AN: I have no idea what I'm doing...

There was a week after that impromptu kiss in which Chanyeol did not see the blonde model - not that he even remembered him, to the waiter Kris was just a passing face that he easily forgot - but for some reason he had an increase in people asking him random questions.

“What is your relationship with Wu Yifan?” Someone came up to the auburn giant, crowding his space with a microphone and camera.

“Listen lady, I haven’t the slightest idea who this ‘Yifan’ character is, so you could either continue questioning me with useless queries and further dampen your reputation for cornering an innocent waiter, or you can order something like people in a restaurant are supposed to do, and then you can leave. Your choice.” The lady he had just lectured turned beet red for the interview she was supposed to hold was being filmed live, and this cocky waiter had just humiliated her in front of millions of people.

“Yifan, or more commonly known as Kris,” she paused, waiting for any sort of reaction. To her disappointment there was none, “is the film star you were caught kissing. Does this ring any bells?”

Chanyeol thought for a moment about the past week. He had kissed about five people in total, three of them could be scratched off the list seeing as they were female - unless Wu Yifan or Kris was a woman, which it very well could be. He didn’t really care to know the occupation of his customers, so he wouldn’t know if he kissed any film stars.

“I can’t say it does. Sorry.” His tone suggested he was anything but sorry.

The woman held a tablet up to Chanyeol’s face. At the raise of his eyebrow she explained, “This is the picture that was taken at the scene. Now what is your relation to him?”

Examining the picture closely, he saw blonde hair and red, lots of red. “Oh, it’s that one customer that thought he was better than the rest of the human race because he’s ‘famous’. He was rather annoying, to be honest. I felt the need to kiss someone and he was convenient. I forgot he existed. Funny how that works.”

The reporters didn’t know if he was being sarcastic or not; his voice stayed completely monotone throughout the ordeal. “So... you two aren’t dating?”  She asked, relatively confused.

Chanyeol smirked, the first facial expression they had seen from him, “I’ll leave that up for you to decide. But in the meantime, I have work to do, so if you will kindly vacate the premises that would be marvelous.”

As the waiter brushed passed the reporters, the woman turned toward the camera, microphone in hand. “He didn’t deny nor confirm the fact that they were dating. Although he said he doesn’t know the celebrity Kris, this could be a diversion, while they are actually dating behind the scenes. More on this later.” And with that the camera turned off. “I can’t believe the nerve of that waiter. It just makes me so mad.” She exploded as soon as they left the restaurant.

Another smirk built on Chanyeol’s face as he heard the outburst. “I love my job,” he stated casually, as if he could actually feel love as an emotion. He didn’t actually know what all the fuss was about ‘dating’ some random person, and he honestly didn’t care. The only problem being that people kept bothering him. At work it was the reporters or occasional fangirls. In the streets it was the fangirls and paparazzi.

Chanyeol supposed they couldn’t help it, he was a beauty to look at. They couldn’t help but take multiple pictures of his flawless complexion, and they couldn’t stop themselves from screaming their lungs out when he breathed. He was just born to be perfect. Some may call him conceited, but he was simply stating a fact that others often stated for him. Just a little tweaking here and there in the sentence to change it from ‘They’re such a perfect couple’ to ‘Chanyeol’s such a perfect being’. Either way it’s somewhat about him, he just doesn’t even know the person he’s dating.

“Hey,” a deep voice behind him said, tapping his shoulder. He turned to find some tall blonde dude with a face that screamed ‘angry’.

“Hey,” he said back, not even sure why this guy approached him. Random girly squeals sounded around him, ‘oh my gosh, they’re together!’ ‘do you think they’ll kiss again?’

“Can we speak in private?” The blonde guy asked, seeming a bit nervous for reasons unknown to Chanyeol. Who was this guy?

“Why?”

Blonde dude looked around at their audience. “Because they’re all listening.”

Chanyeol crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. “I don’t see why they care. Who are you anyway?”

The guy’s eyes widened, “I’m Kris. The one you’re supposedly dating. You know, the guy you kissed. I could report you for ual harassment you know.”

“Oh, so you’re that guy. And if you wanted to sue me, I’d be a few dollars short of what I am now, but I’m not, so I think we’re good.”

Kris scoffed lightly, attempting to look cool despite the growing blush on his face. “Yeah... so can we speak in private?” He asked again, apparently intent on speaking to Chanyeol.

The waiter let out a long sigh. “Follow me.” He brought them to the break room next to the kitchen - which if one asked him, he would say it was terrible planning on the architect’s part, for the smells in the kitchen overrode every rational thought in any sane person’s head, and that’s hardly a break.

Chanyeol motioned for the celebrity to continue, “So because of this scandal, which was entirely your fault if we’re to be honest, my manager has made a few decisions.” He paused to burn a bright pink and take a few calming breaths. “He decided that the image of me dating a commoner,” Chanyeol rose his eyebrows at the name, “would bring more of a human side to my image. So his plan is that we come out as dating.”

“This is so freaking cliche,” Chanyeol deadpanned. “So no. I won’t. And since your manager has no jurisdiction over my life, and I cannot be bought with money - I probably have more than you anyway - so I refuse. I’m not going to date an idiot that I’ve met twice because it would strengthen your image. I’m not nice, and I don’t plan on changing that for a mere ‘commoner’ like yourself. Compared to me, you’re still the lowest of lows. Peasant.”

Kris was once again left floundering like a fish in front of his - now official - crush. Which yes, he’ll admit, he totally made that ‘manager wants us to date’ excuse up so he could date the gorgeous waiter. Now he’ll just have to find some other way to make Chanyeol his.