Unsurprisingly, it's Minseok's that convinces Baekhyun to finally pay Chanyeol a visit. Minseok is the one that sits him down after dinner. He's the one who kneels down onto the floor and rests a hand on Baekhyun's knee. For comfort, Baekhyun supposes. 

"You miss him." Minseok whispers. He gives Baekhyun a meaningful look that only has Baekhyun snorting.

“I don’t miss him.” He denies with a shake of his head, “I’m angry. I kinda don’t ever want to see him again.”

“You’re more angry at Jongdae than you are at Chanyeol, though, aren’t you?” Minseok asks quietly, using his thumb to rub comforting circles into the meat of Baekhyun’s thigh. “And if you are truly mad at Chanyeol, do you really have a reason to be?”

Baekhyun opens his mouth to interrupt, to protest, but Minseok only shakes his head and continues on. “Look. I don’t know what exactly happened -- and I’m okay with not knowing because I get it, it’s personal -- but I do know the timeframe in which this all happened. You came back. You received a text from Chanyeol about two hours later. You proceeded to break up with him over text and then turned your phone off.” Minseok breaks eye contact for just a second, quickly glancing to beside Baekhyun as his eyebrows furrow. “It’s still off, isn’t it?”

Baekhyun nods and Minseok gives him a little frown but goes on anyways. “From then on, you avoided him. You haven’t given him any time, any opportunity to explain himself.”

“He could’ve come over here.” Baekhyun frowns, crossing his arms. “He could’ve made the opportunity to come and explain himself.”

“In the hallways, you’ve avoided him. Anytime he so much as makes eye contact with you, you bolt off. Be honest with me. If he came over here, would you really have let him in and given him the opportunity to explain himself? Or would you have just slammed the door right in his face as soon as he came in?” 

Baekhyun doesn’t answer the question. All of his actions seem childish whenever Minseok picks it apart like that. “Still…” 

“It’s only been about a week and a half, Baekhyun, maybe two.” Minseok says, “I know for you, this seems like the end of the relationship, but to him... To him this might just seem like another fight and he’s giving you space to cool down before approaching you.”

“He’s giving me a stupidly long amount of time to cool down.” Baekhyun mutters, “At this point I’m starting to get even more pissed off than I was before.”

“Isn’t this a problem, though?” Minseok comments offhandedly, “The fact that you think it’s his responsibility to come and apologize to you, to come and fix everything for you while you just sit around and wait.”

Baekhyun’s eyes narrow into slits. “Are you or are you not on my side?” And this situation, this argument sounds so eerily familiar.

Maybe it’s the venom in his voice or maybe it’s the realization that this topic is treading on thin ice for Baekhyun, but Minseok backs down, dropping his eyes to the floor. “I am. I’m sorry.” He says quickly, flicking his gaze up to Baekhyun with large, apologetic eyes. “But maybe he realizes how badly he ed up and he’s afraid to approach you, afraid to see just how mad you are.”

Baekhyun doesn’t say anything, only offering a noncommittal shrug as a response even though it does seem to be a viable option. Slowly, Minseok rises to his feet and Baekhyun’s eyes follow him as he stands up. “Baekhyun.” Minseok says even though he already has Baekhyun’s full attention. “I know you’re too stubborn to admit this, but you do miss him -- I know you do. Maybe it’s time for you to make the first move.”

And before Baekhyun can say anything, he leaves.

x    x    x

As much as he hates to admit, Minseok’s advice resonates with him. Maybe he really is being childish; maybe he really is overreacting. The point that strikes a chord, though, is the idea that he really hasn’t given Chanyeol an opportunity to explain himself, to explain the whole damned situation. 

This kind of reasoning has him lingering in front of Chanyeol’s apartment, hand poised just inches away from the door, ready to knock. It takes him a bit of time to solidify his resolve and even when he does, it’s still pretty shaky. He mentally promises himself that he’ll only knock a total of four times and if Chanyeol doesn’t answer within five minutes, he has all the reason to just turn tail and go back to his own apartment.

He counts the seconds as soon as he knocks three times and he's approaching his 300 second before he can bolt when Chanyeol opens up.

Chanyeol looks pretty good, actually. Not that Baekhyun was expecting (hoping) that Chanyeol would be a wreck after his impromptu breakup. 

As compared to before, the slight rosy glow has returned to his skin, the sharp shadows that were previously cast before by jutting cheekbones and deathly pale skin have softened. The only thing that hasn’t really changed from before is the uncharacteristically dead look in Chanyeol’s eyes. Baekhyun can’t help but take some sort sick satisfaction in at least that much.

"Let's talk." Baekhyun says quickly, eyes shifting down to study the ground, avoiding eye contact with the other. 

"Okay." 

He's lead into the apartment, shepherded into Chanyeol's room wordlessly. Baekhyun tries not to take notice but the apartment is a wreck; the dishes are piled high in the sink . Though not the tidiest person in the world, Chanyeol had never been like this before and it’s worrisome.

The room, though, is surprisingly clean. The bed is made, the floors clear of clothes. The whole room looks untouched and Baekhyun can’t help but blurt out his observation. He watches as Chanyeol’s face falls and his eyes turn down toward the floor. “I can’t stand being in this room,” He says, voice barely over a whisper that Baekhyun has to strain to hear, “It smells too much like you.”

“Oh.” Baekhyun mumbles and he continues to stand around awkwardly as Chanyeol goes to sit on the bed. The bedroom door is left wide open and it’s a gesture that stabs at Baekhyun’s heart.

“What do you want to talk about?” Chanyeol asks, slumping over as he sits on the bed. His eyes look up to Baekhyun and Baekhyun can see the weariness, the tired ache that sinks in bone-deep behind his gaze. "If it's about the time you saw me with Jongdae..." He trails off, gnawing at his lip the way he always does when he's trying to come up with something to say, when he's trying to come up with some lie. "I'm sorry, it was just... Just a heat of the moment kind of thing. I didn't mean to kiss him."

"You weren't making out with Jongdae." Baekhyun replies point blank and he sees Chanyeol's eyes quiver with fear. "I saw you."

"I-I don't know what you're talking about..." Chanyeol forces out a shaky laugh. "If I wasn't kissing him what else would I be doing?"

"Drinking blood." Baekhyun answers back, his eyes narrowed.

"Wha-- what?!" Chanyeol coughs out, his voice blasphemous. "Why would I do that? I cheated on you, Baekhyun. I'm sorry but can you just accept it so we can move on? You being in denial, acting as if I did something as illogical as drink blood... That's not normal!"

"Is this so bad that lying to me about cheating is a better alternative than the truth?" Baekhyun says incredulously, shaking his head slowly.

