“For me?” asked Kai, taking a step back. “Why?”

Luhan held out a hand. “Come here. We need to talk.”

Talk? thought Kai, his mind racing almost as fast as his heart. I can barely breathe, let alone talk. Does he know? How can he? Even I don’t know. Know what?! None of this makes sense. Despite the internal struggle, he couldn’t say no to his favorite hyung.

Luhan’s grasp was as comforting as always. There was a softness there that calmed Kai’s nerves. He could feel his own rigidity succumbing to its effects.

Kai took a seat on the bed, just beside his hyung. Luhan was still holding his hand, gripping it gently. The two waited quietly for a while. Even without looking up, Kai could sense keen eyes boring into his soul.

“What’s wrong Jongin-ah?” asked Luhan, breaking the silence.

“Wrong?” asked Kai, unsure of how to answer that impossible question. “What do you mean?”

He felt Luhan pressing thin fingertips deeper into his skin, as if to convince him that he was really there.

“You won’t look at me,” replied Luhan, a hint of hurt in his voice. “The last time you did, you had tears in your eyes. It’s not like you. What’s wrong?”

Kai spoke the only words he could think of. “I missed you.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to upset you. But how can you miss me already? I’m right here.”

“I always miss you, hyung,” answered Kai, tears filling his eyes once more. He was being far too honest, even more than he had been with himself. The feelings were beginning to inundate his heart. He was not ready to surrender to this reality.

Before he knew it, Luhan had pulled him into an embrace.

“I missed you too. That’s why I came here. Our farewell at the concert hall, it wasn’t enough. There were so many of us. We barely even had a chance to talk afterwards. I couldn’t just leave you like that.”

“How did you get here?” asked Kai as he pulled himself up off of Luhan’s shoulder. He was suddenly worried about his hyung. Nothing else mattered.

Luhan smiled and wiped away his dongsaeng’s tears. “I grew up in this city. I know how to get around.”

“But what about the others, and manager hyung? What if they find out?”

“Don’t worry so much,” interrupted Luhan, Kai’s cheek.

Kai felt his face flush. “I don’t want you to get in trouble.”

“What’s the worst that could happen, even if I get caught? They’ll yell at me? Getting to see you is worth the risk.”

“What if you had been recognized by a fan? What if the others think you’ve gone missing? It’s not safe!”

“I managed to get here without any trouble,” replied Luhan, haphazardly. “Besides, Yixing’s covering for me, and so is Kyungsoo.”

“What?” interjected Kai. “They know?”

“I was the one that called Kyungsoo while you were in the van. I thought you might’ve figured it out, but I’m kind of glad you didn’t. I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“I knew it wasn’t his mom! Just by the ringtone! But I didn’t know it was you!”

Luhan laughed, his eyes turning into crescents surrounded by tiny wrinkles. Kai caught himself staring at the familiar sight. It always seemed to warm his heart, despite his troubles.

“I told him I needed to talk to you, alone,” explained Luhan. “He was kind enough not to argue or get in the way. But I knew he wouldn’t. That’s the reason I chose him specifically. He really cares about you Jongin-ah, even more now that you’re roommates.”

“I know,” answered Kai, not understanding why he suddenly felt guilty.
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