Today was the first day in a long while that i really thought about giving up. I was driving home from work - it was a really bad day at work for me - and when i realized i was crying my eyes out, driving at 90mph (the speed limit in my country is about 70mph), the car shook with effort, it's not very potent and has a few years... and i thought about not turning the wheel.. just simply lower my hands and let the car crash in the highway. There was no one around so... why not. I'm exhausted. I'm broken and i hate the fact that i only exist because my mother was selfish enough to have me and even more selfish for letting go of me, for not caring at all. I wish she had never had me. I wish so bad that i wasn't born. I ended up grabbing the wheel again. I don't care about my life, in fact i hate the pain i'm in and the fact that it never goes away, but thinking about what my death would cause to my grandparents, aunt and boyfriend... i cried even harder. And i'm still here. And it still hurts.