I'm tired... of everything.

Lately, I feel like all my fears are coming true...

I wish my life would be like the fiction I write; I wish everything would be so easy. But it's not; reality .

I'm so damn tired of caring, loving, trying, talking, being lonely, missing, sleeping, crying, face smiling, forgiving, not being enough, food, busy friends, me, make-up, tears, stomach hanging over , boys, girls, friends, facebook, him, her, loneliness, the same ing routine, rumors, whispers, snickers, dressing pretty just to look happy, not telling, dealing with everything by myself, sadness, mirrors, being unhappy with myself, hopeless dreams, EVERYTHING.

These past two days I kept thinking about stuff, I usually overthink.

I found the cover Taeyang made of Chris Brown's song - Don't judge me... It has a strong meaning, as the lyrics are basically an apology for a girlfriend who is suffering because of the rumors.

He wrote on twitter, along with the link to the cover "This song defines many meanings to me."

Yesterday I was just saying to my friend that if I found out that YoungBae's got a girlfriend, I'd suffer more than I did when I heard that the guy I've liked for 3 years had one(me and my stupid idol-crushes). It's just a feeling, but I feel he's got someone. I hate being like this. I hate being a dreamer.

It feels like all my fears are coming true... nothing good ever happens; I'm tired...

Reality .