It happened so fast but the next thing he knew, he was already falling in line outside the venue of the fansign event. He clutched the album in his hand with colorful sticky notes inside with written questions and a girl who can’t contain her emotions right next to her.

(“I won a ticket for a fansign event, I was wondering maybe your sister would like to have it.” Seokjin smiled at the cashier—Jaehwan, who grinned.

“Oh wow, my sister would be delighted to know but…” He trailed off, “She has a ticket already.”

“Oh. I should have known.”

“You don’t want to go?”

“It’s not like that, I just don’t have any idea what to do there.”)

“Are you sure you prepared all the questions for each member, oppa? You didn’t miss anyone? That would be awkward.”

Seokjin blinked at Jaehwan’s sister. “I’m sure.”

She sighed. “How are you so lucky to win a ticket with just one album? I spent all my savings to buy as many albums as possible, you know?”

Seokjin laughed, a bit forced. In all honesty, he felt awkward standing here because he stood up in the crowd that consisted of younger girls. He’s too tall, too broad, too everything to be here that the girls barely reached his ear. God, and are those middle schoolers? They looked too young.

He caught few girls glancing at him, some are openly staring at him like they don’t know anything better. He swore he heard a group of girls say something like ‘look at that handsome oppa, is he their manager?’. He shifted uncomfortably in his spot, his fingers playing with the album.

He saw a few older women with professional cameras on hand, some of them are taking test shots and some are glancing at the screen while pressing buttons.  

It wasn’t too long until they were allowed to enter and Jaehwan’s sister almost fainted on the spot.

The venue wasn’t anything grand, they were outside, literally an open area with tents to shield the fans and the idols from the scourging heat of the sun. He was given the queue number almost the near end of the line, although there’s only few people so it shouldn’t take long. Jaehwan’s sister murmured encouraging words to herself. Breathing in and out every now and then to calm her nerves.

He saw Yoongi stare at him for a few seconds before he waved a hand to his direction in which Seokjin returned with a small smile. After that, Yoongi returned to the girl in front of him who gave him a pig hair accessory.

“What—what? Do you know Suga-oppa personally?” Jaehwan’s sister—that he forgot the name asked with a confused face.

“Uh.”

“Ah, he’s probably surprised to see a male fan in a fansign. That’s pretty rare.”

Seokjin let out an awkward chuckle before he ducked down to hide, he doesn’t want to be noticed by the other members—especially Jimin who would definitely yell ‘IT’S HYUNG!!!’ if he was spotted.

He stole a glance to where Jungkook sat, he’s in the farthest right. The last person who would entertain the fan. They pretty much arranged their positions by age. He saw Jungkook talking animatedly to the fan in front of him, he would smile shyly every now and then. He looked…different. Well, Seokjin saw him on television a few times but seeing him in person is like a punch in the gut to wake him up. He looked like a completely different person from what Seokjin remembered.

He never knew that two years can completely change a person.

At least he looked healthy. He’s probably eating well (he had to be, with Yoongi watching him 24/7 like a mother hen in their dorm as what Namjoon informed him). He doesn’t look like that shy Jungkook back at home, that Jungkook who couldn’t sleep without his frog stuffed toy, and that Jungkook who always asked him for help with his homework (gone that cute Jungkook who said that he wanted Seokjin to be his first kiss, what a silly boy. He probably kissed a girl already, maybe a fellow trainee).

A staff tapped his shoulder informing him that it’s his turn. He murmured an apology for not paying attention as he moved forward and knelt in front of Yoongi who tried so hard not to grin.

“Hi,” Yoongi said as he took the album to turn to his page.

“Hey.”

Yoongi chuckled. “I’m not sure how to talk to my boyfriend in my own fansign. Should I call you babe?” He looked at the fan next to Seokjin to make sure he wasn’t heard. Thankfully, she was too engrossed in whatever Hoseok was telling her.

“Yoongi!” Seokjin hit him on his hand lightly. “Be professional, geez.”

“Fine, fine.”

Hoseok let out a loud and embarrassing snort next to Yoongi.

 “Suga, what’s your favorite food?” The rapper read the question on the sticky note on his page. “Really, hyung? You can’t be more original than this? I answered this like ten times already today.”

“Shut up, I have to put generic questions because the staff will check it before we enter.”

“Fine,” He said as he wrote his answer that reads as ’anything Jin-hyung makes.’

 “Liar.” Seokjin hissed. “You always complain that the food I cook is too salty, too bland, too whatever.”

“You add too much sesame oil!”

“See? That’s what I’m talking about.” Seokjin pouted.

“But I still eat them because they’re my favorite. I miss your cooking, hyung. No one can cook in the dorm.”

“You can cook scrambled egg.”

Next to Yoongi, Hoseok choked on air and the fan asked him if he’s alright.

“Yeah, I’m alright I just heard something funny.” Hoseok assured the girl in front of her who looked like she didn’t buy it but nodded her head in understanding nonetheless.

“I’m gonna kill him.” Yoongi murmured under his breath before Seokjin had to move to Hoseok.

“Jin-hyung! I didn’t expect you here!” Hoseok chirped happily as he opened the album to his page.

Seokjin smiled. “I hope you’re doing well, Hoseok-ah.”

