I just... Feel the need to vent out my anger. 

I am now an Administrator of a group, (the largest in my country) with 50K Members. I thought being an admin was just controlling the posts, making teh fandom stay strong, graphic designing and whatnot. But I was proven wrong. You need to contribute, meet-up with the others. Both I cant do both. I live on a province while most of them are up on the city. Contributing is a pain for me (I am saving for a concert -___- and my future). So... they might kick me out and I dont want that. But I guess I cant do anything at all. 

Vixx just arrived in my country, and here I am on the province just waiting for nothing. They will even hold a FREE presscon, and yet I still cant. Its okay if its Vix though, they could still comeback to my country as one in next years. Its just... EXO my bias group that I am afraid of not seeing. 

Inang Reyna (@Happee Hour on TW) said that EXO'Lu'Xion on PH will be next year, so I was glad about that. I could easily save for that time span. But what my mom had as a condition is burning through my heart. I need to get to my class' Top 5 and she will accompany and even pay for my tickets. That's cool. But what's not is that I am currently on 12th. So... I cant, really. So long to go. 7 more before I could reach.

I am trying my best until the new school year comes, ah, concerts, it stabs me... I just... I... I'm helpless. But hopeful. I still have faith in God. And faith in myself that I can do yhis.