the start .2

EXODUS ( unfinished )
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kris would always visit the little kid , he watched when the villagers mobbed him and his grandma thinking that they are modern witches , come on its the 20th century kris thought he wanted to help , but he couldnt.... the little boy ran as fast as he could remembering the words of his grandma before those mean villagers killed her... run as fast as you could never look back..... and thats what he did... kris followed him just to make sure he is safe he was running for more than 3 hours now he could not take it anymore so he collapsed in the middle of the forest... and for the first time ever kris didnt hold back he scooped the boy up and placed him in the nearby river and watched over him as a man together with his little boy with cute chubby face and almond eyes found him , he watched as they took him in their house , he watched as the cute chubby boy talked to the sleeping figure saying that he will be his brother.... "minseokkie will protect you now , minseokkie is strong so wake up now so you and minseokkie can go out and play with minseokkies friends , you are minseokkies baby brother now." ah... what a cute boy! kris felt that his little man is safe with the chubby boy so he left them , because he has to... and he knows he will come back later anyway..
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kikaynikkay
i dont think its good.. please tell me if i should continue or what...thanks!!!!

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yomiyomiyomi #1
Chapter 4: Am I too late to give a review? TT
Well, you should continue your story. Don't be afraid not to post the next chapter just because you're thinking no one might appreciate it. Write for yourself. Don't pressure yourself pleasing others. :)
As for this story, you might want to really lengthen each chapters more and capitalize letters if needed (if the word is a proper noun). And don't hesitate to put more spaces (by spaces I mean the type of spaces when you hit the 'Enter' button) and always remember to use proper punctuation marks because the readers might get confused if you stumble it up all together. ;;A;;
Learn to use other verbose words and always remember your main plot because there are some instances that a story loses its meaning as it goes on further. My advise for you is to read more novels and fanfictions while writing this story. ^^ It'll also help you finding your very own writing style.
I hope my review helped, though. ;A;
Please don't hesitate to post a message on my wall or to PM me something. I don't bite. ;u;