"Why do you think I'm lying? Please just accept--"

"You have fangs." He cuts in and Chanyeol immediately shuts up and shrinks back, a flicker of fear dancing in his eyes. "I've seen the blood transfusion packs from before and I saw you drinking from Jongdae. If it was something as simple as cheating, then this would be easy. I'd just leave and never come back. But I know this is something else, and that's why I'm here. To hear your explanation." Baekhyun swallows. “What are you?” He asks slowly, straight to the point.

Chanyeol locks his gaze with Baekhyun before dropping it to his twiddling fingers. “You won’t believe me.”

Under Chanyeol’s breath, Baekhyun swears he can make out the words: “You usually never do,” but that wouldn’t make sense. “Tell me.” He pushes as he crosses his arms.

“No.” Chanyeol says immediately and Baekhyun narrows his eyes.

“Tell me.” He repeats, stepping just a step closer to Chanyeol. 

Chanyeol stays quiet as his hands unclasp and go to grip his hair. Frustrated, he runs his hands harshly through his hair a couple of times before gripping the strands with all of his might.

“I really can’t, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol says softly, his voice strained. “I can’t afford to lose you.” Beneath his breath, Baekhyun swears he can hear Chanyeol end his sentence with the word “again.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun replies back and he knows he’s not being persuasive enough, not being soft enough to coax the answers out but he’s never been good at this kind of thing. Even when Chanyeol’s eyes flick up to look at him with a look of challenge, Baekhyun can’t do anything but weakly nod, hoping that maybe, just maybe, that’ll be enough reassurance.

“I love you.” Chanyeol whispers and Baekhyun’s face twists, his stomach immediately dropping in dread. Chanyeol only forces out a bitter laugh. “Sorry, that was a mean trick to pull but you can’t even offer me, promise me that much. How am I supposed to trust you with something like this?”

And it really is a stab at Baekhyun’s heart. He tries to force it out but the words gets trapped in his throat, mutating into a weird kind of inhumane sound instead of legitimate words. He shakes his head, giving up on the effort. “But that doesn’t have anything to do with this,” He says, trying to come up with a way to twist this into his own favour. “You’re the one saying that you love me, that you’ll wait for me forever, and you can’t even offer me this much. How am I supposed to requite your feelings if I don’t even know if they’re true.” And he feels absolutely disgusting for saying this, for twisting Chanyeol’s sweet promises into a weapon against him; the words leave a bitter taste in his mouth.

“That’s a low blow, Byun.” Chanyeol says and his eyes look so sad, so tired. “You know I’d do anything for you. I love you more than anything else in the world.”

“Then tell me this. If you’d do anything for me, then explain all of this to me.”

Chanyeol glances up to Baekhyun once again, his expression so conflicted, before he drops his gaze to the ground once again. “I can’t.” He says. Baekhyun only watches as Chanyeol presses his palms into the sockets of his eyes, pressing his fingertips into his head, and shaking his head repeatedly.

“Then do you really love me?” Baekhyun barks out a laugh and he hates himself for being like this, for trying to coerce Chanyeol like this, but it’s something he has to do. “Tell me.”

“I can’t.”

“Then was all of those ‘I love you’s’ that you told me, that you forced me to listen to until I was sobbing, begging you to stop. those were all lies? You can’t even do this much for someone you supposedly love?!”

“I ing can’t!” Chanyeol yells over Baekhyun’s raised voice.

And right before Baekhyun can say anything, push any further, Chanyeol’s gripping at his hair so hard in a way that looks painful, whispering “I can’t” over and over again like a mantra though the words seem to be more of a way to fill the air rather than an actual response.

It’s scaring him. Baekhyun has never seen him like this before, breaking down and crying, and he doesn’t know how to deal with him right now. He settles for stepping forward to rest a hand on Chanyeol’s shoulder in a way that Baekhyun hopes is comforting, soothing. It’s the wrong move. It becomes apparent when Chanyeol jerks away from the touch and leans down to cradle his head between his arms, rocking back and forth. 

Chanyeol is sweet, gentle. Easy going.

He’s the strong one. The rock in the relationship that is supposed to piece Baekhyun back together when he’s broken. Not the other way around.

Seeing him fall apart like this is terrifying. 

“I can’t tell you. I can’t. I love you so much, so much more than you’ll ever know but I can’t.” He says a bit louder, the words actually being directed at Baekhyun. “But I’m sorry, I can’t.” His voice is strained, almost cracking with the last words. He mumbles something else but the words are abruptly cut off with a soft hiccup. 

“Don’t hate me.” He picks up again, “I love you. Don’t leave me. Don’t leave me. Don’t leave me.” He rambles on, repeating the same three words and Baekhyun is frozen, guilty and unsure about what to do.

“It’s okay,” Baekhyun says after a while. Baekhyun has never been good at comforting people -- that’s always been Minseok’s job. He may not be the best, but he knows that at this point, it’d be best not to try to push anymore. He wraps his arms around Chanyeol and tucks him into his body. “It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me now.” He cooes and waits for Chanyeol’s tears to stop.

x    x    x

He’s avoiding the topic. He’s acting like nothing’s wrong, like Baekhyun didn’t see him break down right before his very eyes.

And Baekhyun doesn't want to be the one to instigate another one of those breakdowns. He'd like to say that he doesn't want to be the one to push. He doesn't want to be the one to force it when Chanyeol's been nothing but patient in their relationship.

But there's another reason, one that he's more hesitant to admit. 

He doesn’t know how he’s supposed to deal with it all, with dealing with Chanyeol’s breakdown or getting Chanyeol to finally trust him. So he doesn’t deal with any of it. 

They return to routine. Collecting their mail together, going out together, and sleeping together like everything is back to normal.

x    x    x

And Baekhyun’s not the most patient person in the world -- anyone could tell you that. He does try his best to steer clear of the issue, he truly does, but at some point, he can’t help himself anymore. The thought that Chanyeol’s hiding something from him, something big, the thought that Chanyeol can’t trust him eats away at his consciousness. 

So, for some peace of mind, he tries the topic once again. Slowly at first, just subtle comments, jibs, to hopefully get Chanyeol to admit something, or at least let something slip. None of it works, though. Chanyeol’s always successful in waving off the comments or pretending not to hear them.

And so Baekhyun begins to take a more direct approach, more direct questions in order to get Chanyeol to say something but again, it doesn’t do anything. It only becomes glaringly obvious that Chanyeol’s trying his best to ignore Baekhyun’s advances completely.

So that's when Baekhyun resorts to cornering Chanyeol into a wall, backing him into the intersection of the walls, and demanding an answer to the question that's been on his mind for much too long.

