nobody said it was my job, but it was more than just a job: it was a responsibility that i am willing to sacrifice anything for in order to fulfil it. i had the lives of eight people in my hands, i had the nine of us in my hands. it was only slowly after time all of us felt that we had a part to play to make sure we will stay together- forever. right? people used to say that soshi is forever- oh wait, we said that ourselves too. we said 'nine is forever'.

i thought we were indestructible- well that is the only explanation why we had such a song about ourselves-  and i thought nothing could easily break everything that we've built up over seven years.

who knows, what i thought was utterly wrong. your decision caused us all to fall apart. (i'm not saying that you solely are at wrong- after all every single one of us had an important role, but i would just like you to think if what you did was right.) of course sunny just didn't want you to go. hyoyeon was being her usual empathetic person and was understanding towards you. yoona was being gracious as she is to defend you because she believed in our number nine. on the other hand, tiffany said it was "unfair" and you were "just showing no dedication". yuri threw black faces all the time and said you were "not trustable" and had "lost all hope in" you. sooyoung claimed that she was "disappointed in" you (and not to mention, I also know that you two fought over the matter before).  and then, there's me and makna