REVIEW: That voice is mine,not her's. (cream puffs)
Story Title [5/5]
The story title is relevant and it's related very much to the story's plot. And is it not too clichéd! Usually a title would say a lot that doesn't really relate to the plot as much. This title really catches a reader's eye. (-0)
Foreword and Description [9/10]
Your foreword and description were perfect. You added why you wanted to write this fanfic and it's true that SNSD deserves more family fanfics. It was unique for you to put it in a list usually I like to read paragraphs rather than lists. You even added a part of the story and an author's note which was quite usual. (-1)
Poster/Trailer/Background [6/10]
Everything is pretty. I just think that your background lacks connection to the story. It doesn't really have an effect on the story rather than cute shapes and colors. Your poster in fact did go with the story, but rather than the title, charcters, and your name maybe add some color to it and feel. Maybe some quotes would be nice. (-4)
General Story Plot [17/20]
The idea was good?. And you used the idea very well. It was mentioned in every chapter so far. It was amazing in fact. It's a very intense family story rather than a funny, cute family story. (-3)
Character Portrayal [11/15]
The charcters were portrayed well. You explained their roles but more pictures would be easier for the reader to imagine the scene in their minds. (-4)
Grammar/Spelling [4/5]
Your spelling is quite fine and grammar is fine too. Some errors here and there when you need a question mark instead of a period. And apostrophes needed here and there. (-1)
Writing Style [3/5]
Your paragraph structure aren't really paragraphs. Just one line for each sentence, making it much easier to read because I'm getting lazy. (-2)
Originality [8/10]
This story is like I said a very orginal family story. Very different from the other ideas on Asianfanfics. Very well done. I maybe saw a few with the same idea but oh well. Once I look for them they get deleted. (-2)
Captivating [9/10]
When I first read the first few chapters I didn't like it. I thought I was going to end up hating Taeyeon after finishing Chapter 12. Ended up not hating her. I did get lazy here and there. It was well written with creative ideas. (-1)
Flow and Entertainment [9/10]
Like I said I didn't like the idea of the story in the beginning but I did end up liking it. The flow was cool and entertainment was beyond entertaining. (-1)
*Bonus [3/5]
A Very Unique Story - (+1)
Not Afraid of Antis - (+1)
Creative Interesting Ideas - (+1)
Total [86/100]
A = 85% - 100%
Yay! im happy ^^
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