"Don't you think it's time you told me?" Baekhyun insists. Chanyeol's face only remains blank and unresponsive. "It's been long enough. Have I not proven my loyalty through choosing to stick by your side despite being knowingly being ing lied to?"

"I never lied to you." Chanyeol answers quietly, meekly. "I would never lie to you."

“But you never told me the truth and that’s just as bad.”

And Chanyeol keeps his mouth shut for just a second, worrying his bottom lip through his teeth and if he’s actually contemplating whether he should say. At least they’ve gotten to the point where Chanyeol is actually considering, not just avoiding it point-blank. At least to that extent, there’s some semblance of improvement. “Why do you need to know so badly?” Chanyeol asks, his voice just barely over a whisper.

“I want to know that you can trust me. That I can trust you.” Baekhyun answers directly and Chanyeol looks wounded.

And he opens his mouth, as if he’s ready to finally admit and just for a second, Baekhyun’s heart sores, begins to beat faster in anticipation. But then he snaps it shut, cutting himself off before he even begins. “I can’t.” He sighs, letting out a shaky breath. “I… It’s not the right time.”

And Baekhyun’s been tolerant with Chanyeol for so long, much too long, but something about the way that he says it rubs Baekhyun the wrong way.

“And when is it going to be the right time?” Baekhyun says, his voice carrying a tone of barely concealed accusation. “Will there ever be a ‘right’ time?”

“Stop asking!” Chanyeol yells and Baekhyun can only stumble a couple steps back at the sheer volume of it. 

Baekhyun can be patient. But only for so long. 

“Why?!” Baekhyun practically screams and he knows for a fact that Minseok can probably hear the muffled sounds from across the hall. “Why won’t you tell me?! Don’t you trust me enough to tell me about this?”

“This isn’t about trust. This is about for what’s best.” Chanyeol replies steadily, his voice a lot quieter than before but all the more terrifying.

“And since when do you decide what’s best?” Baekhyun growls.

Chanyeol’s silent, only peeking from below his bangs with a look of absolute fury. Baekhyun pays no mind as he continues, “You said yourself, you optimistic bastard. We're ing fated together. I'm not going to leave you.”

“It’s fate,” Chanyeol bites, his eyes trained on Baekhyun’s and Baekhyun can swear he sees a swirl of color spreading into Chanyeol’s eyes but it’s gone in a blink of the eye, probably just an illusion of the light. “It’s fate but it’s not supposed to ing happen this way. You’re not supposed to ing know and we are supposed to just get on with our goddamn lives, happily and in love. You don't know what happens when you deviate from the plan."

“This isn’t a game, Park.” He practically spits the name, “There’s no ing plan, no set way for this to go down. Get out of your head and stop with your preconceived notions about how I’m going to ing react!” 

"You don't understand," Chanyeol hisses, "I know what's going to happen."

"Really? Do you really now?" Baekhyun challenges as his eyes slant down, "Then you probably know that I'm not playing when I saw that I am done. I am done with you, with all of this ing nonsense if you don't tell me what's going on."

There's only pure, unadulterated fear in the look that Chanyeol gives Baekhyun but Baekhyun steels himself. This is the only way to get Chanyeol to explain.

"I'll give you three days." Baekhyun ends as he spins around and leaves the room, slamming the door on his way out.

x    x    x

There’s not a trace of Chanyeol for the next couple of days. And this does a number on Baekhyun’s nerves. He tries to pass it off, pretend it isn’t affecting him as much as he would care to admit but it’s pretty easy to see through his terrible facade. 

Baekhyun just flops around the apartment all day, only leaving the place periodically whenever he “thinks that the mail has come”. It’s a shoddy excuse for him to pace around the apartment building, scouring for any signs of Chanyeol or even Jongdae, but Baekhyun seems to think it actually works nonetheless.

“You need to get your mind off of this.” Minseok says just as Baekhyun’s about to “check on the mail” for the 5th time that day.

Baekhyun freezes and slowly turns around, a smile coupled with a crazed expression plastered over his face. “What- What are you talking about? Get my mind off of what?”

Minseok and Lu Han exchange a look before cornering Baekhyun, both weaving one of their arms into his own to lock him into place. “C’mon, let’s go get some coffee.” Minseok urges and begins to lead the way out of the apartment and down the stairs.

“But,” Baekhyun stammers, his eyes obviously trailing along the closed door of the neighbouring apartment, “I have to check the mail.”

“It’ll still be there when we come back,” Minseok says before he gives Baekhyun one last jerk that has him breaking his gaze with the other apartment. 

 

The cafe is far enough that they have to take Lu Han’s car, a beat up blue Hyundai that he calls his “baby”. Baekhyun is disgusted but not nearly as disgusted as he is when he discovers an odd crusting white stain on the gray suede of the backseat. He doesn’t ask; some things are better left unknown.

It takes a grand total of fifteen minutes to arrive and it’s not bad, per say, but Baekhyun can’t help but skeptically compare it to the one he usually goes to with Chanyeol. 

The ambience is completely different, this one seeming more geared toward couples and teenage girls with it’s all white furniture and bright pastel coloured chinaware. It’s far bigger the other one, replacing the cozy, homely atmosphere for one that’s far more industrial, less personal with how it’s all about churning out sweet concoctions than brewing quality coffee.

He follows Minseok and Lu Han to a table meant for four and settles down as Minseok then scurries toward the counter. “I’ll order the coffee,” Minseok says before he leaves.

“I didn’t even say what I wanted.” Baekhyun shakes his head, muttering to himself.

Immediately, Lu Han pulls out his phone and starts playing some kind of app. He tilts the screen just the slightest bit toward Baekhyun so that he watches Lu Han move his dragon across multiple lanes of traffic with ease. Oddly, it’s fairly interesting to watch as Lu Han gains on his high score (727) and eventually surpasses it  with each flick of his thumb. He’s fast approaching the 800s actually when Minseok returns, hands fumbling over the three cups of coffee, and Baekhyun watches in horror as Lu Han purposely throws his dragon into a car and puts his phone down to help Minseok.

“This is for you,” Minseok smiles as he hands over a mug filled to the brim with whipped cream and chocolate syrup. It’s amazing how he doesn’t manage to spill it despite how the drink threatens to slosh over the edge with each movement.

“What is it?” Baekhyun asks skeptically, accepting the mug nonetheless. 

“Why don’t you try it?”

Baekhyun only takes a sip before he’s practically spitting out the offending liquid. “You call this coffee?” He chokes out as he tries to clear his mouth of that taste of what he’s pretty sure is pure sugar.

