This blog post will consist of me rambling on and on about nonsense that ticks me off so honestly you don't have to read this. I'm doing this for more of my own personal reasons, just to relieve stress(?) I guess.

I like being alone but I also dread it and it's honestly why I feel so down in the dumps all the time. I push people away for no reason and I feel so guilty for not talking to that person/those people yet I don't do anything to start talking to them again. The cycle just keeps on repeating and repeating.

Start talking to someone.

Continue talking.

Stop for a little.

Talk a bit more.

Stop.

Stop.

Stop.

Repeat with someone new.

It's the same thing OVER and OVER again and it makes me so sad because I still see the people I used to talk to. I push people away and I don't know why and I get angry with myself and it.. I don't know. I just get angry with myself.

Another thing that's pissing me off is when someone tries so hard to do something but is hated on/put down while someone who bulls and barely tries is praised and treated like gods with work that is around normal or less than normal quality for the hardworking person. This happens all the ing time and it pisses me off because favoritism is horrible.

You know what else is horrible? Bullying. No, it does not make you seem 'cool' when you call someone 'gay' or '' or 'fruity' or any other stupid slang words you dimwits come up with as insults. It makes you seem like a complete douche and the only people that laugh and smile at your harsh bullying are other douchebags.

When someone cries because of your words it does not make them 'weak', it makes YOU a complete head because your words were enough to pierce a wound into the victim's heart that probably won't ever healed.

So, congratulations, head, you've successfully reserved a spot in hell.

No, I've never been bullied. I don't associate myself with anybody at school outside of school and I don't really talk inside of school either but I've seen this happen enough times. Sometimes I speak up and go, "Stop saying that, it's annoying." or "Leave her/him alone and do your work." and usually it'll work but other times people will just brush me off like I'm freaking dust on their shoulder and continue to humiliate the person they're trying to humiliate.

Humans are so brutal.

Why can't I be a kitten or something? Kittens are nice.. right? Or like a hamster? Perhaps a cuddly penguin? 

If you read this far then I question what you do in your spare time as much as I question the amount of actual genuine learning done at my school. But if you really did read this far then, thank you(?) I guess! Now you know how much stuff I try to keep bottled inside of my small body.

Oh, and trust me, crying doesn't relieve stress. No matter how many times people tell me that I don't believe them. Crying only makes me more restless and more tired and more stressed. Don't cry.

Find something you'd rather do instead of crying. Drawing, writing, singing, ect ect. I've done all three within the span of an hour after a long day and it helped me so much.

Speaking of singing hi yes click here 

I think that's all I have to say.. I think. Please expect more long blog posts like this. You don't even have to read them. Just expect them. 

EDIT:: I found something else to rant about. I try to hard to make people happy and to make people feel like they've done a good job on whatever they've done but nobody does the same to me? 

I love you all.

Smile today because all of you are amazing and you all deserve to have a beautiful, bright smile to fit your brilliant souls!

Psst, if you're gonna just comment about how I'm attention-seeking, please go else where.