I met Rita back in uni on my birthday party. Technically, she gate crashed at my house party along with Seungri, a classmate of mine in some subjects but we were not that close so I didn’t invite him. As I was preparing the drinks at the kitchen, they sneaked back door and casually strutted their way to the living room and started dancing like they were meant to be a part of the night. I let it go ‘cause it would be rude to kick them out of my house. I decided to just talk to Seungri later that time.

After 10 minutes of dancing, Rita went to me and asked for a drink.

“Hey, where can I get a cold drink?” she asked.

She was beautiful in her little black dress. Her long brown hair also makes her brown eyes more enticing and her face was so bright when she smiles. I was guessing she didn’t know that I am the host of the party that night.

“Here”, I handed her bottled water from the fridge.

She smiled in response. After that, she just left and went back to the center of the room partying like she just got out of a cage of curfews and of being grounded.

I knew right then she was the one that I would live for.

After ten years of living together, my feelings for Rita didn’t change. I wake up in the same bed with her, eat meals in the same table and entertain ourselves in the same room. But her feelings did. I know. In this world full of love and hatred, those who fell deep in to both pits become blinded by positivity and negativity. All they see in their love ones are those good things that others see as just something. While all they see in the person who they hate the most are the worst parts of them. And when they realized that they hit the bottom of the pit too hard, it’s already difficult for them to climb back up.

But that wasn’t the case, I love Rita. I was blinded, yes, but today it was different.

It is our 10^th anniversary and I planned to surprise her, to rekindle the then love we had. But he beat me to it…

…with another man

…with Seungri.

I walked into them in our bedroom, doing things I don’t even want to remember. I wasn’t able to move at first. I was glued in my spot not knowing what to do.

“King”, she said. That voice, husky and hoarse mixed with guilt and a tinge of lust that remained from what she did. Seungri was silently pulling his pants up while picking his clothes ready to flee.

“I’m sorry”, that voice again. I don’t want to hear those two words from her. The pain I am feeling right cannot be compared from what I felt from before. But at the same time, I feel numb. I feel lifeless.