//time fast forward to WIN era//

by then all the members already knew about the unspoken bond between jinhwan and junhoe - those moments of long eye contact and the comfortable that surrounded then; it was as if that their eyes spoke a language that only each other could understand. jinhwan would also have to admit how much he doted on the younger, using his secret authority as the eldest member to protect him from hanbin at times. junhoe himself was also pretty clear about how much he absolutely adored his hyung like a lost puppy, always willing to put aside his sass for a while just to make jinhwan happy.

they weren't supposed to feel that way - they were at the perfect act with raging hormones and plans to hit on girls but there they were: thoughts about each other filled their minds. undeniably they were gay - for each other.

it could all ended with a happily ever after (assuming that yg didn't catch them), but things were never so simple in this complicated world. there was just one problem, one HUGE problem standing in their way. 

they didn't know about the other's mutual feelings. jinhwan treated junhoe as a little kid (his little kid), the boy who was so focused on realising his dream to even bother about matters of the heart; while junhoe was far too caught up with the impression that his perfect hyung was definitely straight, and their relationship would approach a whole new level of awkwardness should his hidden feelings be discovered.

---

junhoe lied in his bed, wide awake at an unbelievable 3am in the morning. he should really be sleeping as they needed to be awake in 3 hours for their next schedule, but his mind was in too much of a mess to sleep in peace. he stared at jinhwan deep in slumber directly across him. he observed the elder closely, noticing how his chest heaved up and down with every breath that he took; how his long eyelashes rested gently on his undereyes. in general, it was just junhoe thinking about just how cute and perfect his hyung was. 

"hyung... are you awake?" a soft whisper left junhoe's lips. after waiting for a few seconds and getting no reply (other than jinhwan's breathing), he continued. "i'm so confused... why do i like you so much? why do i want to be with you all the time?"

junhoe eventually got up from his bed and walked over to his hyung's sleeping body. he bent down and placed a soft peck on jinhwan's forehead. it took him everything he had left in his body to do that, and whether he would ever have the courage to do it while the elder was still awake was a really good question. "good night hyung."

---

everyone knew how blunt and straightforward junhoe was, always saying his mind without ever thinking of the consequences (even after getting whacked multiple times when he shouted at his dearest bobby hyung to shut up), but when it came to jinhwan everything was just so different. back when he was still schooling, whenever he had his eyes on a certain girl he would just directly approach her and ask her out, merely taking rejections as the cool breeze that passed. however, now he was so scared to even show how he felt towards his hyung - maybe it was just because he so desperately wanted to be loved back by the one he treasures so dearly. 

junhoe actually thought about the various possibilities in his head. firstly, would be the worst case scenario where jinhwan was straight. it would just be so weird to stay in a room with a male who sees you someone more than a close friend, and there would go their wonderful friendship that took so much effort from both sides to build up. next was the case where jinhwan was actually gay - but he deserved so much better than the troublesome teenager that junhoe was. jiwon and hanbin were always there for him since the start (even before junhoe entered the scene) and both of them could probably give jinhwan so much more than he himself would be able to. lastly was the classic disney fairytale where jinhwan actually liked him back. but honestly, what was the possibility of that happening? close to none.

and that was then that junhoe decided to just be contented with having a brotherly relationship with jinhwan. he really couldn't afford to risk whatever he had now for that slim chance of having something more. he simply could not imagine his future life in yg without his jinhwan hyung by his side. junhoe decided that all he could do was to continue making his hyung smile and laugh - that way he himself would be happy too. 

recently unfortunately, maybe it was just junhoe but it seemed as if the other members were overly touchy with his favourite hyung. hanbin and jiwon constantly had their arms around the smaller guy whenever they were near; yunhyeong would ruffle jinhwan's hair; and donghyuk even had the nerve to place a kiss on the elder's cheek in which jinhwan replied: "aren't you sweet today" and junhoe badly wanting to punch donghyuk. 

and it was exactly in times like this where junhoe wished that he would be as comfortable as the others in showing his affection for jinhwan. he definitely was not that open to skinship, and jinhwan was already considered an exception in which junhoe could comforably drape an arm around the elder's shoulders, or allowing jinhwan to lie in his lap when they were in their room. maybe if he hugged his hyung more often, he would slowly grow to know how much junhoe actually loved him.

it wasn't like they didn't share hugs, really. but it was always jinhwan who initiated it, saying that he's cold half the time. (but it wasn't like junhoe minded; jinhwan's hugs did indeed make his heart warmer) and junhoe also could not help but feel how their bodies were a perfect fit against each other's all the time, and longed for the time where he could boldly go up and hug jinhwan tightly without anything holding him back.

and so nights passed with junhoe staring at his hyung and thinking about him for nearly an hour every day, thinking about the special moments where it was just the 2 of them in their own little world, where junhoe's heart unknowingly beats a little faster whenever he sees his beloved hyung smile, where jinhwan always snuggles up close to junhoe's body while holding him tight. and whenever these thoughts get too much for his stressed out mind, he would quitely walk to jinhwan's bed, before giving his hyung an innocent kiss, or muttering small words of affection that would normally be impossible to hear from junhoe. or he would talk to the elder's sleeping body about whatever was on his mind.

little did he know that jinhwan would be awake, pretending to be asleep for an hour just to see what his junhoe would do that night. his junhoe.

~

i've decided to skip out on many of the actual events that happened and focus on (imaginery) junhwan interactions instead hope you guys dont mind, and that you all are enjoying the story thus far!! (: sorry about the relatively short update!

how many more chapters should i do? (im thinking of maybe 3-4 more? please let me know if you think that this is progressing too fast!