When I saw the news the other day, I was at the mall lounge that time, browsing through the internet using my phone. I was surprised that my news feed was filled with "Tiffany and Nichkhun dating". Oh well. No. Actually, I wasn't that surprised. I've seen rumors of them over the internet last November. I can still remember discussing this issue with my friends and decided not to believe in it since it was just a rumor. That was 5 months ago. The statement released by JYP Entertainment says that they have been dating for 4 months now. So, yeah. I just realized... some rumors could be really true. Right? My motto was not to believe in any rumors without any official confirmations but this one changed my point of view for gossips. Haha~ anyways, that's not the reason why I wrote this blog.

 
When I first saw the rumor about Fany and Khun dating, I was like 'Ooh that's cute. They look good together' and blah blah blah spazz here, spazz there. Maybe because Nichkhun is also one of my favorite members from 2pm? (alongside Taecyeon keke). But of course, I didn't really believe in it because there was no confirmation of it. I even planned to put Nichkhun in one of my fanfictions as an antagonist/love rival in my TaeNy story. 

But now that it was confirmed. I... I don't know.

I guess I still need to sink it in. I remember after I browsed through the news on my phone that afternoon, I felt like my energy was drained. Lol really like literally. I kept away my phone and walked around the mall with my mind half-blank. I was kinda absent-mindedly window shopping haha. But thanks to the beautiful clothes and on-sale beauty products, I felt a little better and I seem to forget the 'issue' for a while (But I didn't buy anything except for some useful toiletries) lol.

But seriously. I felt really down. I'm a big shipper of TaeNy or should I say, I am a Locksmith. I've thought of abandoning my on-going TaeNy fics because I felt that it was pointless to continue it since my OTP has fell apart. I was actually even planning to create a new story and a sequel for one of my stories but I suddenly lost the urge to do it. Like. What's the point, right? But, thinking it over, I guess I'll just continue doing/reading fanfics as an escape from reality. I'll choose to stay as a Locksmith even though I know that there's really nothing in it. The confirmation of Nichkhun and Tiffany's relationship was like a confirmation that TaeNy wasn't real. Ouch, right? But that's the truth.

Or. 

If TaeNy was real, it must be a one-sided love, friendzoned. You can call me delusional because I think I really am. I won't deny that. lol.

There's something inside of me, thinking, what if it was Taeyeon who secretly loved Tiffany? It isn't that impossible though. She can hide those feelings by herself. But it could be both easy and hard for her. It's easy to pretend that you like someone but it's hard to pretend that you don't want the person you love. So even if Taeyeon gets into a relationship too, I won't put aside that idea.

Anyways. There's nothing we can do about it, right? All we have to do now is to accept it and support them. This is what makes Tiffany happy and as sones, we must respect it. I am a Yurisistable Locksmith. And to tell you the truth, Tiffany is my second favorite member from SNSD and my bias wrecker. I know I'm not the only one who feels this way and that's what I'm worried about. Nichkhun is also very famous and has a lot of fans. I'm worried that some  'immature' fans might hate/bash Fany because of this. This announcement didn't just break the TaeNy shippers' heart but also the other OTPs like KhunToria, SiFany and KhunYoung shippers.

Let's face reality, guys. I know it hurts but we are just fans. SNSD won't be single forever. In fact, I think all of them OR most of them are involved in a relationship --- secretly. They won't say anything about it unless they're caught. Haha. 

I still have one more strength left. Of course, it's her, Kwon Yuri. 

I'll keep holding on. So please don't reveal anything yet, Yul. I don't think I'm ready. Either you have one or you don't have one. JUST. JUST DON'T. PLEASE.  LOL.
I didn't cried even once since the Yoona-Seunggi and Sooyoung-Kyungho annoucement, up until now. But when Yuri's turn comes, I don't think I can hold it. I think I'm just going to cry alone and accept it. (Unless I like who that person is) hahaha~

This is the bitter part of a fangirl's life. We must learn to accept this fate.

Taeyeon's Instagram. November 6, 2013

Trans: "If you really love something you have to know how to let go."

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