the others had either gone out or were in their own rooms, so the living room was empty. minseok made himself comfortable on the couch while luhan searched through their collections of movies, looking for something they hadn't watched yet. he choose for one that looked like on of those horrible romantic teenage movies. even though he didn't like them, they were boring enough for him to fall asleep and that's all he needed right now.

he crawled on the couch too and put his head on minseok's lap. the latter's fingers entangled in luhan's hair and the soft brush of minseok's fingers against his scalp made luhan sigh in content.

he was right about the movie, it was a boring movie and he had long stopped paying attention to it. his thoughts were wondering to the conversation with dr. kim earlier. he still couldn't believe that he had to stop. it took him years to get his body this way, and even though four months weren't that long, it could change things. things the others would notice too.

for example, he would gain weight, and even though he was always a skinny person, it would still be noticeable. what he was most terrified of was the fact that he could get fat on his chest. he had had top surgery, so there is no tissue but there could still be a chance of him getting fat there. he decided that he had to be even more carefully with what he eats.

he hadn't even noticed that he started to cry until his head was lifted up. minseok wiped away his tears and luhan choked a sob. minseok pulled him into his chest and luhan wrapped his arms around minseok's neck, face hidden in his shoulder as he cried.

eventually luhan had fallen asleep, still cuddled up to minseok. the movie completely forgotten, minseok kept on luhan's back in concern. little did luhan know that minseok had heard a part of his phone call, and with his outburst minseok had gotten even more worried.

-

it had been two weeks since his last T-shot and luhan started to feel different. only minor changes, but enough for him to know that his body was asking for testosterone. the morning of the two week mark, he woke up feeling horrible. he had to run to the bathroom or else he would've throw up in his bed.

the sound of him trowing up had woken up yifan, who ran into the bathroom and helped luhan clean himself up. when yifan reached over to peel of luhan's vomit covered shirt, luhan backed away and told him that he could do the rest by himself. yifan looked doubtful, since he was in no state of being able to take care of himself. luhan again told him that he was fine and yifan left him, still unsure about him.

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