Luhan refuses to sleep. He just wraps Seohyun in his arms as the latter comfortably sleeps beside him. He is afraid that when she wakes up, he’ll no longer have any reasons to hold her like that. It might just be the last. He caresses her face and god, he misses her so much. He still misses her even though she’s in his arms that very moment.

“I love you.” He whispers. She stirs on her sleep, snuggling on his chest closer as if she hears him whispers those three words.

Luhan just stares at her as he wishes for time to stop because the rising sun might just change everything. But of course, it doesn’t happen. The next thing he knows, the sun has already taken over that side of the planet and she’s waking up. He watches her slowly opening her eyes, adjusting her vision because of the brightness in the room. After a few seconds, she looks up at him. He sees the confusion in her eyes but before he can explain why he’s there holding her as if his life depends on it, she smiles at him.

His heart is about to explode.

He leans in but before he can kiss her just like how he had always dreamed of for those five years, she covers with the back of her right hand.

“I’m a mess.” He hears her mumble. He chuckles and forgets everything else and pulls her hand away and finally, finally kisses her.

It only takes a second before everything suddenly feels right again.

They remain on the bed just holding each other after the kiss. No one bothers to move and both feel the contentment of just being there in each other’s arms. It has been so long since they feel that warmth and peacefulness only each other can provide them. But they know they need to talk and Seohyun feels like she’s the one who’s supposed to open up the topic.

“I’m sorry.” She whispers. Luhan hugs her tighter but doesn’t say anything. “I’m sorry I left. I’m sorry I kept things from you. I know―I know you hate me but I’m sorry I can’t feel the same way about you.”

Yes, he should hate her. After all, she is the one who left him without saying anything. But he can’t. Stupid, but he can’t hate her. No matter how much he tries. He leans in and kisses her forehead. “I don’t.” He whispers. “I tried so hard to hate you but I can’t.”

She looks up and stares at his eyes―those eyes she missed so much. Tears start forming in her eyes as she feels relieved upon knowing he doesn’t hate her.

“But I deserve that.” She says. “I deserve every hateful thing you can tell me. I left you, Luhan. I left you without any words, without any explanations. I hurt you. And you don’t deserve that.”

“So tell me. Tell me why you left.” He looks at her sincerely. “Tell me so I can understand.”

“Five years ago, my grandmother brought up about Juilliard when we were having our dinner in her place. She told my parents that it’s the best music school out there. And of course, my parents know that. I know about Juilliard. They told me to give it a try.” She takes a deep breath. “I did. I send a video of me playing the piano. I never thought I’d get in anyway so there’s no harm in doing that. But then I got an invitation for a live audition in New York. That week when I told you I’m going to stay at my grandma’s house, I was actually in New York, playing my heart out. And I got accepted.”

Luhan closes his eyes. “You should have told me.” He tells her.

“I should have.” She nods. “But Luhan, five years ago, you were not my priority.”

He feels like he’s stabbed from the back. Five years ago, he was already sure he wants to be with Seohyun for the rest of his life. All his plans back then included her. He feels betrayed that he was the only one who thought like that.

“How about now, Seohyun?” He asks. It takes all his willpower to ask her that. He isn’t quite sure if he’s prepared to whatever she’s going to say.

Heaven knows how badly Seohyun wants to say she wants him back but she can’t be selfish again. She sits up, and refuses to look at him. “It doesn’t matter now, Luhan. You’re with someone else already.”

Realization comes too quickly. Luhan smiles bitterly and cover his eyes with his arm. Right. Seohyun’s with someone else already. The kiss they shared that morning means nothing.

“Leave.” He says as his hold of her loosens. That’s it. His last try.

Seohyun looks at him one last time as she tries not to cry in front of him. She stands up, picks up the dress she wore the night before and goes to the bathroom to change.

###

Seohyun doesn’t know how Sehun knew where she is. She looked for her bag in Luhan’s condo before she left but wasn’t able to find it. Without having any other options, she just walks but the younger guy suddenly came with his car.

“Noona.” He gives her a sad smile. “Get in.”

Seohyun smiles back and follows. None of them say anything for quite awhile until Sehun finally decides to break the silence.

“Luhan hyung called me. I live just two blocks away so he probably thinks I’ll be there for you the soonest.” Sehun explains, glancing at the older girl once in a while.

Seohyun nods.

“Noona, what happened?” Sehun asks.

Seohyun just cries.

###

“She told me I’m not her priority five years ago.” Luhan tells Minseok that afternoon as the latter decides to give him a visit. Sehun called Minseok that morning to tell him what happened.

“That was five years ago, Luhan.” Minseok rolls his eyes at his best friend. “You know Seohyun. You know what she wants. And if leaving you means achieving her dreams, she’d do it. No matter how hard that is for her. Do you honestly think that if she stayed, she’ll be truly happy? If she didn’t leave, she’d never feel complete. She’ll regret not going. She’ll regret not giving it a try. And I know you don’t want her to feel like that. But it’s different now! She finally came back, Luhan.”

