Questioning. I need some advice...
Okay... so I'm not exactly the most affectionate person in the world, and I sure as hell know that, and so does my closest friends. And yet here I am tell my problems to people on the internet... fml.
I don't share all my feelings, but I'm the most talkative, and I don't like to talk or think about the past, present, or future, because all of it is annoyingly stupid, plus I really don't like to have panic attacks because I know my future plans are far out there.
I'm the most sarcastic and blunt person you will EVER meet. I'm always on the negative side of things because I find it as a joke, and some times I like to make fun of myself that way. I praise art and what emotions it shows, along with poetry.
I have very little closed area of friends, and I like that.
I have a thunderstorm for a family, and I can live with that.
So... why do I suddenly feel so different. Something is wrong. And it's been like this for months.
I want to tell my feelings, yet I can't speak without wanting to sewing my mouth shut.
I can no long be sarcastic or blunt, because it makes me feel like I'm saying something wrong. I can't make myself laugh with the negative without thinking too much about myself. I can no longer draw or even think about poetry without wanting to breakdown crying. With what little group of friends I have I feel like I'm be chocked when they are around me. I can't stand my family that it's depressing.
And I know you'll see, this, and read it, and you might be worried. (You know who you are). Don't be.
But, can anyone tell me what is wrong? Has anyone on here had a change like me and was fully aware of it but no one else noticed but you. Is something truly wrong with me? Or is it all just in my head?
I don't really expect anyone to read this. And I don't care. I was just wondering. Because clearly I can't speak with my words anymore, and non of my friends understand, or they just don't give a . (The ones I've talked to anyway.)
I'll be going now. I have to leave for school soon.
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