Minseok only shrugs, a little smug smile threatening to break out on his face, and Lu Han has taken hold of Baekhyun’s “coffee” and is now greedily gulping it down.

Baekhyun frowns. “That’s disgusting,” He grimaces. 

“I think it’s good.” Lu Han argues, the slight curve of his lips just barely visible behind the lip of the mug. 

“You guys are a match made in heaven.” Baekhyun shakes his head, cracking a tiny smile of his own that has Minseok’s face brightening instantly.

“You finally smiled,” Minseok whispers and Baekhyun’s face falls for just a second before it’s plastered over with another facade, but a second is just enough for Minseok to read his face, his feelings as easily as he would a book.

“What are you talking about?” He laughs nervously, playing up the smile until it’s almost fake. “I’ve been smiling.”

Minseok gives him a look, “You don’t have to pretend this doesn’t hurt.”

They stare at each other just for a second, engaging in some kind of emotional staredown before Baekhyun lets up. “It’s okay. I’m okay. It’ll be over soon enough. Just a couple more hours and this will all be over.” He mumbles the last part almost as an afterthought and he’s surprised when Minseok actually says something.

“It doesn’t have to be.” Minseok says before dropping his eyes to his mug of coffee.

The tension’s broken whenever Lu Han somehow ends up knocking his (Baekhyun’s) cup of coffee all over the table. Baekhyun jumps out of his seat, yelling “!” a little louder than necessary and gaining a couple of worried glances from others in the coffee shop. He swears a couple more times as Lu Han lunges at him with a fistful of napkins, insistently rubbing at the hot coffee that’s slowly beginning to seep through the denim of his jeans. “Stop it,” He grumbles, snatching the napkins from Lu Han to clean up himself. “Just focus on cleaning the table. I’m going to the--” Baekhyun falters when he catches Lu Han’s eyes, when he notices the sharp look in Lu Han’s gaze. Something makes Baekhyun think that maybe Lu Han wasn’t as clumsy as he thought.

“You’re going where?” Minseok asks and immediately, Baekhyun can see Lu Han’s face soften when Minseok glances over at him. 

“To the bathroom.” Baekhyun finishes and scurries away to find it.

He’s never been in the coffee shop before but it doesn’t take very long to find it. It’s a one-staller and he’s lucky that no one else has snagged it just yet. There’s really not much he can do at this point apart from wiping the affected area down with water, hoping that his thigh won’t be too too sticky, but that doesn’t stop him from hanging out in the bathroom. Grabbing a handful of towels to futilely dab at the stain -- his pants are doomed to be coffee-stained for the rest of the day, he knows that -- as he leans up against the wall. From the look Lu Han gave him earlier, he knows it’s best to just avoid the older for a bit instead of trying to weather out the storm.

He really didn’t mean to sadden Minseok. Minseok just needs to face reality. And Lu Han needs to express himself in ways that don’t involve purposefully spilling hot beverages on a person.

A knock on the door has Baekhyun scrambling off the wall. “Someone’s in here!” Baekhyun calls out, rushing to dispose of his wads of paper towels.

“Let me in,” is the response and it takes a while for Baekhyun to recognize the voice as Lu Han’s.

“I’m sorry, I don’t let strangers into the bathroom,” Baekhyun deadpans, joking as a way of testing the waters.

“Let me in.” Lu Han repeats and Baekhyun moves to do so.

“Hello there,” He tries as Lu Han slips through the now-unlocked door before closing it. Locking it. “Fancy meeting you here. Not the optimal place for male bonding but whatever.”

Lu Han is not amused, narrowing his gaze as Baekhyun begins to rattle off. “Stop being like this.” He says, crossing his arms.

“I’m sorry, I’m just naturally pleasant.”

“Stop it.” Lu Han says, “Stop doing this. It hurts him, you know.”

Baekhyun considers making another joke; that is, after all, his go-to coping mechanism. He decides against it when he sees the hard line of Lu Han’s mouth. “It shouldn’t hurt him,” He says instead, “It has nothing to do with him.”

“And that’s what hurts him the most. The fact that you think that everything you do, everything you say is none of his business. The fact that you don’t feel as if you you can confide in him anymore.”

“And I’ll say it again. I shouldn’t have to confide in him. This doesn’t have anything to do with him.”

Lu Han gives him an incredulous look for a second before exhaling, letting loose a long string of Mandarin under his breath. Baekhyun, with his 3 years of high school Mandarin under his belt, can only make out the words ‘you’, ‘idiot’, and ‘damn on your second uncle’, but he can guess the rest from context. 

Baekhyun opens his mouth to retort but Lu Han cuts him off, “I’m not going to argue with you. But you, your emotions, your wellbeing affects him more than you think.”

And with that, Lu Han slips back out of the bathroom.

It takes him just a bit longer to work up the courage to do it, but eventually Baekhyun returns to the table. He comes back just in time to hear Lu Han say, “The bastard was like ting in there or something.”

“What are you talking about?” Baekhyun asks as he scoots into the opposite side of the booth.

“You.” Minseok replies with a grin, “Well, more specifically how you were taking too long in the bathroom.” He then turns to Lu Han, elbowing him in the rib. “Go, now’s your chance.”

“Nah. I’m good.” Lu Han says without breaking eye-contact with Baekhyun. “It should be fine now.”

Minseok looks a little perturbed by the answer. “You… sure?”

Lu Han gives one last little glare at Baekhyun before turning back to Minseok with a bright smile. “Positive. You want me to go get some more coffee?”

Minseok nods enthusiastically. “Yeah, that’d be great.” He glances over to Baekhyun, “And make sure to get the super bitter one that Baekhyun likes so much.”

 

Whenever Lu Han finally comes back with more coffee, they lapse back into conversation about really anything. Minseok keeps trying to loop it back to Chanyeol, though and Baekhyun notices right away; it’d be difficult not to. He just brushes the topics off at the first mention, sometimes offering some noncommittal answers and other times just straight ignoring the comments. 

Baekhyun also doesn’t miss the scowls that Lu Han gives him every time he does this, but he finds he doesn’t really care.

Somewhere in the middle of their conversation, Baekhyun’s phone goes off and he freezes. He hasn’t checked but he feels like it’s Chanyeol; he knows it’s Chanyeol. A quick glance at his phone only confirms his suspicions.

Abruptly, he stands up, practically knocking the chair back as he does so. “I have to go.” Baekhyun announces and he’s scrambling to gather his things, shoving his phone back into his pocket and throwing on his jacket.

“What?” Minseok asks, putting a pause on his story as he watches Baekhyun up in confusion. “Where are you going?”  

“I just,” Baekhyun says distractedly, already rushing to the door. “Chanyeol.” He says quickly and with that he’s leaving the coffee shop, sprinting back to the apartment.

