Monday comes around and Baekhyun is sitting at his dining table, daintily picking up his bottle of beer and takes a brief sip. An audible groan erupts at his side just as he reaches over to the bucket of chicken wings to snag a piece and he clicks his tongue at Kyungsoo, who's lifelessly hunched over the table, arms cushioning his head.

He’s the exact opposite of what Baekhyun is now -- the perfect portrait of calm and composed as he takes neat bites of the spicy chicken. There’s a thundercloud seemingly hanging over Kyungsoo’s head, darkening the frown already etched on his face.

“I don’t really get what your problem is Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun says while examining the remains of his food. Another low groan is the only answer he gets so he chances a glance at him and suddenly feels sorry for Kyungsoo, who looks just about teetering on the edge of his sanity.

So he does that thing he knows Kyungsoo finds comfort in and extends his free hand to rest on the other’s nape, caressing it in careful, doting motions and the shadow on Kyungsoo’s face rolls away some. Baekhyun’s hand slides away as Kyungsoo straightens up against his chair, staring at the surface, troubled sigh escaping his lips.

“It should be easy, right? To just go up to him and ask him out to dinner or a movie. It’s a few simple words. Go. Out. With. Me.” Kyungsoo shifts to look directly at Baekhyun. “But there is always something there, hanging over me, making me stop every. damn. time.”

There is no question but Baekhyun knows Kyungsoo is asking him for an answer so he places his half-eaten chicken back, wiping his hand on a  nearby tissue and breathes in, trying to sort out the many thoughts he had on this ‘I like Jongin but I’m too messed up to do anything about it’ dilemma.

“I’ve been standing by the sidelines, watching you, watching both of you really, and I’ve kept my mouth shut--” he pauses when Kyungsoo lifts an eyebrow at that,  “-- well, tried to keep my mouth shut, on the important stuff anyway,” he amends and Kyungsoo purses his lips. 

He turns so that he’s fully facing Kyungsoo, making sure he’s focusing on only Baekhyun and nothing else, then continues, “I let you be, so you could decide for yourself what you wanted to happen with Jongin. I never really forced you to do anything for fear of pushing you too soon or too much, that might make you slink back into your old shell. But then, something happened that actually surprised me.”

Here is where Baekhyun smiles, a fond sort of smile, which makes Kyungsoo furrow his brows in curiosity. “You changed. Three agonizing years after that er broke you, you finally cracked open your crusty, comatose heart and let someone in. And rather than saying it’s Jongin who caused that, I’d like to believe you accepted it, for yourself, on your own. Jongin just had the most impeccable timing, coming at the exact time you decided to open up.”

Kyungsoo’s still frowning as he looks at Baekhyun and says, “It still doesn’t make it any less harder for me to… to deal with all of this.”

“You still think you’re not good enough for him?” Beakhyun asks, taking pains not to sound threatening even though he wants so much to scream some sense into him.

Kyungsoo almost wants to cry as he nods repeatedly, swallowing the knot in his throat as he replies, “Yes. I’m scared that Jongin will realize I’m not worth it. The same way that... that bastard did when he left me. Because he found someone else he’d rather love.”

“Oh Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun breathes, reaching out to caress his hand. “It’s the complete lack of self-esteem that makes you think that. But that doesn’t mean it’s true. And it isn’t fair comparing them both. Jongin is different from … from him. You know that don’t you?”

Though he feels the tears start to pool behind his eyes, he manages to smile because yes, Jongin is different, Jongin isn’t like anyone he’s ever met before.

Baekhyun grins because he rarely sees that smile on Kyungsoo. “I thought so.” He lets go of his hand and continues. “ I know this isn’t just about asking him out. It means more than saying a few simple words. It means leaping over the stone walls, the chain-linked fences and the metal spikes you’ve built around yourself to keep out anyone who could potentially hurt you.”

The eyes staring back at him are slowly glossing over but Baekyun pushes on, because Kyungsoo needs to hear this. “And I understand that it’s hard. Because the years you’ve spent setting those up made it all the more impenetrable. Either for the guy who wants to get in, or the you who wants to break free.”

Kyungsoo drops his eyes and Baekhyun thinks he might start crying, but he only grabs his beer and takes a huge drink, although his eyes are still watery. “So what I’m saying, Kyungsoo, is it’s your choice. To find the courage.  To realize that you are worthy. I can’t make you see that. Only you can.”

“I’m too goddamn scared,” he whispers against the bottle top.

“As you should be. Because it is scary.” He grabs his beer and takes a huge gulp, this serious talk  making him really thirsty. He sets down his bottle and looks up at Kyungsoo. “But fear is very effective in shutting down the many paths that can lead you to  happiness. If you let it. At the end of the day, it’s still about the choice you make. Choose to hide. Or choose to be happy.”

Kyungsoo continues drinking his beer and Baekhyun expected as much, him being thrifty with his words. It’s quite obvious he’s thinking over what Baekhyun said and he’s okay with that.

It’s getting a bit too depressing for him, so he tries to change it, deciding to tease a little, if only to draw out a smile from Kyungsoo. “It’s pretty fun being a bystander to all of this, I get to see all the sides, the angles and the edges that you can’t. I'm enjoying it very very much”, he brags, clearly exaggerating.

Kyungsoo, who'd taken another sip, almost chokes on his beer as he laughs a little. “Fun huh? Is that so, you ? Well then tell me, what do you see?”

“You. Scared less.” Kyungsoo makes a face at him.

“And you, stupidly happy, despite of it.” Kyungsoo’s cheeks faintly color, trying not to smile and Baekhyun catches on without difficulty (it’s a special skill one earns for being best friends for ages).