“I’m doing perfectly well but Jimin and Jungkook are pain in the .” He whined. “So let’s see what you wrote here for me, ‘if you’re stuck in an island what will be the one thing that you will bring?’ hmm, I’ll bring Jin-hyung!” He wrote his answer.

“I said thing. Not a person.”

“But Yoongi-hyung and Jiminnie said you can cook! I need you.”

A snort, “Fine.”

It went well, if you’ll ask Seokjin. It wasn’t awkward to talk to them because he technically wasn’t treated as a fan especially with Namjoon who kept complaining how his back hurts and how badly he needed a massage, and Jimin who was more than glad to see his favorite hyung again after having to put up with Namjoon’s snoring (in which Seokjin had to remind him that he snores loud too).

“Yesterday, Namjoon-hyung broke the door to the bathroom and Yoongi-hyung had to fix.” Jimin said.

“It wasn’t me!” Namjoon whined and Jimin slapped his arm to remind him to focus on the fan in front of him.

“It was definitely him, he touched the doorknob and it fell on the floor with a loud thud.” Jimin squinted his eyes to recall what happened in exact detail.

After Jimin told Seokjin the exact detail of the bathroom door incident of the year, a manager nudged Jimin’s arm to tell him he needed to entertain the next fan. With a kicked puppy look and a pout, Jimin had to say his final words to Seokjin with a promise of a barbecue dinner next week on his day off.

“Good luck, hyung.” He said after the barbecue as soon as Seokjin moved in front of Jungkook.

Jungkook. Seokjin couldn’t look up. He stared at the table, at the album, and Jungkook’s hand that held a white marker pen. He swallowed thickly before he gathered his strength to smile and look up to Jungkook.

He was expecting the younger to give him a frown, a dirty look, or anything similar after what he had than two years ago. He was expecting the worse but not this.

Jungkook was looking at him with a smile, eerily similar to the look that he gave to the fans who were in front of him before Seokjin and it made the elder uncomfortable.

The younger didn’t say anything as he grabbed the album on the table and flipped to his page to read the question for him.

He uncapped the marker and started writing on the side without the sticky note—

“It’s nice to see a hyung come today!” He said with an awfully cheery voice that it sent shivers down Seokjin’s spine. “What’s your name, hyung?”

Seokjin saw Jimin turn his head to Jungkook in the middle of writing a message to the fan. He gave Jungkook a look before he turned his attention back to the young girl, apologizing for getting distracted.

Seokjin couldn’t even utter a word, the words are stuck in his throat like a brick was pushing all his words down to his stomach.

“Hyung? Your name?” He asked again, his hand with the pen hovering on the page where he wrote ‘To:’

“Seokjin.”

Jungkook smiled as he wrote a thank you message on the page and read the question for him. “What inspired you to pursue this career?”

Seokjin expected Jungkook to give him a very obvious answer somewhere along the lines of big bang because he remembered Jungkook liking them back at home with Eunseo.

“Hm, tricky.” Jungkook hummed as he rubbed his chin. “I saw Big bang when I was younger and I wanted to be like them!

But,” he continued, “hyung, I’ll tell you a secret. Don’t tell this to anyone.”

“Sure…” Seokjin answered, looking down.

“Before I started my training the person I like rejected me,”

Seokjin’s stomach did a double flip, he let Jungkook continue.

“Because I’m too young. I wanted to prove them that I can be mature.”

Ah, Seokjin thought, if Jungkook will play this game then he just need to play along.

“Do you still like this person?”

“I hate him.”

“Of course you do.” Seokjin let out a strangled laugh. “He sounded like a horrible person.”

“He is…” A pause, “But I hope he’s doing well because he works too hard. I’m worried about his health.”

“You’re too nice, Jungkook-ah.”

“It’s not like I can stop falling in love even if I try to hate him, right?”  

A staff gently grabbed his arm, signaling him that he needed to go back to his seat. He nods to her before he stood up. He didn’t spare a glance back to the younger as he returned to his seat.

The heat of June clung to him like his second skin and he couldn’t wait to get home.

(And he couldn’t stay here, not with Jungkook’s fake smile, fake grin, and staged facial expressions. He doesn’t want to be here.)

-x-

“Hyung! You’re home, got food for me?” Taehyung jumped from his seat the moment Seokjin entered their apartment.

“Yeah. I got doughnuts.”

“You’re an angel.” His younger brother sighed dreamily before he snatched the box of doughnuts from him. He was already wolfing it down the moment he went back to where he was sitting few moments ago.

He dropped his bag on the floor and went straight to the kitchen to get himself something cold to drink.

“Where did you go?” He heard Taehyung’s question muffled by a doughnut in his mouth.

“Out.”

“Very funny, hyung.”

Seokjin sighed as he grabbed two glasses of cold water to the living room. He placed a glass in front of Taehyung and the other one to himself. “It’s nothing important.”

“I hope you didn’t go out to look for a third job.”

He gripped the glass a bit too tight. “I didn’t.”

He watched Taehyung empty his own glass of water and he did the same. “Before I forget,” He said, placing the glass on the table, “do you want to have barbecue for dinner before I go to work? We can eat outside, someone recommended me a place.”