A lot of people says that the widest smiles and loudest laughs hide the biggest pain. 

A person who laughs a lot and smiles a lot will most probably have the deepest and most hurtful experience in his life. 

And people often associate this trait to being strong. 

Because how can a person still smile after all the pain?

How can a person still find the reason to laugh when problems don't let him sleep. 

I too, wish to be somebody like this person. 

Unfortunately, I'm not and will be far from this kind of person. 

But if someone is to ask me, what my favorite personality would be, I'll be giving out one word a little similar to the aforementioned;

STURDY. 

not strong, but sturdy. 

If you check out the meaning of the words in a dictionary, you will find that the words strong and sturdy are two synonymous words but if you study it closely, you will realize two slight difference between the two. 

When we say strong; it is mostly described as someone or something with strength. Meaning it gives out the power or the force to the reacting bodies. 

Now, when we say sturdy; it is used to describe something or someone that does not easily bent. How is that? for example, a strong typhoon strikes your background, and you have this sturdy tree in it. And because it is sturdy, the typhoon does not easily destroy the three. So, if this sturdy tree is the reacting body, then the force coming from the strong reacting body is received.

Get that now? 

Let's associate the word sturdy to me and let me explain why I chose this as my favorite trait. 

I would want to say that I'm strong, strong enough to face the challenges of life. 

However, I'm not. 

Believe me or not, I always break down in cries whenever there's a problem encountered. You know that feeling when I wanted to be cool and just say 'fighting!' but I can't? because I know it will never be that easy?

Or when I get sacred of facing my fears? (yep, far from being strong, right?) that I always end up second guessing about everything and doubt myself?

But I still keep going anyway. 

Even if I'm scared, or doubtful of my self, I still choose to get going. I let the problems find me and hit me, almost knocking me down but I stand on my sturdy feet, allowing the pain to get through me, allowing the things to hurt me. 

Without giving up easily. Without bending all so suddenly. Without dying even if it hurts like hell. 

Because I wanted to be strong, but I can be. I chose to be sturdy, because I know one day, I'll win my every battles with this trait of mine. 

So I hope you guys can be sturdy too. It's okay to be afraid or weak but never ever give up, not until it was declared that you lose. 

#entry4
#30daysofselflovejournalprompts
#growandbehappy