He doesn’t seem to notice the footsteps behind him, even as they grow faster and faster, closer and closer. Only when there’s a grip on his arm, pulling him to a stop does he notice that Lu Han had been chasing him.

“Let me go!” Baekhyun huffs, trying his best to pull his wrist from the surprisingly strong grip of Lu Han. “I need to go!”

“Just,” Lu Han pauses to catch his breath. “Just don’t it up. For me. For us. For Minseok.”

There’s so much emotion behind his eyes and Baekhyun can’t help but look away. “I’ll try.” And he adds as an after thought, “No promises.”

He rips his arm out of Lu Han’s grip and runs off.

 

As soon as he reaches Chanyeol’s apartment, he stops himself from immediately knocking on the door. Instead, he takes a couple of minutes to catch his breath, to fix his disheveled self. He had run back all the way from the cafe. And all the way up the stairs. But Chanyeol doesn’t need to know that. That would look desperate and Baekhyun’s not desperate. He’s the one who offered Chanyeol the ultimatum.

(But he is. He’s so desperate. He can’t let Chanyeol let him go. He can’t let Chanyeol walk out of his life all because he was too rash, too impatient.)

He runs his hands through his hair a couple of time, trying to look presentable, before knocking. He knocks about three times before the door swings open to reveal Chanyeol. 

“Come in,” Chanyeol instructs. Completely bypassing any kind of greeting or other social niceties.

Baekhyun does just that, quickly toeing off his shoes before entering the apartment. As soon as he realizes that the apartment is in the same terrible condition as it was the other day, he makes his way to Chanyeol’s room and Chanyeol meekly follows him. “This is your house. Why am I the one leading us in here?” Baekhyun jokes, hoping to somehow ease the tension, but the dead silence from behind him only discourages him. 

When they reach the bedroom, Baekhyun walks into the middle of it and turns around. Out of habit, he expects Chanyeol to move back to close the door but he doesn’t and for some reason, the open door bothers him more than it ever has before. This time, Baekhyun takes it upon himself to walk over to the door and push it closed. He returns back to his original position soon enough. “Are you ready to tell me now?” He asks, straight to the point.

“Look, Baekhyun,” Chanyeol sighs and he doesn’t even have the courtesy to look into Baekhyun’s eyes as he speaks. “I know what you said but I just don’t think that this is the best time for me to explain all of this. I just feel that this is something extraordinarily private, this isn’t something you tell just anyone.”

And Baekhyun doesn’t mean to put his barks out a mirthless laugh. “You’re the one who was telling me how we were meant to be forever. Am I really ‘just anyone?’”

There’s a look of desperation in Chanyeol’s eyes, of trepidation and utter uncertainty as to how to respond. “And what if me never telling you is the only way for us to live out that forever?”

“Than there’s something wrong with your grand plan. There’s no way I can pledge my forever to someone who can’t even tell me the truth.”

“But what if it’s--”

“I have an idea about what you are, about what all of this is,” Baekhyun cuts in. Even without Chanyeol voicing out his complete thought, he knows that it’s just going to be some excuse to not tell him what’s happening. “I just need to hear confirmation. I just need to know the exact reason why you’re drinking ing blood, for the sake of my sanity.”

And it seems that cussing is the wrong way to go with the way that Chanyeol seems to flinch at the words.

“Isn’t it better to remain in a state of uncertainty?” is Chanyeol’s half-hearted argument. “That way you’re suspended in a situation where the best possible outcome and the worst possible outcome, they’re all equally as likely.”

“You tell me, wouldn’t it be better to get some peace of mind? To finally be able to eliminate the chances of worst case scenario completely?”

“And what if it is the worst case scenario?” Chanyeol counters.

“Is it the worst case scenario?

“I don’t know. I can’t tell what your worst case scenario is.”

Baekhyun only blinks at him through squinted eyes. “Chanyeol.” He says, punctuating the name. “Literally shut up. I can tell what you’re trying to do here. You are not going to manage to shake me off, of distracting me from the matter at hand.”

“I’m not trying to.” Chanyeol amends his words as Baekhyun raises a brow at what he just said. “Okay. So maybe I was. But I don’t think you understand. I do trust you, I really do, but I… I just don’t want to up this relationship.”

“You already ed up our relationship, if you haven’t noticed already.” He points out.

“Yes, but I’ve ed up worse, for so many more because of this one thing and I… I don’t know. It’s scary for me, really, and I know you’re frustrated but I really think that maybe we should wait. Wait for our relationship to become more stable. Wait for--”

“Damn it, Chanyeol,” Baekhyun interrupts, “I know you did not just call me over to tell me to back out of this.”

“But it’s just--” Chanyeol stamers.

“I love you.” Baekhyun blurts out and he doesn’t know where it comes from, what filter finally switched off in his brain, but it’s out there before he can stop himself.

"I love you," Baekhyun repeats softly, swallowing back the heavy taste of his words as he watches as what he just said dawn on Chanyeol. As the words sink in, Chanyeol’s pitiful expression lets up as his eyes widen with surprise and just a little bit of fear. Inching just a bit closer, Baekhyun ducks Chanyeol head down and lifts his own head to connect their foreheads. “I love you, you ing idiot.” He swallows, trying to keep the nerves at bay, “Don’t make me regret this.” 

There’s so much fear, so much confusion in Chanyeol expression before his eyes drift close and he inhales. He pushes Baekhyun back lightly, leaving just about a foot of distance between them before slowly lifting his eyelids.

Baekhyun gasps.

It’s pretty, Baekhyun thinks as he watches the red diffuse in Chanyeol’s eyes. Sourcing from the black of the pupil, it spreads quickly, filling the usual near-ebony irises with the colour of blood. It’s frightening, to be perfectly honest, but Baekhyun suppresses his instincts to run and steps closer to close the gap between them.

There’s only the sound of their breaths that fill the air as Baekhyun begins to press into Chanyeol, trapping him between the wall and his own body. He lifts his hand to Chanyeol’s neck, fitting his hand on against to the sharp of the jaw and using the fingertip of his thumb to grace over Chanyeol’s lips. He prompts them open by slowly pushing his thumb between the lips and Chanyeol reluctantly obeys, unhinging his jaw for Baekhyun to peer in.

Sure enough, there’s the uncanny sight of sharpened canines and with a shaky finger, Baekhyun begins to feel the teeth. On accident, he pricks the pad of his finger on one of the sharp points and draws the smallest bit of blood. He immediately hears the sharp intake of breath from Chanyeol.

As if scalded, Baekhyun retreats his hand to his side and takes a step back. “So you are a… vampire?”