“What we think right now doesn’t matter anymore, Minseok!” Luhan yells.

“Oh, of course.” Sometimes, the urge to just punch his best friend is too high. Minseok sighs. “Of course. You’re with Chorong already. It doesn’t matter what she thinks right now because you’re with someone else already. You’re so stupid, Luhan.”

Luhan glares at Minseok before he laughs. “How come you didn’t know, Minseok?” Luhan asks. “Seohyun’s with someone else already.”

“What?” Minseok asks in disbelief.

“Go ask her about that Soohyun guy.”

###

Seohyun smiles at Hyoyeon who is busy making sure she looks gorgeous―it’s her wedding day, that’s why. Sooyoung and Yoona are telling the older girl that she looks amazing, which is the truth, but the girl is so nervous about the whole thing.

“Unnie!” Seohyun calls her favorite slash closest unnie. “Don’t worry! This day’s going to be perfect!”

Seohyun obviously has to pretend she’s okay. She’s happy for Hyoyeon, yes, but she still can’t stop thinking about Luhan, all the what ifs and what could have beens. Maybe if she returned a little earlier, Luhan could have not met Chorong. Or maybe, if she didn’t left, she could have been married to Luhan already. But she knows she can’t change anything now. All that’s left for her to do is tell Luhan that he’s Soohyun’s father. She wouldn’t ask for more than Luhan’s acceptance of his son. She just wishes Chorong will be okay with it.

“Gosh, Seohyun. I’m so nervous I feel like dying. You know I always mess things up. I might end up saying the wrong things! You know I can’t stop my mouth especially when I’m this nervous!” Hyoyeon complains and she holds on to Seohyun’s arms. The younger girl giggles at her.

“Then don’t be nervous, unnie! This is your day, remember? You’re the queen!” Seohyun laughs before she points out at the older girl’s tummy. “And I bet that little one is excited too!”

Hyoyeon being pregnant is the reason why the marriage was set five months earlier than what Hyoyeon and Jinki initially agreed upon. The night Jinki proposed made that little miracle.

“Speaking of little one, where is Soohyun?” Hyoyeon asks.

“Oh, he was throwing tantrums earlier so I figured I shouldn’t take him with me during the wedding.” Seohyun explains. “Mom will bring him in the reception though.”

“Who’s Soohyun?” Sooyoung asks. “Minseok asked me earlier about him too.”

“Me too.” Yoona says. “Apparently, Luhan has been thinking Seohyun has a new boyfriend.”

Seohyun’s eyes widen. Where the hell did Luhan even get that idea, anyway? Hyoyeon raises an eyebrow before she starts laughing so hard.

“Luhan’s an idiot.” Hyoyeon says, still laughing.

“Unnie!” Seohyun whines as she remembers that time Hyoyeon mentioned Soohyun in front of Luhan. “It’s your fault!”

Sooyoung and Yoona look at each other, confuse as to why Hyoyeon is suddenly laughing like a maniac while Seohyun looks uncomfortable. “Hey guys, I thought we’re friends? What are you keeping from us?” Yoona glares at Seohyun.

Seohyun sighs. “Soohyun―he’s my son.”

But before Seohyun can explain everything, Hyoyeon’s mother comes and tells them the wedding is about to start.

###

At the reception, Luhan and Seohyun have to pretend everything’s okay if only not to create any more trouble for their friends. Being on the same clique, they are placed in one table. Luhan doesn’t dare to look at Seohyun while the latter takes quick glances every now and then, nervous because Soohyun is about to come and she doesn’t know how he will react when he sees their son. She knows it is impossible now not to tell Luhan about Soohyun. She’s rehearsing every line she thinks she should say in her mind over and over again.

They are eating when Seohyun feels her phone vibrate. It is her mother. She gulps before she answers the call.

“Mom?”

“Are you sure you want this, Seohyun?” Her mom asks. She sighs.

“Yes. I can’t hide him anymore.” She whispers. Thankfully, the music in the hall is loud enough and Sooyoung and Yoona are busy chattering with their loud voices that no one hears her conversation with her mom.

“Alright. We’re here.”

Seohyun closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. She’s nervous but she knows her friends have to know about Soohyun, especially Luhan. Looking at Yoona, Seohyun excuses herself and leaves the hall.

###

“Kyungsoo hyung, why do I feel like I’m looking at a younger version of Luhan hyung?” Sehun asks the older guy beside him as he looks at the kid beside Seohyun walking towards their table. As if on cue, everyone looks at the direction where Sehun is staring.

Yoona gasps before she and Sooyoung stare at each other. Realization suddenly hits them.

Minseok puts his hand at Luhan’s shoulder as the latter continues staring at Seohyun and the kid she’s holding.

Seohyun holds her son’s wrist tighter as they finally reach the table.

“Guys, meet Soohyun.” She finally says.

One chapter left ~