Youngbae Hyung.

This hyung is honest. Very honest. In fact, back then, I thought he was too honest. But looking back now, it's just my young self and my ego getting easily offended by his remarks. He'll say what's on his mind and he doesn't sugarcoat things. Some will call him stubborn, but others will say he's just assertive. Youngbae hyung almost look at Daesung hyung the same way he looks at Jiyong hyung. Like a friend rather than a maknae. I think Daesung hyung confides in him the most. Probably cause they're the most similar in personality. I think he puts Daesung hyung on the same platform as himself. There's a mutal respect and admiration there.

2006

"Daesung is uncomfortable around you." 
 

And that was how Seungri found out. Just like that. Out of the blue. 
 

Youngbae doesn't play well with riddles. Straight to the heart of the matter, that one. 
 

Seungri recalled how he had reacted - felt, rather than see - his eyebrows curving inwards, forehead creased to a frown. His entire body already on it's way to brush off this claim and believing that his hyung was just pulling his leg. 
 

"What?" 
 

Youngbae didn't bother to repeat himself, just shrugged his shoulders and said dismissively, "You heard me." 
 

"But," now Seungri was just confused. "Why? What did I do?" 
 

Youngbae pulled him in by the shoulder, forcing Seungri to be squished against his built frame (some parts of Seungri's mind made a mental note about going to the gym) and then whispered close to his right ear, "How the heck should I know?" 

Seungri groaned, and then wrestled his way out of Youngbae's hold. He quickly pushed himself off the couch to straighten his sideburns. "Ah hyung! Why would you tell me that if you don't know the reason?" 

If Youngbae was concerned, he didn't show it. He leaned further into the couch, arms stretched and resting on top of the headrest. "I didn't ask him why, I didn't think he'll tell me anyway." 

"What do you expect me to do with this information?" Seungri had asked him. 

"I don't know Seunghyun-ah, but I figured I should tell you, so you wouldn't be in the dark." 

"We share the same room." 

"I know." 

"We sleep on the same bed." 

"I am well aware of that fact as well." 

"How can he be uncomfortable with me?" Seungri asked. "Hyung, my face was inches from his when we woke up this morning. You know what he did?" 

"Please don't tell me he kissed you. Is that why he's uncomfortable? Maybe he regretted his actions and I wouldn't blame hi-" 

"He didn't kiss me," Seungri cut him, annoyed.

"He just smiled and said good morning." And then he turned over and got out of bed and they never said another word to each other until they had reassembled in the living room getting ready to be shipped off to the studio. Seungri didn't mention this part to Youngbae because now that he thought about it, yeah, they hardly spoke to each other when it was just the two of them. 

This time, it was Youngbae's turn to sigh. "Seunghyun-ah, it's Daesungie, of course he'll smile and say good morning. He has manners, unlike you." 

Seungri frowned (and if he had pouted, he would never admit to it for anything less than barbeque pork skin), "I have plenty of manners." 

"Then start giving it away!" Youngbae laughed. 

"Stop making fun of me." 

"You always make it too easy maknae," Youngbae smiled. "Listen, I told you because it's important. We can't have falling out between members this early into the game. We only have one shot at this Seunghyun-ah." 

"I'm the member that got kicked out. I think I know what's on the line here." 

"Which is why I'm telling you," Youngbae stressed. "So you know all the cards you've been dealt with. It's only fair." 

Seungri nodded. "Thanks hyung." 

"I told him the same thing I told you. He just doesn't know that you know that he's uncomfortable with you." 

"Did he tell you to keep it a secret?" 

Youngbae nodded. "He doesn't want your feelings hurt. Said it's not your fault and that it's his problem to handle." 

"Then why did you tell me?" Seungri asked. "My feelings are hurt." 

"Because problems will not get solved unless we are aware there is a problem in the first place," Youngbae replied. "And also because some part of me actually care about you both. Seriously, you two kids will be the end of us." 

Seungri scoffed. Please. He has never seen a bunch of immature adults until he met the three hyungs. Big Seunghyun alone could end this band with his ridiculous antics. Of course, Seungri didn't say this out loud. He still values his life, very much. 

