"Zitao, please," Yifan carefully pushed the younger away from him, "Don't do this,"

Zitao frowned, "Why not?"

Yifan let out a sarcastic laugh, "Why not?" he repeated, "Did you already forget about Sehun? We shouldn't do this,"

"Why are you crying?"

The question caught Yifan of guard, "Zitao-"

"For once please tell me what you're thinking,"

Yifan glared back, wiping his eyes, "I just feel bad for you. I feel bad for leaving EXO, and it's killing me that I left you. Though I know I made the right decision by doing so," 

He sighed as he held the youngers hand once again, "You meant a lot to me, and you still do. EXO overall meant so much to me, but my body couldn't take it any longer. So I'm crying out of guilt, ok?"

Zitao studied him, "Will you come back?"

"No," Yifan's answer was barely a whisper, but the tone was firm.

"Then can't we just be like we were before? Just for today?" Zitao asked just as quietly.

Yifan looked at the other for a while - Zitao lost count after 10 seconds - Yifan's eyes were full of questions, screaming out pain. Something inside of Zitao told him that this was the last time he'd ever meet Yifan again, and it sent shivers through his blood. He lowered his head first, closing the distance as he pulled the other into a hug. 

Maybe minutes passed? Zitao wasn't really sure, but the feeling of 'never again' frightened him, wanted him to keep Yifan as close as possible. As he inhaled Yifan's scent, the anger was far gone. Zitao left a small kiss on Yifan's exposed neck, holding his lips there for a moment before he placed another one further up. 

Yifan shivered, Zitao knew all about his sweet spots and when he had carressed them, making Yifan feel loved, had been one of the most important things back then. He parted his mouth, tracing it along the tender skin, inhaling sharply in the process, smiling as he recieved a moan from the elder.

The moan egged him on, leaving an open kiss against the other's neck, tracing his lips along the sharp jawline until he was face to face with the older. Yifan's eyes was closed and Zitao wasted no time to connect their lips once again.

Just as the kiss started though, Zitao was pushed away, "Zitao, stop,"

Zitao was confused, "But-"

"No!" the loud voice made Zitao flinch and Yifan took hold of his arm, "Didn't you listen to me before when I mentioned Sehun?! You're in a ing relationship now, Zitao! Do not forget that,"

"Don't mention him!" Zitao yelled back, "I know full well that this is the last time I'll ever see you again! So can you please just forget about our reality? Just for now?"

Yifan gave him that dead stare again, "Do you love Sehun?"

"Yes!"

"Then stop," 

With that Yifan left the room.

Zitao sank down on the ground as he heard Yifan collapse on the couch again. He couldn't really understand his heart, but right now the only thing he wanted was to be near Yifan. Of course he loved Sehun, but he had hated Yifan, thinking he would never meet him again... But now he was here, right beside him. 

Zitao took a deep breath as he stood up, walking into the other room, "How have you been then?" he tried, hoping at least they could have a decent conversation, because there was still so much he wanted to be updated on.

Yifan seemed to follow, "It's been hard, but I've been good," he smiled, "It was a long time ago I felt this happy,"

They managed to start a good conversation, talking about what had happened in both their lives after Yifan had left. They had also played their favorite card game and heated up some frozen pizza's they found in the freezer, eating it while watching a random movie. They laughed until they cried and it seemed like the time had been rewined to the old days. They hadn't checked the time once, and got reminded when Yifan's friend called,

"Hello?" Yifan answered, "Oh , already?"
... 
"Yeah, I mean if it's alright with you?"
...
"Ok, wait," he looked over at Zitao, lowering his phone, "Zitao, it's already 11pm and I should be going if you don't... um,"

Zitao panicked, pulling up his phone as well, ", already?" checking it, he was relieved it was 'only' 2 missed calls from his mother, "My mum must be worried," he laughed.

He looked over at Yifan, "Do you have to go?"

"I was just about to ask you if maybe... I don't know, I mean, my friend said we could, you know, stay here over night-"

"I want to!"

Zitao's fast answer sent a smile to Yifan's face, and he brought the phone to his ear again, "Thank you, we will stay then."

He finished the call, "You should call your mum," Yifan smiled and Zitao giggled as he dialled home.

"Hey, mum!"
...
"I know, I'm sorry! I just ran into an old friend,"
...
"Of course, I'm ok!"
...
"I know it's late, so is it ok if I sleep here?"
...
"Ah, I don't think you ever met him,"
...
"Mum please, I will come home before lunch tomorrow, ok?"
...
"Thank you!" Zitao gave him thumbs up.

