Chanyeol knows it’s been a long time since he fell in love with Byun Baekhyun. It’s been so long that Chanyeol can’t pinpoint when their lives started to meld, when gradually two separate houses became one, two separate beds, two separate hearts. He tosses and turns in bed now, chilly. He’s not used to sleeping alone—though Chanyeol’s tall, their luxurious king size mattress feels much too big without him. He consoles himself that Baekhyun’s business trip is only for a week, but truthfully, he missed him from the hour he left.

     Baekhyun knows it’s been a long time since he fell in love with Park Chanyeol. It’s been so long that Baekhyun can’t remember when it happened at all—one minute he’d had his high school senior year science fair board and models knocked to the ground by some clumsy dork--award winning to broken glass and half-glued paper, and the next, he was working his dream job as an architect and living in the same house as that same clumsy dork. He collapses now onto the bed of the hotel he’s staying at, everything feeling oddly quiet without Chanyeol banging around on the drums or playing one of his seventeen billion guitars or trying to get Baekhyun in the mood or beatboxing or having an existential crisis. Baekhyun chuckles to himself. He misses the small things the most.

     Baekhyun watches School of Rock on Netflix. It’s probably the fifty millionth time he’s seen it, it being Chanyeol’s favorite movie of all time, but he admits he doesn’t get tired of it either. The things Chanyeol likes Baekhyun generally likes too, aside from that huge argument they’d had in the freshman year of college over Jason Mraz and Michael Bublé. Baekhyun took Chanyeol out to see Kingsman last weekend for their anniversary, and though it was a thoroughly unromantic movie, they both had a great time. Chanyeol is always the life of the party. Baekhyun cracks up remembering their college senior week (debatably the best week of his life) where Chanyeol dramatically lost the beer pong championship finals and hurled himself into the ocean at one in the morning in distress (Baekhyun had to rescue him, Chanyeol being drunk and Baekhyun fearing for his safety.) It was almost couple bonding week for the two of them. They spent the long nights on the balcony of the hotel room, talking about everything anyone could ever think to talk about.

Baekhyun can read Chanyeol like a book now, seamlessly, and though Chanyeol’s not as good as verbalizing things as Baekhyun is, Baekhyun knows he can do it as well. The two are so tightly knit that even the unspoken things go noticed, like the time Chanyeol caught the glimmer of discomfort in Baekhyun’s eye at his friend’s party and quietly (and gracefully) left early, despite Baekhyun’s protests. Like the time Baekhyun saw Chanyeol longingly eyeing one of the fancier acoustic guitars in the shop as he was getting his strings repaired, and how Baekhyun whispered to the cashier to cancel the fix and to charge Baekhyun for that one instead (he flinched at the $3,000 price tag, but handed his card over anyway) and surprised Chanyeol with an early birthday present. Chanyeol’s face was priceless when he realized the instrument in the case was not the one he’d sent in for repair, and Baekhyun’s only thought was that he wanted to make Chanyeol that happy forever.

     Chanyeol thinks he’ll compose a song for Baekhyun when he gets back. He knows it’s stupid that he can barely survive without his boyfriend for a single week. He sits at the piano, putting down some chords—but it sounds too strong, too loud. He can’t play like Baekhyun can. He switches to the guitar.

     His thoughts stray almost immediately. He’d asked Baekhyun out on a winter day, when the snow was falling thick over the college campus. Baekhyun’s rosy cheeks had gotten even redder and he’d smiled, shyly, nodding yes before hiding his face with his hands. Jongin had let out a whooping yell and tacked Chanyeol into a hug as Sehun groaned, pulling out his wallet and passing an elated Jongin a hundred bucks. Yifan elbowed him so ferociously Chanyeol nearly bruised, and Kyungsoo, who generally looked unamused with any sort of antic Baekhyun or Chanyeol pulled, pulled one of his rare smiles and offered the two of them congratulations.

     Their first kiss was on the doorstep of Chanyeol’s apartment. Chanyeol had known Baekhyun to be a bit shy about romance and such, but it was he who leaned in first, lips pressing against Chanyeol’s quickly before an “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” Chanyeol had stood there, back pressed against the wall, shocked, for about ten minutes until Sehun opened the door (“get in, you stupid er, it’s like negative two degrees outside.”)

     Their first time was after freshman graduation. Baekhyun had still had his mortarboard half on when Chanyeol laid him on the bed in his apartment, body against body, tearing off robes. Best of his life.

     Baekhyun does work for a few hours and then settles in bed at eleven. He would text Chanyeol, but he remembers the time difference. Chanyeol would already be in bed by now. He grabs his phone anyway, supposing Chanyeol will just see the message in the morning.

Hope you slept well, yeol.

     I’m not sleeping yet.

    Baekhyun laughs. Chanyeol has always been a night owl, but lately he’s been sleeping at around ten or eleven. Why not? Go to bed, it’s like 2am where you are.