“That’s a crude description; it’s far simpler than that, not as many stereotypes as what that word calls for. But yeah.” Chanyeol breathes out. “I drink blood and I live forever.”

Baekhyun really just wants to laugh. He wants to double over and laugh at the absolute absurdity of it all. His previous lover had left him at the first opportunity of normalcy, at someone better. His next had promised to never leave him but ended up being a damned vampire. Just his luck.

He doesn’t express any of this, though, instead subtly moving his hand down to the denim of his pants and pressing his pricked finger into the fabric to staunch the bleeding.

Chanyeol seems to take notice of the action in the way that his face falls. “I-- It doesn’t affect me, you know. I can control it.” He says dejectedly and his eyes look tired-- lifeless almost.

Baekhyun only hums, not sure what’s appropriate to say in these kinds of situations and an uneasy silence befalls over them. He hates how tense Chanyeol is, hates how he seems to be just waiting for Baekhyun to run off, but most off all, he hates how he doesn’t know how to reassure Chanyeol that he’s not going to leave -- not now, not ever. 

“Baek, I--”

“Chanyeol--”

They say at the same time, both obviously finding the quiet absolutely unbearable. “You go first.” Baekhyun says with a small smile, using his hand to gesture for Chanyeol to go on.

And Chanyeol looks like he’s going to protest and let Baekhyun go first, but he only clamps his mouth shut, swallowing back the lump in his throat before trying again. “I understand if you want to leave. I get it. I-I," He stutters on his words; he has to swallow past the lump in his throat before he can proceed. "I'm a freak of nature, a monster. I'm not normal. I get it. You have my full permission to just leave and act like you never met me if... If you feel disgusted or betrayed by me."

“I’m not going to leave.” Baekhyun says before Chanyeol can say anything else.

“Are you not scared?”

Baekhyun forces out a laugh. “I’m a writer. I can’t be scared by things like this kind of thing, right?”  

“But this isn’t a fantasy. This is reality. This is different.” Chanyeol presses on, a look of concern flickering through his eyes.

“I’m not scared of you.” Baekhyun answers solemnly. He hopes his voice isn’t coming out as shaky as it sounds in his head because he means it. He means every single word. How could he ever be scared of Chanyeol? “I’m just...” He inhales, stalling for time to come up with the correct word, the correct phrasing to describe his current state of being. “I’m overwhelmed." He settles on but as soon as he says it, he already knows that it's not the right thing to say.

Chanyeol seems to deflate. "Okay. That’s understandable. It’s a lot to take in.”

“For what it’s worth, it’s not like this was all of a sudden. I saw a lot of things and I kind of formulated a guess similar to this on my own.” Baekhyun in a breath as his eyes focus on Chanyeol’s. “It’s just… Overwhelming to see that something that’s supposed to be fiction actually exists.”

A side of Chanyeol’s mouth quirks up in a half-smile. “I mean, the stories had to come from somewhere, right?”

“So are you saying that zombies also exists?”

“What? No. That’s just preposterous.” Chanyeol shakes his head, eyebrows furrowed in a way that seems much too serious. His expression relaxes back to normal when Baekhyun starts to laugh. “I’m sorry, though.” He apologizes, and Baekhyun’s stopped laughing as abruptly as he began.

“What’s to be sorry about? You finally told me. That’s what I wanted, what I tried to force out of you all of this time, isn’t it?” Baekhyun shrugs, trying to pass off with an air of nonchalance, of aloofness. Like he’s not affected by any of this. 

“Maybe I should’ve tried harder to stop you from knowing. I shouldn’t have been convinced so easily. You’d be angry at me, sure, but at least you wouldn’t be scared of me.”

“I’m not scared of you!” Baekhyun insists.

“Maybe you’re not scared but you’re not as comfortable as before. That much I can tell.” Chanyeol shakes his head and then, more to himself than anything else, he murmurs, “I ed up. I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have told.”

“You shouldn't be sorry. You didn't up. If anything, things probably would've taken a turn for the worse had you refused to tell me." And in a small voice, Baekhyun decides to add, "I was serious about leaving you were you not to tell me, you know."

Chanyeol grimaces, "I'm sorry about that too. That I lied to you."

"Before, you were saying how you didn’t lie and now you’re saying you did. What’s with the change of heart?”

"Because I did. Because I hid an important truth and that's just as bad."

“You didn't lie to me." Baekhyun shrugs, "You can't lie to me if I never even asked. If I was too afraid to even ask." And with that, he’s reaching up on his tiptoes, loosely looping his arms around Chanyeol’s neck as he aligns himself with the contours of Chanyeol’s body. 

Chanyeol’s own arms moves to wrap around Baekhyun’s waist, moving him just a bit closer. “I love you.” He says with a crooked smile.

And though he had managed to say it earlier, Baekhyun still balks at the idea of answering when it’s posed so directly. When it’s expected like this. He’s hesitant. Hesitant to answer; hesitant to commit. The reply comes out anyways. Baekhyun let’s go of Chanyeol, lets the younger be the one supporting him as he cups Chanyeol’s face, gently thumbing at the soft skin of the cheeks. “I love you too.” Baekhyun answers back, voice just barely audible but it’s enough. 

 

Baekhyun spends the night but for the most part, they just talk. They take the time to clarify the reality of things, to clear up any of the misconceptions Baekhyun has about all of this.

“Can I just,” Baekhyun begins uncertainly, looking down as he wrings his hands together, “Can I just ask you some questions about all this? It’s… it’s a lot to take in.”

“Yeah,” Chanyeol nods slowly, “It is a lot to take in but hey,” He reaches over to tilt Baekhyun’s chin up so that their gazes meet. He cracks a smile, “You’re doing better than before.”

“Before?” Baekhyun asks curiously.

Chanyeol stops for a second, trying to figure out exactly what Baekhyun is questioning. “Oh.” He says once he’s figured it out. He shakes his head. “I meant all the other times. Like your reaction is better than some of the other people I’ve told.”

“How many people have you told?”

“Many.” Chanyeol answers vaguely but Baekhyun gives him a look as to elaborate. “I don’t know. I’ve lost count but they’ve all… They’ve all passed on.”

Baekhyun inhales sharply. “Oh.” 

“Except Jongdae,” He rushes to list an exception, “I think he’s the only one of this time that knows. Apart from you now.”

“‘Of this time’,” Baekhyun repeats, “Just… Just how long have you been around?”

 “A long time” is Chanyeol’s solemn answer and raises his fingers to count off. “Since about 1073, if I remember correctly.