As Zitao ended the call Yifan raised an eyebrow, "Is it ok to lie to your mother like this?"

Zitao rolled his eyes, "If I told you it was you, she probably would've called the police,"

"Haha!"

Yifan had to get up early, so after another round of the card game they headed to bed. Finding un-used toothbrushes and t-shirts to sleep in. The bed wasn't big, but not that small either, and none of them really cared about sleeping beside each other - they had already done that many times before anyway...

As the lights were off, Zitao watched the older, fingers reaching out to trace the sharp features once again, "You're still very handsome,"

Yifan snorted, "I guess,"

"But I'm still better," Zitao finished and giggled, earning the famous y glare in return.

"Still as admired by yourself?" Yifan asked, "I should've knowned,"

The younger laughed, "I'm just quoting my fans,"

"Yeah right..."

"Hey!" Zitao slapped Yifan's arm and the other laughed out loudly.

Zitao kept on throwing light punches on the older as Yifan did his best to hide under the covers. 

The fight soon died out when their bodies got close, eyes meeting. 
Zitao noticed Yifan struggling to keep his hands to himself just as much as he did. 

It felt so normal to lean in, pressing their lips together without even thinking. When they pulled away Zitao only managed to let out a quiet 'please', before Yifan captured his lips once again. The kiss was slow, but daring - hands slipping their ways beneath their clothes, caressing smooth skin.

Zitao let out a moan, he had missed this. He knew he loved Sehun, but it had always been special with Yifan.  With Sehun it was out in the open, they talked about it, they explored. With Yifan it had only been shared emotions, stolen kisses, no talk and plain trust. Everyone said it was difficult to forget your first love - Zitao was a very good example of this.

Yifan switched in position to lie on top of the younger, mouth moving down to his neck, leaving wet open kisses, knowing the right spots. Zitao closed his eyes as he let Yifan explore him, his own hands coming up to caress Yifan's broad shoulders. Zitao sighed into the kiss as their mouths connected once more.

Zitao found himself slightly trembling, overwhelmed by the emotions his body and mind was feeling. Pressing Yifan closer, he trusted his hips up, letting Yifan feel how much he'd missed this, how hard he was starting to get. Yifan moaned into his mouth and pressed his own hips down, meeting Zitao's. The grinding made them both full hard into arousal within seconds, and Yifan pulled down Zitao's pants with ease, sliding big hands inside the red boxers, squeezing Zitao's . The squeeze made Zitao groan out in need, fumbling to reach in between them to Yifan's clothed bulge. Sehun was never rough with Zitao, which was the total opposite in how Yifan handled him. It sent a kick to Zitao, making him feel needed and y. 

A bite on the nape of his neck made Zitao reach his limit, "Just do it!" he almost screamed out, "Please, Yifan, please I'm begging you,"

Yifan hovered over him, deep eyes looking down, "Zitao, you know yo-"

"I've been wanting to touch you, kiss you, feel you ever since this we had started," Zitao said firmly, "I was devestated when you stopped, because you made me feel unwanted-"

"You're not unwanted-"

"But that's what it feels like! I loved you! I really really loved you, yet you refused to touch me even though I felt you wanted to," he gave the older's a squeeze, "If you still want me, this is your last chance," 

Yifan stared at him, eyes flickering from the sharp eyes to his kiss-swollen lips. Zitao reached up for a kiss, "Show me that you love me,"

Yifan took a deep breath, "Won't you regret it?"

Zitao pulled himself up on his elbows, noses touching, "No," he mumbled against the other's mouth, "You know I won't,"

Yifan relaxed, and soon the roughness turned softer, tender, more loving. Zitao was surprised how well it was going, how his body kept on shaking, how could Yifan be this good? Even though it hurted a bit without any lube in hand, Zitao was even more surprised how easy Yifan's slided inside of him, regarding his size. How Yifan got so good at , stretching him out, was another mystery left untold.

 

Yifan was woken up by his phone ringing - it was time for his schedule.
Looking down at the sleeping younger boy, he wished he didn't have to go back to reality. The decision of finally having with Zitao had probably been the worst and best choice the both of them had made. They had gotten what they always wanted, but it would have been so much easier to leave and forget if they hadn't.

He lied down again, spooning Zitao, kissing his neck, "Time to wake up," 

Zitao turned around, hugging the older, "I don't really want to,"

Yifan sighed and kissed the top of his head, "Me neither,"

"When does your schedule start?"

