guyss, i don't even know what to write anymore. idek, i thought i'd give an update to all my readers how i'm doing. well, today, i just completed my speech tournament but i'm so exhausted. i didn't eat any lunch (unless you count crackers being eaten at 3) but funny thing was, i wasn't even hungry. but now that i look back to earlier today, i'm so exchausted. and then i have to continue doing speech stuff. oh, and then finals. i know i'm supposed to be reading newspaper articles right now, but sometimes, i  just want to take a step from reality and live in a dreamland where there is no stress. 

where nobody will judge you, where nobody will hate you for your failure,

but instead, support you because you have tried your best. 

but in a world like ours, the fact that failure is looked down upon only brings more stress to our lives. sometimes, i feel like i should give up speech and debate. i really do. i mean i devote a lot of my time into this extra curricular. but i've met so many new people and quickly became friends with them. they've become my family. but when i see other's acheive success, i ask myself, when am i going to be like them? everyone around me has acheived success. but what about me? don't i deserve a time too? 

but eventually, i realized, my time will come soon. its just that some things take longer than others. 

idek what i just wrote. is this a drabble. idek. is this a rant. idek. i should go sleep, but back to speech and debatee. whee.