Earlier, after writing my previous blogpost, I started to go through the lyrics for Yoongi’s tracks in Agust D. Agust D’s on fire, So Far Away is sentimental and sweet, and I chose to listen and analyse The Last’s lyrics next.

Not having understood the lyrics when I first listened to it, I simply thought it was another bombass rocking song I’d absolutely love. Yes, I do love the song – yet not in the way I expected.

The first three parts of the song talk about social anxiety and mental disorders, and I had somewhat assured myself that it wasn’t about Yoongi himself; I thought that maybe hey, he’s speaking up for those who face these things. Throughout those first three parts, there were so many relatable lyrics that touched my heart, but I remained silent about it.

It was when he said “my fans, my homies, my fam, don’t worry, I’m really okay now” that something ticked in me. I went to the comments section and realised that the song really is personally about Yoongi; reading comments about how so many of them felt the lyrics and how much they respect Yoongi, I broke down.

I went through the song again and lord, the lyrics really did hit home. I was crying as I thought that Yoongi had gone through the same things I have/am, and I was struck with the realisation that I’m not alone. Yoongi’s lyrics are spot on with the issues I’m dealing with and not able to take it anymore, I turned my laptop off and went to continue crying in the shower. Some of his lyrics made me realise things that I had never noticed I’ve been doing and I came with the conclusion that failing to notice might be the reason why I’ve been so blue.

I hadn’t known there are so many people like me out there, including someone I look up to – Min Suga himself. I wouldn’t have ever expected that he’d been suicidal before. I already do admire him, but my respect shot up for him tremendously. He’s brave enough to tell us what he’s dealt with and in my opinion, he really spoke up for us, those who feel the way he did. I’m so thankful for you, Yoongi.

When he said that he’s really okay now, I hope he is. I want nothing for him than his happiness and great health and success. I already love him so much, but I love him even more now (if that’s even possible).

This track had given me a warm embrace, in a way. I didn’t cry because of ‘feels’ or how ‘sad’ the song is, I cried because the song is like words from my own heart, spoken from another person. Yoongi made me realise I’m not alone – I’m very grateful for that.

This mixtape is a blessing. It really is.