- Too busy missing you, baby.

Where’s the sappy coming from all of a sudden? You should be like this when I’m home so I can know I’m appreciated.

- I’m serious baek. I miss you so much.

It’s just been a day, chanyeol

- It’s too long

If it makes you feel better, I’d rather be home with you

- Why didn’t you just stay??

Because I have a job

- Well never do this again okay I miss you

Seriously babe it’s only a few days

Hey I gotta go to bed okay? i have to go out and be an architect tomorrow early in the morning.

I love you 

And go to ing bed

     Baekhyun turns off the display, settling into the covers and pillows. It’s cozy, but it’d be better with Chanyeol. Of course, minus the sleep-talking and coversnatching tendencies. Chanyeol is ing annoying, Baekhyun concedes as he turns off the lights and stares at the little green one on the smoke detector. But he loves him just the same.

     Chanyeol writes down a chord progression that he thinks is not much short of musical genius. He’s not very good with words, like Baekhyun is, so it takes him a while to write words down by them.

Snow is falling now

Lights are shining pretty in the streets

But not as bright as you

Merry Christmas, they’re all calling

They’re asking why I look so blue

Well I don’t have you

Oh winter lover, won’t you please come home

I’m here, so empty, so without you, so alone

You make me happy and I’ve got no backup plan

Cause when I’m missing you

There’s nothing I can do

     “It’s Friday, I’m coming back in a few hours,” says Baekhyun, phone pressed between shoulder as he types up an email on his laptop. Sleet is pelting down hard outside, and he dreads the thought that he has to wait to flag a cab down in that weather. “Aren’t you happy?”

     “Of course.” Chanyeol hums. “I’ve written you a song, you know. I’ll play it for you when you get back.”

     “Is it a romantic ballad?”

     “Yes. About how I’ve missed my lover for so long.”

     “Jesus.” Baekhyun snorts. “Is this just because you don’t want to do the dishes?”

     “I did the dishes,” Chanyeol says, slightly pouting. “I resent that comment.”

     “Yeah, well, I resent your existence.” Baekhyun sends the email. “I’m flying out in two hours and I’ll be back by eleven.”

     “Did you realize you’ll be back on Christmas Eve?”

     “Hm, really.” Baekhyun checks the calendar. “It is Christmas Eve. You’re right. I’ll be your Christmas present then, so I don’t have to buy you anything.”

     “That’s not fair. I already bought you stuff.”

     “Well too bad you missed me so much.” Baekhyun yawns, pushing the speaker button and throwing the phone on the bed. “It’s your own fault.”

     “You’re basically my mom.”

     “You’re dating your mom?”

     “Ew, gross.”

     “Did you even remember to feed the cat?”

     “See what I mean?”

     “It’s not crazy that I don’t want Mr. Muffin to starve to death.”

     “I take good care of Mr. Muffin, thank you very much. Plus he’s fat already, a few days without food could do him good. I should just put him on the treadmill.”

     “Please don’t,” says Baekhyun in a pained voice.

     Baekhyun refused to let Chanyeol meet him at the airport, so Chanyeol decides he’ll create a nice romantic environment for Baekhyun when he gets back. Chanyeol hurries up with it upon realizing it might possibly boost his chances of getting some tonight as well (hey, he’s just a 25 year old.) Their Christmas lights are already up, and Chanyeol semi-stealthily hides an abundance of scented candles behind walls so the whole apartment gets a not-obviously-artificial warm glow and smells like vanilla. Chanyeol feels like this would make any Room & Board employee proud. He moves to their bedroom, and upon noticing how messy it’s gotten without Baekhyun in the house, shoves everything that litters the floor into the closet, fluffs up the sheets and pillows, and dims the lights to half mast. He quickly smooths down his hair in the mirror with a dash of water (he doesn’t use gel, knowing that Baekhyun has a tendency to pull his hair during bedroom activities.) He goes back out to the living room, sitting down on the couch with his guitar and checking his phone for status updates on Baekhyun’s ETA.

     From the moment he fell in love with Chanyeol, Baekhyun had never wavered. Never felt any incentive to cheat, never felt anything for anyone else (and, though Baekhyun’s never had the courage to ask, Chanyeol never did either.) He could go on like this forever, working his way to the top of his career, coming home each day to Chanyeol’s composing and bad cooking. He could go on like this forever and he’d never get tired of a single moment, because Chanyeol is unpredictable. Every second is something new. Chanyeol’s eyes glimmer when he talks about their future, so Baekhyun is hopeful he thinks the same.

     He loves it just like this, but more than once he’s thought about sealing the knot for good.

     He wants to see that incredible look on Chanyeol’s face again, the one he got on when Baekhyun said yes on that winter day in college.

     He thinks, this time, it’s his turn to ask the question, and Chanyeol’s turn to say yes.