So I have this friend. Let's call her Raehan okay?

Since I was small I never really had a true friend. My childhood friend who I grew up with and with whom I went to school all these years was just brainwashing me; I just never realized. It hit me only in my last year of school (a few months ago -_-).

Anyways.

This Raehan girl (she's not the childhood friend alright?), has been my 'best' friend for... 2 years. Yeah. Well, she's very generous and never thinks twice about lending something to someone. She's very outgoing and has tons of friends from schools in different regions. She's a very family-and-friend- type of person who doesn't think it's awkward to punch a guy's shoulder playfully on the first meeting. I'd always admired these sides of her and she used to tell me everything. From the quiet and broody delinquent I used to be in middle school and high school, I also became an outgoing(?) type of person and I liked being with more friends than necessary. Haha.

Well thanks to that, in high school I got a lot more friends besides my childhood friend who got shuffled to a different class.

Woo. Here comes the interesting part.

I never really gave Raehan much of thought - I mean, "What kind of a person is she?" I never really thought about that. But my mom suddenly made me realize that she isn't the kinda person she seems to be.

Raehan always has her way.

She has to have her way.

It's been like that and I never, ever ever realized.

She used to borrow some of my wacky clothes which she thought were cool. Once I bought a doraemon hoodie in Malaysia for RM 10 (when i visited there with my friends and I'm a poor person ==) and she wanted that for some date she was going on. I gave it to her cuz she was always generous with me... so why not?

It ended up that she crumpled it up in her bag, didn't use it, and gave it back to me the next day saying "I didn't need it, I found a cooler one."

That wasn't what hurt me.

What hurt me was that she didn't bother to even take care of it. I had to wash it and iron it repeatedly because she had stuffed it in her bag along with a pack of rancid fried chips and leaking teriyaki sauce.

Anyways. I remember the last time I broke a small showcase-vase in her house, she threw a tantrum saying it was her grandpa's vase and that our friendship was over because I'd never be able to replace or repay, BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA.

Raehan was always a rich person, I think she still is. She has a sprawling house, a brother who has the coolest clothes and a wallet which is aching with money notes. Parents who don't refuse to let her buy even clothes she never uses. Well, whenever I went to her home, that's what I'd see and hear.

But she never showed off, y'know, maybe that's why I didn't know.

Since last year, she's been telling me a different story. I haven't gone over to her house for over a year know and it probably reassures her that I won't know the truth (if she's lying, that is).

What she's been telling me is:

"We've lost all our money. The pharmacy is going to be sold. My parents owe a million yen to certain people. Oh my god, and we can't even pay! What are we going to do?!"

After a few weeks:

"Hey, this week has been totally depressing. This morning my mom cooked me my favorite breakfast and told me it'd be the last time she cooks! What should I do?!!!"

"The moneylendors told my parents that they're going to kidnap me and my brother."

"Hey... don't get offended by this. But in case we lose our house, can I come live with you?"

Oh like PLEASE. She knows I'm not so well to do and my home is just medium sized with even some broken furniture. She knows it'll be a BIG STRAIN if she comes. As it is, when my grandmom and grandpa come home every three months, they need someone to help them around the house. Raehan NEVER EVER lets me help them. She's more interested in sitting in front of the computer with me, drooling over videos and such.

I mean, what she's telling me is a bit too far-fetched. Her parents own a pharmacy and they mint money like it grows on trees! There's NO WAY the business would suddenly have failed and they'd be so poor as she says.

It just hurts me, all of it.

I don't even know why she invents stories like these, to tell me.

Maybe she thinks I'll sympathize.

Hahaha.

Hahahaha.

Hahahahaha.

NO.

=_=

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU NEED SYMPATHY FOR RAEHAN???!!!!!!!!!    @)(*#@)(&$#*@^(%#*^%#@*(&^$&*(@#%$(#*^@(^$!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Mom and dad are in another town (a bit far from here) for signing some important documents. That just leaves me, my grandparents and my dogs, cats and mongoose. Cuz of that, I'm doing all the housework and my boyfriend and his brother next door come and help.

Well, she knows the difficult situation we're in and she calls me tonight (After a month that is) and cheerfully asks me, "Hey! Can I come over tonight?'

"Tonight? Why?"

"Well, It'll be a stress reliever for me. The police are looking for us since the money lendors filed a complaint against my parents for lack of payment. I dunno what I should do. I might have to live alone cuz my parents and brother might be moving away. So... can I sleep over tonight?'

"Well, actually no. It won't be convinient if you come right now. Come tomorrow; my parents will also be back."

"Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy???"

"I just told you, it's inconvinient."

"Well... I don't mind that..."

"In that case, will you help me clean around a little?'

"Clean?! No, I'm very tired. I just attended a funeral today."

"...."

"Okay, I'll come tomorrow then. See ya!"

It hurts me like hell. She wasn't attending a funeral; she was in the amusement park cuz she told me she'd be going there.

She just wants what she wants.

Just what she wants.

And that's it.

Downloading A-pop songs from my computer cuz it costs her on hers.

Watching videos on my computer cuz her mom doesn't let her do that in her home.

Cancelling a trip which she said she'd take me on (and which I was looking VERY MUCH FORWARD TO SINCE A YEAR; she cancelled it two times before too)

Wanting to use my boyfriend's phone because she thinks hers is less cooler.

Asking him for his oversize shirts.

Asking my parents if she can use OUR FLOUR, OUR VEGETABLES and OUR MICROWAVE to bake a cake that only she wants to eat. In the end she makes a complete mess and doesn't bother to clean it. Oh, and the cake is like a shrivelled up foetus, literally DRYING UP in your mouth.

Sulking if my mom doesn't let her come over on certain days.

Ignoring my urgent messages.

And a load more.

Sorry, some long rant.

I just wanted to get these emotions down on this blog.

Cuz she'd see it on FB. ==