I heard from my friend today ...

She said that Onew's sick. He's in the hospital at the moment ? And his temparature is like 40+. He's maturing and so his "Onew Condition" is decreasing ... she also said that there's few of Jongyu moments [She's a Blinger] and more of Ontae. She also said that something seem to trouble Onew at the moment. His facial expression isn't fun and hyped and funny like before. Rather it's sad and down and and and ... like something's wrong ?

When I heard that ... I was so devastated and heart broken and it felt like a painful stab, like like this heavy throbbing .... Onew is sick. Onew is sick. Onew is sick.... it's something pretty new actually ... He was my first ever bias for like, my first Kpop month before I was more of an E.L.F. Becoming an ELF, I of course have more biases that override Onew's no.1 position on the list. Topping him is Ryeowook, Sungmin, Kyuhyun, Eunhyuk, Donghae and possibly Siwon. That is only Super Junior. I'm actually pretty fair [LOL] I think :S Or I think it is the ability of being unable to decide =.="

I can't bear to top one person and put them as a greater person than another so they are higher on my bias list. It's just ... weird for me. Like my top 5 Suju biases mentioned earlier. I can't really say who's first, second, third, fourth, fifth ... that's why I leave them all to my first and 1.5 top bias. That is, Ryeowook & Sungmin holds first place, Kyuhyun, Donghae and Eunhyuk all holds second or one point five. I can't really decide. At times, Kyuhyun jumps to be my number one too. He was my first Super Junior love afterall.

And then there's those other Kpop bands. Like BEAST. I mean I love all BEAST members and they are also pretty much high up my bias list too ! But after Super Junior ofcourse xD

I'm still lacking Kpop knowledge of many bands. Like the only bands I know well are SHINee & Super Junior. BEAST I know their names, their personalities [About 60%?], their MVs and some of the shows they've been on. I know a bit of MYNAME - I know their names, their personalities ... one MV O_O "Message". Heyy do they have any other MVs ?!?!

And that's pretty much it for boybands. For Infinite, I only know some names but I can't tell who's who. Same with a few others out there.

SNSD & f(x) I know their names & the person ... and a bit of their personality ... nothing else.

Same as DBSK.

Anyhow ..... back to Onew. It's like, with these newer things to me, they top over Onew. I still do like him, honest! It's just that I like Super Junior more. But when this news from my friend hits on me, I realised ...

Onew is important to me. I've pushed him further down my bias list, but I still like him. I love him. Why did I fall for him in the first place? Because he reminded a lot about me. How easily I fall, how our personalities matched, how cute and innocent he is [Me ... haha ignore the cute part] ... everything of him amazed me. The Onew Conditions made me laugh yet feel for him - Is he hurt? Is he Ok? Is it for fanservice? Or is it really his condition ? ASDFGHJKL I don't know what else to say (aka ran out of words)

I don't really get what I'm saying so far but if you understand it, thank you :)

It's just all these random things I've been thinking of xD

So ... to sum up ....

Is Onew Ok at the moment ?!

-Cindy-