"My manager is picking me up in one hour,"

Zitao tried to ignore the pain stabbing his heart, "I see,"

Yifan hugged him closer, "When are you going back to Korea?"

"In two days,"

They cuddled for a while, sharing more kisses before making breakfast. The smile on their faces never fading and Zitao felt fulfilled once again, trying to ignore the fact that it was only 20 minutes left before they had to part once again. Zitao was supposed to go home 10 minutes prior, before Yifan's manager had to pick him up in the park. 

"Wouldn't it be easier if I quit as well?" Zitao mumled against Yifan's neck as they hugged.

"No," Yifan sighed, "See? This is why I didn't tell you, like I said-"

"I know... But-"

"Live your life as you want, Zitao. Have fun with Sehun, with your fans, with EXO," Yifan kissed his cheek.

Zitao nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat.

Yifan smiled at him, "And don't say we'll never meet again, because who knows?"

Zitao rolled his eyes, "Yeah, that chance is around one in a million,"

Yifan looked at him, "Don't say that," he paused, "But can you keep quiet about this? Don't tell the others you met me,"

"Wh-"

"It would only cause misunderstandings. People would get angry at you... especiallly Sehun," he ended with a whisper.

Zitao nodded and glanced at the kitchen clock - five more minutes.

"Can we kiss before I leave?"

Yifan laughed, "Of course,"

And they did, pouring out their feelings, the lost love, feeling each others' touch for one last time.

~ 

Zitao had been crying the whole way back home, not even trying to make it stop. He had made the tears into an excuse to his parents, saying he wanted to go back to Korea, saying he missed his friends. It hadn't been hard to convince them with all the tears and sobbing, staying in China now would only make it worse. The thoughts about Yifan would never leave his head if he stayed here.

He was pretty much drained out when he boarded the plane to Seoul the next day, eyes even more dark and puffy than they usually were. It would only hurt if he cried more, bringing more salt into his sensitive eyes. 

As he reached the dorm he was met with confusion - getting asked why he was home early, why it looked like he hadn't slept in weeks, if he was sick, why why why, until Sehun grabbed him and pulled him into his room.

"Shh, it's ok," Sehun said as he hugged him close, sitting down on the bed.

Zitao held onto his boyfriend tight, sobbing into the newly washed t-shirt, "It hurts," he said with raspy voice, "My eyes hurt,"

Sehun smiled, "It will stop hurting later, so let the tears out,"

Zitao felt horrible, both because he missed Yifan and because he didn't feel as guilty as he should. He had cheated on Sehun, his boyfriend, the boy he loved and who loved him.

"Sehun," he started, clearing his throat, "I..." he couldn't say it, he didn't want to, he had promised not to, "I'm sorry,"

Sehun only hugged him closer, laying down with him on the bed, his hair. Zitao kept apologizing, kept on crying, and Sehun could only accept and take it in.

"I love you," Sehun said calmly, kissing Zitao's forehead, "I love you so much,"

Zitao looked up at him, "I love you too," he said smiling, "Thank you,"

It took 30 minutes for Zitao to fall asleep. Sehun waited 15 more minutes after that, holding his boyfriend, giving him the comfort he knew he needed, before he slowly eased himself out of the bed. After stepping out of the room, closing the door behind him, he sank down on one of the kitchen chairs beside Kyungsoo who was reading yet another sport manga. The other members occupied in front of the television.

"How is he?" Kyungsoo asked.

Sehun sighed, "He met Yifan,"

Kyungsoo stared at him, closing the book, "He told you?"

Sehun shook his head, "There's only one person who make him cry like this."

"You got a point," Kyungsoo gave him a sad look, "How are you feeling about this?"

"I don't know," he drew his hand through his hair, "I just hope they sorted things out,"

Kyungsoo nodded.

"I mean he loved Yifan," Sehun continued, "And even though I'm his boyfriend now, I don't want them to hate each other."

"What if Yifan loved Zitao as well?"

"Look, I know they had something going on, I'm not stupid. If only Zitao did what he wanted to do in order to feel closure... whatever happened between those two in Qingdao won't bother me,"

Kyungsoo squeezed the youngest shoulder, "I think it will turn out ok,"

Sehun smiled, "Yeah, me too."


- - - THE END - - - 


A/N: So that's it~ Thank you all for reading my story!♥ A big hug to all the subscribers and readers! ;_;
I hope you liked the outcome? haha
I'm sorry for delaying you all with the last part >< Hope you'll have a great summer and take care :)