As the clock's hands start to halt for the two of us, one of the voices in my head pulls away from the darkness to ask me a question.

"Of all the people in the world, why does Lee Taemin choose to stare at me? Why does he stare at a monster?" the tiny whimper asks me.

It is another question that I can't answer. And yet, there is a voice - one with an amount of influence beyond my own capabilities - buried deep deep deep inside of me that is telling me that, soon, even that question will be answered, too.

The statement is so unrealistic that I can't even believe my own self anymore.

When I quiet all the voices in my head once more and push my way back to reality, I see that Taemin's slowly starting to walk towards me.

I think, Ohgodohgodohgod he's coming towards me.

Taemin's slowly starting to sit down next to me.

I think, Tooclosetooclosetoodeliciouslyclose why do I want you to come closer?

Then time forgets that it stopped for Taemin and I. Time starts to function for the rest of the world again and goes back to normal.

Neither of us speaks for a long time, and I take this opportunity to observe the human that has chosen to interact with a monster. I see a crisp, clean suit with a crisp, clean tie that gives me the feeling that he's probably some sort of successful businessman. I see two pale-skinned fists clenched together and two lips pursed together in a crisp, clean line. There are two low cut cheekbones with harsh and soft edges; there are two partings of black hair which fall just below his eyebrows.

But in the midst of all these refined yet soft features, all I can really see is the millions of emotions hidden in two eyes. Somewhere in those deep brown orbs I can see something like happiness and anger whirling beneath those flecks of hazel, tinged with a grey sadness. One glance from him is stirring something from within me; an emotion I haven't felt in three years. His gaze intrigues me, but I also want to pull away.

What is this stranger doing to me?

There is too much silence. I search around my throat to find my voice, and I speak.

"Are you... Lee Taemin?" I croak out. My voice sounds strange in my ears and I probably shouldn't know the reason why, but I do.

I haven't spoken in three years.

I haven't tried to speak in three years, because there was nothing nobody no one to speak to.

I've been alone for the past three years.

This is not the first time that I have realized that. 

It takes Taemin a few moments to respond to my question. I can see the gears turning in his brain, the millions of emotions running through his eyes. There are thoughts running through his brain, too, whirling around to create a tornado of words and questions that may go unanswered one day. It reminds me so much of my insane and abnormal mind. And I find a strange comfort in knowing that there is another monster in front of me, despite knowing the danger a monster's mind can do to itself.

He asks another question. "Do you remember me?"

This sends the gears in my brain into overdrive and my voices into a frenzy. I search my empty memory for a scrap of this man, to see if he has ever been with me at one point in my life. All I can see is a blurry smile in front of the sunlight, but that too disappears as quickly as my insanity. 

Now, more than ever, I want to know if this stranger has been with me.

I try to tell myself to take back what I want to say, but the voices push me to say

"No."

Disappointment registers on Taemin's face and I can see it more than any other emotion that he has shown to me tonight. He tries to hide it with a forced smile and looks towards me, trying to convince me that he will be alright and he will survive this disappointment.

Am I the only one who can see through him so easily?

Taemin speaks again, his expression a blank slate. "Well, do you remember your name?"

"Jung Soojung," I manage to say after a few moments of silence. I can't believe I remember that of all things.

"Jung Soojung," he repeats, slowly and deliberately, as if the name is foreign on his tongue. For some reason, his voice is always surrounded by this aura of grey and black which makes everything he says sound like the calm before the storm. "That's a very pretty name, you know."

Why do I feel as if he's said that before?

"Thank you," I say, despite myself. It's been a lifetime since the last time I've ever received a compliment.

A blanket of silence falls between us once more, and his stare bores through my skull every single second.

"Do you want to take a stroll around town?" Taemin suggests sheepishly, one eyebrow raised. "Maybe... maybe it'll refresh your memory."

I doubt that.

Despite my weary thoughts, I don't have the heart to say no. So I agree, and a few paces later, Taemin and I are out of the convenience store and walking down the sidewalk.

