Strained I let the lifeless arm that I was holding drop and thus made the others that were also carrying the body unbalanced. Jimin let out an indignant snort as he now had to carry the entire weight of the right side.
"That's bull", I mumbled more to myself than to the others and brushed the mud off my pants or rather I tried to, because the dirt had firmly settled in my wet pant legs.
"Hey, what are you doing?" Jimin called and let the leg he was holding fall to the ground.
By force, our group stopped and Jungkook and Namjoon on the other side also let go of the body.
"This is bull!" I shouted a little louder.
"You didn't have to come with us!", Jungkook replied angrily.
The dirt of the evening had found its way to his face and his split lip stood out even more as he glared at me. Nobody seemed as enthusiastic about the whole thing as he was. I didn't mean that he was happy that we were just about to dispose of a corpse, but he also seemed to mind less than the others, because every now and then a smile appeared on his lips and he talked to us about the last Years we all seemed to have missed. He was happy we were together again even if we committed a crime. I myself also had little sympathy for the lifeless man who was now lying between us on the dirty floor and no problems with finally getting rid of him. I would do anything for my friends and precisely because it was Taehyung's problem, I felt even more willing to help, because the boy was the most innocent being I knew in this ty world. I would love to get rid of any dirt for him just so he never had to get to know the hard world. Well, for that it was a little too late. He shouldn't have to experience any further pain and tattling to the police was out of the question anyway ... we were all already too involved for that. Still, I couldn't be as excited that we were all back together as Kookie was. No matter what happened after that, we would never be able to go back to our old life, we would never be able to pretend this night hadn't happened. I didn't want to go back to my old life but I had concerns about the others. Some of them were still young and did not think about the consequences this would bring.
Would we spend more time together again afterwards or would we scatter apart again in hopes of being able to forget all of this? I didn’t know, what potential outcome I liked best. I wanted to be with them and talk and fool around but I was scared ... what should I do if they left me again? Wouldn't it be better to just go through with this and continue to live like before, or at least to try? Because I knew, that I would not be able to bear losing them again ... but what could I do if it would happen again? They saved me tonight even if they didn't knew it. Their call had let me escape the already blazing motel room, in which I wanted to just stay and burn everything, including myself! Now, safe here with my best friends, I started to feel a belonging that I hadn't felt in years ... and it scared me. I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder and I spun around, startled. Hoseok looked at me calmly with his sunken eyes and I had to swallow. It was him who had called me and bought me back from the burning hell. Shortly afterwards he picked me up on a street corner with Seokjin, Taehyung, Namjoon and Kookie and after Jimin joined us we were complete again after such a long time.
"Are you okay, Yoongi?" He asked me quietly.
For years he had refrained from using the polite phrases that were so common in our country, just as he did with the others. Now and then he still used them with Seokjin and Namjoon, but he has spoken to me on a friendly, equal basis since I could remember.
I shook my head, then nodded and snorted in frustration because I didn't know the answer to his question. I was so indescribably happy to be with my friends and at the same time I was afraid of the moment when we would part again. I didn't want to go back ... I couldn't go back.
"Just don't leave me," I whispered in a hoarse voice. It was so quiet that I assumed he hadn't heard me, but to my surprise Hoseok pulled me into a hug and ran his thin fingers over my head.
"Why should we leave you? We just found eachother again."
His words calmed me down and I wrapped my arms around him. He had become so incredibly thin that I was afraid I would hurt him. Having noticed us, the rest of our group had gathered around. Jin smiled encouragingly at me behind Hoseok's back and put his hand on my head.
"This is not the end of our friendship, Yoongi," he said quietly but still loud enough for everyone to hear. "It's a new beginning."
Taehyung looked down, embarrassed. "I'm sorry, Hyung! I didn't mean to drag any of you into this mess …"
So far he had spoken the least of all of us, which was unusual anyway but understandable given the fact that we were just disposing of the body of his father. I broke away from Hoseok and pulled Taehyung up to me instead. I waited patiently until he lifted his gaze from the floor and met my eyes.
"I would do it again, Tae ", I said softly, brushing the long strands of his hair back from his forehead. "For me, even after all these years, you are the most important people in my life. I would do it over and over again for each of you and I know you feel the same way, so don't think for a second that you are forcing us to do this! "
A faint smile appeared on his lips before he pulled me into a brief hug.
"Can we finally finish this now? I'm getting cold!", Jungkook finally shouted.
General nods followed his words and we dispersed again. The lump of worry and fear in my chest was much smaller. I had to believe that everyone here would go through fire for me just as I would for him. Nobody would leave me, I would survive.
"Wait!" I yelled when Jimin, Namjoon and Kookie were about to pick up the body again. "I have an idea! How about we throw him in the river?"
"What ?!" Jimin called and looked at me with open mouth. "It couldn't be more obvious, Hyung!"
"But think about it! Taehyung said he was drunk and it is much more conspicuous to make someone disappear than to place him in such a way that he can be found but nobody will think that it was us!"
"I'm afraid I can't follow," Jin said now and exchanged a look with Jimin.
Before I could explain it to them, Namjoon spoke up. "He says it would be a lot more noticeable if Tae's father just disappeared. If he's found in the river with the amount of alcohol in his blood, it's more likely that it was a self-inflicted accident and that we are off the hook. "
"That's good and all, but they can see the wounds and find out that he died from them and not by drowning," Jungkook reminded us.
I grinned and pulled a piece of paper out of my pocket. "What if they assume that he was attacked because he did not pay his debts? He was attacked while drunk on the dike and fell into the water."
Nobody said anything after that. The others exchanged sceptical looks and Namjoon slowly nodded.
"The murder weapon is still in the trunk, we can leave it on top of the dike, remove Taes' fingerprints and then …? How are we going to convince the police that it was debt collectors? If the situation is clear, we might prevent them from investigating the matter further, after all Taehyung's father is already known and it's no secret that he was an alcoholic and had debts ... besides, there will be no one further interested in this matter."
I nodded vigorously and took a step forward, the note in my outstretched hand.
"We'll just put this in one of his pockets."
Curiously, they leaned over the note I held out to them and their faces lit up.
"That's perfect, Yoongi!" Jimin shouted.
"Why do you have that?", Hoseok asked and pointed to the note.
I shrugged my shoulders and bent down to the corpse to finally get rid of the note. As soon as I had stowed it the corpse’s right trouser pocket, a weight came off my shoulders and I could breathe again. There was absolutely nothing left of my previous life. Everything was in ashes ... but it was as Jin had said. This was not the end but a new beginning.
"I might tell you about it another time," I replied Hoseok and smiled up at him.
Seokjin had taken my place and slowly made our way back to the car to carry out our new plan. Hoseok put his arm around my shoulders as we slowly followed the others and covered their tracks.

How good that my friends had found me.