“Damn.” Baekhyun breathes out, “That’s a long time.” And that’s all he says because he really doesn’t know how he -- how anyone follows up with that.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Chanyeol asks and Baekhyun immediately nods. Unnecessarily, Chanyeol leans over and presses his ears to the shell of Baekhyun’s ear in a way that makes him shiver. “I’m the hyung in this relationship.”

And that has Baekhyun cracking up into laughter, Chanyeol quickly following until they’re both clutching their stomachs in pain.

“So… That explains the garlic thing, then?” Baekhyun jokes, going along with the sudden break in tension. 

“The… garlic thing? What garlic th-- Oh.” Chanyeol makes a face, “No, that’s just a personal taste. That stuff is disgusting.”

Baekhyun laughs and then pulls a look of fake disgust. “You don’t like garlic? I’m-- I’m sorry but I think this is the end of our relationship.”

He means it as a joke but Chanyeol’s not laughing. Instead, he’s watching Baekhyun carefully, as if he’s afraid that Baekhyun will flee at any second. “It was a joke.” Baekhyun clarifies and Chanyeol barks out an awkward sounding laugh.

“Too soon?” Baekhyun asks softly.

“Too soon.” Chanyeol confirms but cracks a smile. “But at the same time, it wasn’t soon enough.”

 

A night isn’t enough to go over the intricacies of Chanyeol’s existence, not nearly enough. So at a certain point, they make the collective decision to just stop. It's too much to share every last detail about his hundreds of years of life so they fall asleep with Chanyeol's promise of answering anything, everything that Baekhyun asks.

x    x    x

It’s not what you’d expect; it’s not difficult to transition to dating a supernatural being. 

And maybe it has something to do with the idea that Baekhyun is used to the world of the unknown, takes comfort in imagining what lies beyond the human scope of understanding.

Maybe it also has something to do with the fact that he loves Chanyeol. Loves him more than enough to let something like this wedge between them.

It takes a little while, but soon, sooner than you’d expect, everything pretty much goes back to normal. Falls back into the same kind of schedule as before.

Except this time, it’s not Chanyeol hiding. It’s not Chanyeol flinching at any and every word that might possibly allude to what he really is. It’s not Chanyeol living in fear of his secret being found out.

Instead, it’s Baekhyun helping Chanyeol retrieve the packets of blood from Jongdae. It’s Baekhyun hesitating just a bit, but ultimately reaching over and dabbing at the blood that stains Chanyeol's mouth after a meal. It's eventually Baekhyun cutting out the need for Jongdae; it’s letting, trusting Chanyeol enough to drink the red straight from him. 

It’s Baekhyun asking about every little detail of Chanyeol’s life, of his existence.

It’s every night where they reserve a time for Baekhyun to ask just one question about Chanyeol, whether it be about what he is (which he doesn’t know all that much about, anyways), about who he is, about who he was.

And it might seem a bit useless to ask for just a single answer every night but it's enough. Because as the days go by, as the months add up, the information bides up, spins itself into an intricate story that Baekhyun still doesn't know the ending to. Will probably never know the ending to.

Through the nights, he learns that Chanyeol doesn't really remember how he became like this. He learns that Chanyeol was an ordinary human, once, way back when in the Koryo dynasty. Back when his family (whose faces, whose voices he can no longer recall) was struggling to get by on his father's meager salary as an artisan. Back when he was sent to be learned, to train to be a scholar because that was his father's dream. Back when he had become a scholar, worked his way into the house of royalty, and then forced down onto the bed of the crown prince. Back when he was discovered in the chambers the prince. Back when the prince’s fiance found him lying limp and in bed and promptly disposed of him.

Baekhyun learns that the next thing Chanyeol knew, he was in a ditch, bruises painting his body black and blue and a long thin scar across the expanse of his throat. He learns that overtime, the scar had faded into nothing, left not a trace.

He learns that the first time Chanyeol drank, he cried. That he still cries when remembering. That he hadn’t meant to the human dry, but he was hungry. So hungry that he lost control, ended up killing the woman who had been kind enough to stop to ask if he needed some food or a place to sleep. Baekhyun learns that Chanyeol's jaws had snapped around her neck before she could even finish her sentence.

He learns that Chanyeol's had a long history with Jongdae's family. That somewhere way back when, he had befriended Jongdae's great-great-great grandfather. That through Chanyeol's generous donations to the man when he was going through a hard time left the family line supposedly indebted to Chanyeol and since then, they've always helped Chanyeol procure blood someway or another. 

He learns that the Chanyeol had been aware of Baekhyun getting suspicious. That once the fridge incident occurred, he had relocated the blood transfusion packs to the freezer, sealed in a frozen dinner package way in the back. He learns that trying to freeze blood wasn't the best thing to do, that freezing the blood, especially without any previous preparation or preservatives, for such a long time compromised the integrity of the blood. That the reason why he got sick was because he still drank it anyways, had to still drink it because Jongdae couldn’t afford to get him something fresher. That the reason why he got sicker around Baekhyun's presence was because he refused to drink with him near, refused to run the risk of being found out.

But most importantly, he learns about Chanyeol's past lives, past loves. He hasn't heard them all, probably not even a significant number of them since Chanyeol's been around for such a long time, but something in the way that Chanyeol tells the story, details the scene makes it all so vivid, makes it feel like Baekhyun's been there, been through it all before. Each lover seems to have their own unique story, unique moments and Baekhyun is adamant on learning every single little detail. 

0    0    0

Sometime, after a substantial amount of time, Chanyeol finally shows Baekhyun the final thing he’s been hiding.

“I have something to show you.” Chanyeol says randomly as he sits up when they’re cuddling on the bed, Baekhyun balled up to Chanyeol’s side. 

“What is it?” is Baekhyun’s sleepy response as he wraps his arms around Chanyeol’s waist, trying to use his weight as leverage to keep Chanyeol from sitting up. It doesn’t work, though, and Chanyeol is soon using Baekhyun’s grip against him to heave him off the bed. “Chanyeol,” Baekhyun whines, drawing out the finishing syllable. “Do we have to do this now?”

“Now,” Chanyeol affirms 

“It’s late though, can’t this wait until morning?” Baekhyun whines, but it’s already too late because Chanyeol is already hauling him up to his feet and wrapping his fingers around Baekhyun’s wrist.

“Now,” Chanyeol reaffirms and then grins, “Don’t worry, this’ll be good.” 

Baekhyun doesn’t see where they’re going, too busy rubbing the bleariness from his eyes, but he knows from memory that they’re approaching the room’s closet. It’s when he hears a rustle of clothes and the distinctive sound of clothes hangers being pushed away that he knows something’s up. “What are you--” He stops and closes his mouth. “What. The. .”