The streets are lit up by the lights shining from the shops and the lanterns draped across the street. I notice that Taemin and I aren't the only ones walking on the sidewalk; there are people all around us. Sometimes there are groups of people walking together and sometimes it's just a couple huddled together whispering in each other's ears about who-knows-what. When I breathe out, my breath comes out in a foggy, white cloud that evaporates into the chilly air a few moments afterwards, allowing me to repeat the process all over again. When I look down, I see my two feet walking in front of the other that makes a calm, steady rhythm in my ears; when I look up, moonlight makes its way through the dew hanging on the leaves of each tree. Energy courses through the fingers wiggling in my pockets; wind courses through my long hair and stains my cheeks with blooms of pink and red. I'm experiencing so many sensations and seeing so many new things at one time. I'm becoming surprised at how many things I can feel now, after not having felt anything for the past three years.

There's a part of me that wants to be here for the rest of my life, to experience this every single day. When I think about it, it sounds so exciting; I can only imagine the sensations that I can feel every single day. There wouldn't be anything holding me back and the thought of it is already tempting and intoxicating. But there's another part of me, the one I've been listening to for the past three years, that craves for solitude and loneliness, that craves the feeling of a ratty brown couch underneath my bare feet. This part of me is intimidated by all of these newfound feelings and sights and just wants to go back home.

I have no idea which one to listen to, for I want the best of both worlds.

But I know better than that. Such decisions are considered ridiculous in my eyes.

While my mind and body becomes adjusted to this new environment, there is one person that is seemingly used to all of these feelings and is passing each one of them by with nothing but a sidelong glance, and that is the same person who's been staring at my fascination this entire time: Taemin. I'm trying my best to ignore his glances towards my rosy cheeks and my curious eyes, but I can't take it anymore and I finally turn towards him. I'm looking at his sad brown eyes again and his lips that are forming words.

His mouth forms the words, "Do you remember where you've been, or what you've been doing lately?"

My voices are pushing me to lie to Taemin and make him think that the last three years haven't been filled with empty stares towards the carpet floor; to make Taemin think that for days on end I haven't only eaten packets of ramen and drank cans of beer. I, too, want to make the last three years sound eventful and full of productivity. But why do I have to lie if to someone else if the only person I've been lying to is myself?

I make a decision: speak the truth.

"Well, the past few years have been pretty... boring," I start and I wince; I know I'm letting a few lies slip through my two parted lips. But I keep going anyway. "I remember getting into an accident when I was, I think, eighteen. But I really can't remember anything after that." At least that's the truth.

Taemin's still listening, and nods along. I can see he knows more than he's showing. "So what have you been doing since then?" he asks.

I reply with silence. Taemin takes this as a cue to stop talking, which he does. For a few minutes, all I hear is the soft murmur of pedestrian's chatter and my shoes making hollow steps against the sidewalk.

He looks at me one more time and asks, "Can I help you remember?"

Please help me remember who you are, so I don't have to go through this pain anymore.

I pause, erasing this thought, and then - "Yes."

Taemin nods with his lips curved up in a small smile and says, "That's probably the best thing you've said all day." His eyes twinkle like the stars in the night sky, and all I see is hope making his smile wider.

I want to smile with him, too, for this moment seems almost like a miracle for him. But I have no idea why he is so happy from the one word that slipped from my lips; I don't know why he's walking with a spring in his step now. All because I can't remember what he does.

I hate that my memory is a blank slate, for I want to remember what he does. I hate this feeling of unknowing, the feeling of not being able to be in sync with him.

Despite my frustration, I still manage to convey a little smile in his direction and hope that Taemin doesn't notice the emptiness woven into my two pink lips.

¿

One by one, the people on the sidewalk turn back to their homes and the lights in the windows of each shops turn off, signs being turned from "OPEN" to "CLOSED". Soon, the moonlight is only following Taemin and I like a spotlight while silence plugs my ears, leaving us alone with only one beam of light.

The only shop that's still open at this late hour is a quaint little music shop at the corner of the street. This is where Taemin leads me first. I don't know why.

