My eyes were busy scanning my surrounding when I unintentionally caught those of Jonghyun’s gazing at me, from across the crowd. Our eyes met, and I freeze. I didn’t know what to do, and for that one moment I totally forgot how to breathe. The air had left my lungs intentionally. We locked gaze in a staring game; I miraculously did not blink or look away. We just stared at each other.

I hated how this made me feel, longing and unwanting all at the same time. Longing to reach my hand out to him, taking that one step forward, towards him, but unwilling my heart to allow itself to want him. Torn in between two; logic of the mind and desire of the heart. Where do I go? Which should I follow? I noticed how his lips were twitching, agape a little like he wanted to say something, but he was hesitating and he finally made the first move. Towards me!

My breath hitched, nervous, not really knowing how I should react to this. What if he comes forward, to me? What do I say? Do I even want to talk to him? Does he want to say anything at all without making things look awkward? That’s when Eunmi called out to me, making me face her, “Rin, come on, I’m done. Let’s go home,” Eunmi tugged at my shoulder. She took my hand in hers and led me away from the park; saving me from Jonghyun and perhaps, that bittersweet longing of wanting to hear his voice once again. I dare myself to look back, curious to know whether he would follow behind. Sadly, he wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Maybe he was lost in the crowds, maybe he lost me when Rin took me away, home.