“It’s not just me, the guys noticed too. Fridays -- you’re all smiley and peppy and come saturday,  you can’t keep still and there’s an imaginary rocket roped to your shoes with how fast you leave the office.”

“Oh god, shut up,” Kyungsoo groans, giving him a half-hearted kick because while it is true, it doesn’t make it less embarrassing to think he’s been too obvious and that every one of his friends have been silently watching.

Baekhyun  kicks him right back, and  he’s glad the cloud over Kyungsoo has cleared away. “You can at least admit that there is something there right? Between you and Jongin? Don’t lie. I’ll bathe you in beer if you say no.”

“Yeah, I think there might be?” he answers, voice small and painfully shy.

There it is again, Baekhyun thinks as he sees the soft smile unfolding on Kyungsoo’s face. It’s the same smile he’d seen years ago, when Kyungsoo had started dating the guy he would always refer to now as the .  The smile that has Baekhyun convinced, without any shadow of a doubt, that Kyungsoo absolutely likes Jongin. Maybe he’s already a little in love, but that part he keeps to himself because Kyungsoo is skittish enough as it is.

“Well you know what needs to be done, right?” He grabs his beer bottle and holds it up, and Kyungsoo takes the hint, answering with a nod and a smile as he clinks his own bottle against it before they both finish their drinks in one go.

“When the hell did you get so smart?” Kyungsoo wonders out loud as he stands up, gathering all the empty bottles to deposit them on the sink.

Baekhyun remains seated as he finishes his leftover chicken. “Excuse you, I’ve always been smart and sage-like. But after seven or so beers, I turn into a damn genius.” Kyungsoo snorts but doesn’t argue.

When he’s ready to leave, Baekhyun follows him to the door and watches as he puts his shoes on. “Look at the bright side ‘soo, if he does turn you down, which I can bet all my life savings he absolutely  won’t, there’ll only be two more Saturdays left in the month for him to clean your apartment before you choose not to renew the employment contract for next month. Then you’re rid of him.”

As soon as he’s done with his shoes, Kyungsoo stands up with a really deep frown, the lines in his forehead visible with how hard he’s knitting his eyebrows. “That… that doesn’t make me feel better, Baek.”

“Oh. Uhm, sorry?” he says, pinching the sides of Kyungsoo’s mouth and pulling so that the corners of his lips turn up into a smile. “Stop frowning so much because wrinkles.”

Kyungsoo bats his hands away but pulls him in for a tight hug right after. “Thanks Baek. I needed this,” he says in earnest against his ear. Baekhyun kisses the side of his head, sputtering instantly when he gets a few strands in his mouth in the process.

“You okay to drive?” he asks after they separate and the other nods.

“I only had like two beers, you drank most of it.”

“Ah, in that case, drive safe buddy,” he calls out before Kyungsoo leaves.

Baekhyun walks back to the dining table to put away the untouched pieces of chicken and suddenly wonders why after all this time, after all his subtle flirting, Jongin hadn’t really stepped up and made the first move. He can’t really think of a decent explanation, so he stops trying to figure it out as he clears the empty bottles and stashes them in the garbage bin.

___________

Yixing walks toward Baekhyun’s cubicle and isn’t surprised to find Kyungsoo there, half-leaning, half-sitting on Baekhyun’s table. They’re close friends so he doesn’t think twice about interrupting them in the middle of a seemingly serious conversation. Both of them turn their heads at him when he greets them a bright ‘hello!’ and he gets the greeting thrown right back. He stops to stand next to where Kyungsoo is sitting.

“’soo just wanted to thank you for the birthday gift, I love it really.”

"What did you get him 'soo? It's obviously not socks because Yixing is actually thanking you and not hurting you physically." 

Kyungsoo huffs. "I gave him an awesome gift. Personalized pillows. I lifted some pics off his IG, of him and Joonmyeon, and had it printed on the cases." Yixing smiles at him again because Joonmyeon's handsome face on his pillows is a wonderful thing. 

He looks to Baekhyun then. “And you, Joonmyeon says thank you for... the gift. I'm still undecided whether I like it or not."

Baekhyun just winks at him, prompting Kyungsoo to ask what it is he bought them.

"Over-the-door sling", Baekhyun proudly replies and Kyungsoo flushes because how does that even work? He doesn't get to ask for details because Yixing jumps to another topic they both find highly amusing.

"What is up with Oh Sehun? I found him eating lunch in the bathroom just now, and yesterday too.”

They both burst into a fit of giggles and Baekhyun calms himself down enough to answer. “Last saturday, at your party, he unwittingly hit on Mr. Lee’s spouse, which unfortunately for him, Mr. Lee had seen  the entirety of.”

Yixing eyes bulges out as he laughingly says, “No way! He hit on Donghae? For real?!”

Kyungsoo nods. “Yup. We were there. I could almost see smoke steaming out of Mr. Lee’s ears and nostrils from him being so pissed at Sehun.”

“Holy !!” Yixing cries out as he doubles over from laughing. “That is pure gold!!”

“So you see, Sehun has managed to avoid Mr. Lee since yesterday. I don’t know when his luck will run out though.”

Yixing finally settles his laughter into giggles as he wipes the few tears from his eyes. Kyungsoo then adds, “In his defense, Sehun didn’t know Donghae was married. He wasn’t wearing his ring, so yeah.”

“I’m curious ‘xing, is Donghae some sort of model or something? He’s a real looker.”

Yixing puckers his lips in thought before he answers, “From what I was told, Donghae used to model part time? Before he got married. He runs a few  businesses now. He actually owns that mexican restaurant a few blocks from here. Grill5taco.”

Kyungsoo lets out