I’m not taking this well

Kim Jonghyun wasn’t just an idol I liked because he was handsome, even though he was. It was beyond that. It was his voice. It was the way he saw the world and the feelings he poured into every song. Kim Jonghyun was a lot more than just someone I admired.

To me, he was beauty.

He was inspiration.

I always listen to him when I need to focus. Whenever I need to calm the storms inside me and be at peace. It was always him. It was his voice and his lyrics that always resonated deep within me and beyond language.

Right now, I’m not strong enough to play any of his songs because I know that the beautiful voice that always spoke directly to my soul like no other voice has ever done, isn’t there anymore. And that’s breaking my heart into pieces.

If I’m feeling this broken, I can’t begin to understand how devastated his family, the members and all of the SM family must be feeling right now. My heart and my deepest condolences are with them right now.

All that being said, I’ll stay away from the site for a few days. I really need to gather my thoughts and feelings. I need to put myself together and let this sink in.

Rest in peace, my lovely boy.