last night. i went out to study at the IT park where jishubunny and normibells work. and while standing with classmates i waited for my sister to come once she finishes hospital shift. when we were already in the car though, after buying cheesecake and muffin...

the clutch 'blew' on us.

[i drive a stick shift. a manual car so clutch is very important. i did hear that automatic cars have clutches too, idk] it was hard to maneuver. it took us a long time to get out of the parking lot. good thing i park inches away from the car before me, because the break really wasn't working then. >.<

it needs brute strength and even both me and my sister to shift to 'Primera' or first gear. oh, it was parallel parking.

my heart was really racing fast. and i couldn't go beyond the 4th shift or even the third and it became harder to go back to the 1st once we stop and put it in neutral. there were times that made me think - what if we'll leave the car -some side- and go home? because it was getting harder and harder i was really scared. for us but mostly of what our dad would do. coz he wasn't around they went out of town. the face he'd have if he founds out it was the wee hours of the night OTL

anyway... i don't think i'll be studying out any time soon. maybe during block finals or something. one, my dad doesn't like the idea of 'study out' when i could just study out home -with wifi and other temptations, he doesn't understand this. Two, he doesn't know the part that i studied out and it wasn't at some part of the city that i noticed the difference with the clutch - being all soft, and the stick shift being such an . i noticed the first one when i arrived at IT park. Three, i don't have much money.

and i realize, maybe someday i'll ask him about car stuff - engine and things. at least, if anything similar happens i'd know what to do and when to call for help.

and sorry, no Push updates for now. i've been busy. trying to live a holistic life keke. but i'll leave you with a NEW FIC. then i'll go back to studying. i'm only taking a break.

seriously, 5 subjects. countless photocopies. a hundred chapters. and yet only a 50 item test.