Taemin breaks into a wide smile seeing a piano with a sign that reads, "Play Me!". Immediately he makes his way to it, finding his place with his fingers resting on the keys. The owner of the store - a bearded, lean man who looks like he's in his late forties - is passed out by the cashier, his hand lazily carrying a newspaper and a line of drool making its way down his chin. It doesn't look like he minds Taemin playing, so I shrug my shoulders and make my way to him slowly, my eyes still taking in the assortment of shiny guitars hanging on the beige wall and the violins and cellos propped up on display in the back corner of the store. My hands rest on the top of the piano with my chin atop of it; for some reason, I'm eager to hear what Taemin will play for me.

I take that last thought back. Why would he play for a stranger?

A soft melody makes its way into the atmosphere of the store, the melancholy notes tinged with nostalgia finding my ears. I find that Taemin is already pressing his fingers down on the keys, making his way up and down the keyboard. Delicate fingertips are brushing the black and the white; eyes are trained and focused on the melody of the song. When he's in this position, with his eyes half closed and a small smile gracing his lips, I think that this is the most handsome side of him that I've seen all day. I like it a lot better than the one who stares at me with sadness.

Then, he starts singing.

"That sky, that sea; that air, that light; that scent, the moment's feeling..."

Something stirs inside me as I hear these words form from his mouth. I can't seem to put my finger on it, but I feel as if I know this melody. It seems so familiar in my ears as if I've heard it a million times before this. I feel as if I should know the lyrics, like I should sing along to it with a smile on my face.

"Like a frozen film. the memory of you and I..."

My body raises itself without a command and circles around the piano, sitting down beside him with my eyes watching his fingers and his two parted lips creating a seamless whole, one nostalgic song polluting the air with memories. I can feel emotion being poured into the lyrics and into the air, filling me to the brim with frustration and sadness. I can feel him. 

"The wind is blowing... you sweep in...  come back, even as tears, so that my eyes can see you clearly..."

Against my will, my fingers rest on the black and white keys, pressing down on the keys in time with Taemin. Fuzziness fills my head with two figures in a lit space, laughing and playing this exact same song as well. I'm playing this with him and I'm remembering how to play this oh so familiar song, even with this indistinct memory in my head.

"Pass through time, cross through memories..."

Taemin stops singing. He stops his fingers on the keys, but I can't stop myself from singing. I can't stop myself from letting a tear slip down my pale cheek.

"Just for a day, a moment, come back to me... Rewind..."

The song ends and my breath leaves me for a second, along with that blurry memory. My fingers slip from the keys and falls onto my lap and I'm completely stunned, what the hell did I just do? Were those two blurry figures Taemin and I? How did I just play that song? Why am I remembering now of all -

Someone is sniffling. When I turn to my left, Taemin is staring at me again but instead of it being from fear and anger, it's out of the ability to not believe. Tears are falling from his eyes, pouring down like rain in the spring. That voice that was buried within me is telling me to wipe his tears and my fingers are itching to do it, but I just can't bring myself to do that one deed.

My eye widen as his hands cup my cheeks, his eyes darting back and forth as he my skin with the pad of his thumbs. Electricity runs through both of us, connecting us.

I want to kiss him.

But instead, my shaky voice whispers, "What the hell did I just do?"

He shakes his head and he replies, "You remembered me."

Before I can speak again, Taemin's hands slip from my cheeks and slide down my arms before finally resting on my fingers. His forehead finds its way onto my shoulders. He cries. His body shakes with sobs and is murmuring fragments of sentences like, "Where did you go, Soojung...?" and "I want you to come back..." Taemin has broken like a porcelain doll and all I could do was watch him as his pieces are scattered around him.

Even now, I have no control over my body as my arms wrap around his shaking back. I pull him close to my chest; my nose find its way to rest in the crown of his head. My body does these actions with ease and I find myself wondering what I must've done in the past to do things like caring for another human being.

We stay like this for a few moments, just Taemin and I.

For the first time in three years, a clear memory floats into my head. It's of Taemin and I, staying close together by the piano, playing that same song over and over again with smiles on our faces and the sun working its way through our hair.

I can only wonder why that that happy moment was taken away from me.

For the first time in three years, I want nothing more than Taemin by my side again.

A/N: Copyright goes to the owner of this song. If you want to know that the song is, it is titled Rewind from the My Lovely Girl OST: Part 6. There are two versions: one by Gavy NJ and one by Krystal and Lee Shiah. Take a listen down here if you want to play it while reading.