From a point of view of Jessica Jung

We were different. You were out-going. I was socially awkward. Yet, we were best friend. We had known each other for a long time. Probably longer than any of your other friendships. We used to be so close. We used to laugh together, share secrets, hug each other, and never leave each other.

But, now, everything had changed. We became friends with Taeyeon. Then you started to hang out with her more and more. You left me out there, being alone in a place that made me uncomfortable. You used to be my shining knight who helped me through my social problem. But, you were no longer there for me when Taeyeon appeared.

Do you remember when I was the last one to know that you and Nichkhun were dating? That was a huge slap to me in the face because I used to be the first to know everything about you. You told me your secrets and never left any details.

Do you remember when you called me to hang out with you? I was so happy because it was the first time in forever since we last hung out. Turned out you called me because apparently, Taeyeon was busy. I used to be your first choice, but, now, was I just a substitute? Because I didn’t want to be one.

Do you remember when Physic teacher asked us to pair us because we used to be partners all the times? The moment he told us to do that, I was looking forward to it. I turned to smile at you, but you were looking at Taeyeon in sorrow. I realized you didn’t want to be with me which was why I told the teacher that I would pair up with Yoona instead. I turned to look at you and you were smiling brightly at Taeyeon.

Sometimes, I wanted to endour friendship. I wanted to leave the group chat where only you and Taeyeon talked to each other. But, I couldn’t because I feared that you would forget me and I didn’t want to forget this friendship or there may be another reason.

Because of what happened between, I started to fear of being left alone. I hated to be alone when my friends enjoyed other things. I hated to be the only one who didn’t laugh at the joke because no one told me anything about it. And, I hated to see you with somebody else beside me.

Our friendship slowly started to drift apart to somewhere it could never return. I was now friends with Yoona and Sooyoung who were different. They didn’t leave me out. They filled me in with everything they were going to do even though we just became friends which was why I was very grateful.

I eventually decided to move on. I started to hang out with Yoona and Sooyoung more and I would usually leave you with Taeyeon even though sometimes you would still call me or chat to me. I started to feel better and was in process of overcoming my fear. And, I did. Everything were definitely alright. Without you, I was fine even though my heart still hurt deeply. I had never told you about how I felt and I didn’t regret. But, there was something you should know.

I was in love with you, Tiffany.