Chanyeol steps directly in front of Baekhyun, blocking his view of the wall. He tries to peer around Chanyeol to get a better look but it doesn’t work very well with Chanyeol’s superior height and insistence to obstruct Baekhyun’s view. “What is that?” Baekhyun says, finally giving up on trying to sneak a peek and opting for a more blunt way of gaining information.

“You know how I’ve been around for a while?”

“For a while? You mean hundreds of years?” Baekhyun snorts, lifting a hand to squeeze at one of Chanyeol’s cheek, “Where are the wrinkles? This is unfair.”

Chanyeol grins, “Yeah well I want to show you something.”

“You said that like three minutes ago when you so rudely awoke me,” Baekhyun rolls his eyes, shifting his hand down to linger on Chanyeol’s neck. “What is it?” He asks, his voice softer.

“So I’ve had a lot of lovers in my lifetime.” Chanyeol starts. Baekhyun’s silent and Chanyeol takes this as prompting to keep going. “And I have pictures of all of them -- or at least for the ones that I had when cameras were a thing. I have drawings for the ones that go back older than that.”

Baekhyun narrows his eyes, “Is this some sick way of making me jealous?” He deadpans and Chanyeol’s face falls.

“What? No I just--” Chanyeol stops himself when he sees Baekhyun’s shoulders shake with laughter. “Why do you have to be like this? This is really cool, I swear,” He pouts.

“I know it’s cool. That’s why I want you to move out of the way so I can see it!” Baekhyun lightly pushes Chanyeol out of the way and Chanyeol lets himself stumble out of the way.

“Patient as always, I see,” He laughs as he relocates himself to Baekhyun’s side, slinging a lanky arm over Baekhyun’s shoulders. 

Unlike usual, Baekhyun doesn’t bother with an eye roll or snarky remark; he’s too busy looking at all the pictures. Saying there’s a lot of pictures in an understatement -- there’s hundreds. 

There doesn’t seem to be any logical order to the arrangement of the photos, just haphazardly stuck up on the wall so that there’s a weathered photo that looks like some relic from the 1800s pinned up next to a far more recent one. Near the sides are the drawings of people. Some crumpled, some where the lines have faded to only a faint outline of what it once was. 

“You could arrange them based on date,” Baekhyun suggests, turning toward Chanyeol. “That would be pretty cool.”

With a hand gripping at Baekhyun’s chin, Chanyeol so kindly positions Baekhyun’s face back to look at the collage. “Yeah maybe,” He brushes off, giving the cheeks a short little squeeze with his fingers, “But what else do you see?”

“That…” Baekhyun stares at the pictures, determined to figure out exactly what Chanyeol wants him to see. “You have a type. apparently.” He finishes amusedly when he begins to notice that there are indeed similarities between all of Chanyeol’s companions: short, slight, and reserved compared to their energetic counterpart, but bright-eyed and happy nonetheless. 

Chanyeol laughs. “Close, but not exactly what I’m trying to get at.” 

“What am I supposed to be looking at? Give me a hint…” Baekhyun whines as he continues to glean over the many pictures.

“Describe my type.” are the only words that Chanyeol offers as a hint.

“Well that’s a ty hint,” Baekhyun rolls his eyes but begins to anyways. “Okay well they’re all--” He cuts himself off. “Oh my god.”

“You got it?” 

Baekhyun is not looking at Chanyeol’s face but he can practically see the amused smirk on his face. “I… I-- Oh my god! Are they…” Baekhyun draws in a sharp breath, his eyes searching through the photos, catching on the similar features of Chanyeol’s many partners. There are slight alterations but for the most part, all of Chanyeol’s partner have the same small hooded eyes, white, porcelain skin, and button nose. All of Chanyeol’s partners have the same features that seem eerily familiar. “There’s no way...” He trails off, his eyes wide and unbelieving.

“Yeah,” Chanyeol breathes out, “They’re all you. Different lifetimes. Same soul.” Chanyeol steals a glance at Baekhyun, silently egging him on to say something. Anything. Baekhyun can see the uncertainty settle into Chanyeol’s features as the corners of his mouth begin to turn down. “Baekhyun?” He calls out hesitantly.

“How?” Baekhyun finally answers after a beat of silence. “This is amazing. How did you do this?”

A smile, a bashful one at that, returns to Chanyeol. “For years, for lifetimes, you are the one I seek out.”

Baekhyun, in turn, immediately blurts out the first thing that comes to mind. “But why? Don’t you get tired of all of this?”

“I won’t say that we always get our happy ending; that would be a lie. There are times where you leave.” Chanyeol’s face twists into a wry smile, “You usually leave as soon as I reveal myself.” There’s a sharp intake of breath from Baekhyun.

“Is that why before you were so--” Baekhyun stops himself. He already knows the answer to that question. “How many times?”

“I can’t say. I’ve lost count. After a certain number of times, I had just stopped telling you altogether. That seemed to work the best.” 

“I’m sorry.” Baekhyun apologizes quietly. “I’m so sorry.”

Chanyeol shrugs it off, “But that doesn’t matter. what matters is that you’re here now.”

“And I’ll be here forever.” Baekhyun adds softly. His words take a while to sink in in Chanyeol’s brain but as soon as they do, Chanyeol steps toward him, closing the gap between them. He snakes one arm around Baekhyun’s waist, the other behind his head, and he presses in for a kiss. 

“I love you.” Chanyeol whispers against Baekhyun’s lips.

And his answer comes without hesitation. “I love you too.” Baekhyun replies, the words sliding right off of his tongue just as he goes back in to connect their lips.

Neither of them try to deepen the kiss, both content with the slow, languid nature of it. When they finally pull apart, there’s a silly grin plastered on Baekhyun’s face as his arms move down to wrap around Chanyeol’s neck.

“So maybe we really are soulmates...” Baekhyun thoughtlessly muses as he turns to give another look over the multitude of pictures with variations of the features he sees every day in the mirror.

He doesn’t think much of his comment until he finds Chanyeol staring -- no, more like feels the weight of Chanyeol’s gaze over the profile of his face. He immediately turns back to Chanyeol, misjudging the close proximity they are in together and almost bumping noses. Immediately, he shifts back, arms dropping to his side and breaking from Chanyeol’s grip, so that there’s an acceptable distance between them.

He means to ask Chanyeol what he’s looking at or if he’s has something on his face or something to that degree but he stops when he sees, really sees the way Chanyeol is looking at him: jaw slackened, mouth slightly ajar, and pure adoration painted over his face.

There’s something else though, behind his eyes there’s a look of nostalgia, of reminiscence.

Chanyeol wordlessly moves to link their hands, intertwining their fingers until their palms are pressed up against each other.

“Maybe.” 

 

.