the start

EXODUS ( unfinished )
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it was one of kris' job to watch over the human world , he was flying by in the clouds to make sure that no one could see him when he spotted a bright light coming from the forest , he overheard one of the humans before that this forest is hunted he did not pay attention to this before but seeing the light for the first time ever kris feels that he is being attracted to it perhaps it is a lost soul he thinks , so with that he flew down the forest to check it out making sure he is unseen by humans , but there he discovered a young kid he has a white skin and kind of droopy eyes , he was helping his grandmother water the plants after that he will shine light to the plants and talk to them , kris seeing the power the kid has got ready in any case that he might be in a battle.. but his mind was shouting he is just a kid what could he do to harm us? so for the first time in his life kris stopped thinking about the battle and just watched the kid happily playing around with his grandmother.. kris got so comfortable watching and laughing along the kid's cute little antics that he got frozen when the kid locked gazes with him , the kid smiled brightly to him and waved then run back in the house together with his grandma , kris got so shocked that he could not move after a few minutes he flew away returning to heaven , but he knows his heart and thoughts stay with the little kid..
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kikaynikkay
i dont think its good.. please tell me if i should continue or what...thanks!!!!

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yomiyomiyomi #1
Chapter 4: Am I too late to give a review? TT
Well, you should continue your story. Don't be afraid not to post the next chapter just because you're thinking no one might appreciate it. Write for yourself. Don't pressure yourself pleasing others. :)
As for this story, you might want to really lengthen each chapters more and capitalize letters if needed (if the word is a proper noun). And don't hesitate to put more spaces (by spaces I mean the type of spaces when you hit the 'Enter' button) and always remember to use proper punctuation marks because the readers might get confused if you stumble it up all together. ;;A;;
Learn to use other verbose words and always remember your main plot because there are some instances that a story loses its meaning as it goes on further. My advise for you is to read more novels and fanfictions while writing this story. ^^ It'll also help you finding your very own writing style.
I hope my review helped, though. ;A;
Please don't hesitate to post a message on my wall or to PM me something. I don't bite. ;u;