Okay... This bit of news is 12 days too late since the local organizers' announcement in my country and knowing that I don't have the moolah to spend over such luxury, I pretended this was The Exo'luxion in Manila (2016) all over again. I remember almost crying when the news broke out that they will really hold their concert for the first time here and since I am not financially ready for this milestone, I decided to let it go and just pray for the concert's success (it already was, since the ticket was sold out in just a matter of hours!) I guess I was just too lucky that the Kpop gods heard my (silent) desperation and then a Day 2 concert was announced! That in itself was another miracle since no other Kpop group has held their concert here for 2 days! So I got my chance to go but my daring self even pushed my purchase to a later date just so my finances can allow it (I have to make it work somehow that won't exactly leave me broke until the concert date hahaha). The actual ticket purchase wasn't a walk in the park since the ticketing office encountered system issues that same day so when I finally got the tickets for real, I got a little too emotional than necessary. But of course, it can't beat the emotions I've had before, during and after the concert day itself and that's another story to tell.

Now, the circumstances are still the same. I'm nearly broke af due to the holidays so I practically considered not going for real this time. My heart is breaking everytime I remember that I need to be firm in my decision and I am trying my hardest not to read anything to do with the upcoming concert and avoid watching in Youtube anything that's Exo-related. But my resolve crumbled when watching movie trailers led me to Exo again(I suddenly hated Youtube and it's recommended video feature like why are you testing me?!) Now, I'm back to arguing with myself whether I should come and see them, broke or not broke. This time around, Xiumin and Kai are hopefully able to dance (unlike last time when they were injured) and Lay possibly present but there is no sister to come with me and possibly no friends to meet up with. I am so torn!!! Ticket selling date opens in 3 days and I have to decide before then. Should I pray harder for Kpop gods to hear my not-so-silent desperation this time?! Or should I just let it go for real?!

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ps: xiumin and artificial love had a lot of hand in making me doubt my firm resolve... do and baekhyun and chen too for their amazing live vocals... kai and lay too for their y body rolls that I really really want to see for the first time... leader suho too for being a kind and gentle being that he is... and chanyeol for his enthusiastic presence that we got a lot of last year (and that unforgettable chanbaek hug that genius sehun ministrated in his sehun time)... ahhh that's basically exo being themselves and me being an exo l myself that wishing I can be there too to welcome them to our tiny country once again and hear them acknowledge their phixo fans one more time.

pss: my sincerest aplogies if you had to waste your time reading my nonsense. i just felt the need to dump my emotions here or i'll go crazy. sorry for being selfish af. i wont do it again, promise XD