This is inspired by the song Blind by TRAX. It actually has a deep meaning and I hope this story fits it. I want to make it a sad ending but...I just can't TT^TT

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Even if you lean your head against me and blankly look at me, you don't know...
I spread my arms and say that it feels so cool but you still don't know...

I’ve always been by your side. Being protecting you from everyone or everything that hurts you. I try to keep you safe and I just love doing it. That time, we were still a child. We never knew something that everyone called ‘love’ and instead just calls it ‘friendship’. But…the two are actually the same. There’s no friendship without love.

We play together, laugh together, cry together, and grew up together. This feeling…just grew without me nor you noticing. And… I never knew what that feeling was. It was a very warm feeling. My chest…feels so warm with you beside me. I feel comfortable with you beside me. Why? What is this?

We’ve grown up….new environment, new atmosphere, new friends…You look so happy when we’re playing together with all of them. Your smile…yes, your smile…just seeing it makes my heart in ease. I’ve been addicted to that smile. But your tears…is something I hate to see. That’s why I’ve tried to protect you. I don’t like your crying face…

I am invisible but I am standing in front of you...

But your eyes look past me...

I’ve always stay beside you. But still, I never knew the true shape of this strange feeling. When you’re far, the thing I always think about is just you. That face, that hair, that smile… I want to be by your side always. I’m…addicted to you.

Oh…

I Know…

This….

Is “love”…

But…Do you feel the same way? I’ve tried to be closer to you. More….and more…but you never notice my feeling and I’m just too scared to tell my feelings for you. Because….we’re not allowed to love each other. We’re not. We’re not meant for each other…I knew it. You’re not mine.

But…

If I can break that destiny….then I would pray that you love me….for now…being beside you as best friends is enough for me. Even though it hurts my heart, I’ll stay beside you, Soyeon…

Just once, just once, please look for me...

The more you feel, the more you feel...

I become more and more invisible...

At the end of my desperate prayers...

If only you will find me so that I can have you in my arms...

Days passed, Month passed, Seasons passed…I’ve always stay by your side. I still love that smile of yours. But…deep inside my heart I still with that you notice that my loyalty to you all this time….is because I love you. As each day with you passed, this feelings is piling up. I still try hard to fight it so that it won’t slip out and just get out of control. But…you always did things that almost makes me can’t hold it anymore. It makes me harder to keep this feeling when you approach me innocently without noticing this feeling. Can I…hold it?

But…I noticed something. You’ve become closer to someone…a boy. That happy smile you only show to me…you always show it to him and I don’t like it. Don’t get close to him! I…My heart…is aching. My chest filled with annoyance and anger. Is this….Jealousy?

Notice me…please, notice my feelings for you. I…I don’t want you to be someone else’s. You’re mine. We’ve been together for so long, how could you not notice my feelings? Please…Be mine. I…I’ll swear to protect you for the rest of my life. This pain…I can’t bear it.

If only…I could say those words…

My heart is cracked, cut and broken...

At the end of a rough day...

When I am broken into pieces, you would be able to see me...

I noticed that you and he somehow had a special relation. You often go out with him and now spend more time with him rather than with me. So….you “love” him. I know. I know I’ll never had the chance to be with you and you…will never be mine. I know it…but…it still hurts so much. It hurts.

I ask you about your relationship with him but you’ll just answer, “we’re just best friends…”

You’re lying…

Your face…your expression…I know that you’re lying. I just give a fake laugh so that you won’t notice me. But I’m lying too…I lie to myself. I told myself that I’m not hurt. But I’m hurt…I…Still want you. Should I…tell you my true feelings? But it means that… Oh…I don’t know…

The sky turns grey. The wind’s cold. We were walking through the path we usually pass through together when going home. It has been a long time I didn’t walk side by side with you since you’re….close with that boy. It’s…so nostalgic. We met when we’re still young and now…We’ve grown up so much…and you just keep getting beautiful. So beautiful…

“Jiyeon-ah…” You called

“Yes?”

“What do you think about Seungho?”

No…don’t ask me that!

“You know…yesterday…he…asked me out. What do you think I should-“

“NO!” I cut

You can't see so I love you like this...

Even your fingerprints in the corner...

I strongly engrave them into me...

My blackened and bruised heart-...

I take it out and show it to you...

But you just say that looks pitch-black outside...

“Jiyeon-ah?” You look confused

“Don’t….Please…” I begged…The overflowing feelings that I’ve hold on up to now…is slowly coming out

“w-what’s wrong?”

Suddenly, my body moves on its own and pulls her in my arms. I rest my chin on her shoulder. My arms tightly hold her. She’s so warm and….small. I never knew she was so small like this. I…don’t want to let you go.

“Soyeon, I….I love you. Up to know, I’ve been hiding my true feelings to you! I…”

Wait…What did I just say…

            “I….I…” I let her off my arms. I was shocked myself of what I just said. I can feel my face burnt.

            “Jiyeon-ah…you…”

            I ran away. Ran away as far as I could. Nowhere. I don’t know where. My mind just gone blank. I…what did I just say. How can I do that and say those words. She’ll hate me. There’s no way she could answer back my feelings. She’s….not meant to be mine. No…

            I run and without noticing, I was on the middle of the street. A car was rushing and then…I can’t feel a thing…

You can't see so you say that looks pitch-black outside...

You just endlessly look outside the window...

            It’s so bright…I open my eyes slowly. I see the ceiling. Where am I? I look to my right side, I feel a presence. A girl…brunette with long hair looking at me with a worried face. But… She’s…

            “Jiyeon-ah?! You’re awake?”

            She come close to me. I can see her eyes are swollen. Is she…been crying? Is it because of me. But…Strange…this girl…

            “I…I’m so sorry I-“

            “Who are you?” I said

            Her face suddenly goes in shock. I can’t remember a thing. I’m…Jiyeon. That’s the only thing I knew. But…who’s this girl? Do I knew her? But…she’s seem kind of a familiar.

            “Jiyeon-ah…” She calls me again. Tears runs down her cheek. “I’m sorry!” and suddenly she embrace me…

            Feels so warm…But….Who’s she…?

            “I’m sorry…I should’ve tell you too….I….I love you too…”

            What? What’s she talking about? It’s strange…so strange…but…My heart…I want to know you more. I…Love you too… I want to remember you. Who you were. Who am I…what’re we…your name…you’re…

            “Me too….So…yeon…”