run there and sing you to sleep. Remember? I hope you do.
To you everything's funny, you got nothing to regret
I'd give all I have, honey
If you could stay like that
I'd give all I have, honey
If you could stay like that
I wish we could just stay laughing at our neighbours' old car, stay amused at everything that went passed us in theme parks. Not bothered by life problems.
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple
I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart
And no one will desert you
Just try to never grow up, never grow up
- March 21, 2016
Jimin smiled at the words he wrote. He folded the paper neatly then he stared at it. 'When will I give this to her?' He decided to give it personally to her when he gets a vacation instead of posting it through the mail. He puts the letter in his personal drawer and closed it with a wide grin.
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