"Please," Seungri said instead. "You love us." 

- - - - -

2007

Nothing seemed to work.

Seungri wasn't blind. He was smart enough to see what was happening.

There was a segregation in the team. The hyungs, and the maknae line.

They were paired up for almost any event that required at least two members to attend or participated in.

People always tell him that they enjoyed seeing them together on tv. That they were hilarious. And Seungri couldn't deny them that fact. When he looked back at their performances and appearance on variety shows, their strong chemistry was undeniable. It looked so effortless on screen, how they would just joke back and forth, unscripted. Daesung hyung didn't even flinch and initiated most of the skinship effortlessly.

Yet no one knew of the awkward silence that was trapped in the back of the car on their way to the broadcast station. How Daesung hyung would immediately put on his headphone, closed his eyes, and transported himself to a whole new world where Seungri does not exists. And how Seungri would spend countless journeys back home just staring out the window, counting the number of red cars that would pass by them before the next traffic light stop (he's not the maknae for nothing).

It was the same thing back at the dorm. When the members are all together in the kitchen for dinner, or at the living room catching up on tv shows; Daesung might not be seated next to him or pull him in a headlock (not that he would want that to happen, he already has had enough of that from Jiyong and Big Seunghyun hyung), but he wouldn't ignore Seungri either.

"This girl is totally maknae's type." Daesung would comment off handedly while their eyes were all fixed on the actress.

"How would you know what my type is?" Seungri would challenge.

"If she's a female, she's your type," Daesung said. Seungri didn't turn to look at him, but he knew very well that Daesung was smirking.

Everyone else was too busy laughing to notice his attempt at an offended-looking face.

"Our Daesung is too funny!" Jiyong hyung snorted in between his laughs. He was practically crumpled on the floor. Seungri honestly thought he was over-exaggerating a bit. It wasn't that funny.

"Then your type must be 6 year old girls," Seungri blurted.

"That's stupid," Youngbae said, as he pulled Jiyong off the floor and back to the couch.

"No girl his age would want to play with Doraemon. Only six year olds!" Seungri insisted.

TOP shook his head and sighed dramatically before turning towards Daesung. "He really don't have good timing at all."

Daesung nodded. "Sorry Seunghyun-ah, I have to agree with Big Seunghyun for this one."

"What are you talking about? Hyung never agree with anything I said before."

Jiyong laughed while waving for him to come back and join them on the couch. Seungri wasn't sure how he had ended up in the middle of the living room, hands on his waist as if he was ready to give a lecture.

"That's not true maknae, our Daesungie agrees on a lot of the things you've said."

Perhaps Seungri was a little (okay a lot) taken aback by the comment, and Jiyong never did explain further, and he could tell the moment had passed and he didn't want to be blamed for having bad timing again in less than an hour, so he let it go.

The only space left was next to Daesung. He was also hugging the huge bowl of popcorn. Seungri decided that was incentive enough to park himself next to the guy who finds him uncomfortable. Maybe he would find him so uncomfortable that he would shut the hell up for the rest of the show. That would show him.

But five minutes had not even passed, before Daesung broke the silence again. "She's so full of aegyeo, she's totally your type."

This time, Seungri plunged his hand into the bowl without warning, causing Daesung to jump a little. He pulled back a fist full of butter popcorns. "You could have said that earlier."

Daesung laughed. "Eh, that's not fun at all."

- - -

Later, when everyone retreated back to their rooms, the same thing would happen. 

Daesung would not utter a single word. Not even a goodnight.

They would go about changing into their PJs, each taking a corner of their shared bedroom. Daesung would clear his throat every once in a while. Seungri couldn't tell if it was just to make up for the awkward silence hanging in the air, or if there was really something irritating his throat.

And then, because he's the maknae, Seungri would busy himself with nothing until Daesung had settled down on his side of the bed before Seungri would casually make his way to the light switch, turned off the lights, and d his way to his side of the bed.

And then Seungri would settle down in the darkness, back to his hyung, close his eyes, and listened to his hyung's hushed conversation with God.

It was his lullaby. But Daesung didn't have to know that.  

And this was their dance every night. 

----- 

tbc...