He sat there silencing everything around him so that his thoughts could be clear, all he heard was the ticking of his watch and his heartbeat which was pounding at an abnormal rate as he thought back to what had just happened that afternoon of his. He sat there smiling, worrying and praying. He was contented that he had a chance to at least tell her his feelings in front of her although she was in deep slumber. He was worrying about her health, her recovery, just her, his mind was all filled with thoughts of her, as he prayed, prayed sincerely that she’ll be blessed with health and happiness. He had been doing so ever since… forever.

His gaze traced up to the floor which had an illuminated room. His heart thumped as he recounted from the bottom of the building, the result it gave him calmed him down, if she’s awake, she should be alright, he told himself mentally. However, he didn’t know that in fact, Yoona was not alright; her heart was burning with curiosity and anxiety together, waiting for an answer. The ‘Im choding’ that everyone knew was non-existent, it seemed like she had finally become a lady. It was inevident to Ok Taecyeon though as he drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, still unable to let himself drive away, he wanted to stay in this area while his memories were still fresh.

[flashback]

After he had managed to tuck Yoona into bed, he quickly rushed into the bathroom to find her towel. These girls had made it easier for him to find their belongings, inside the bathroom all the things were organised neatly with initials written on certain belongings to differentiate if the patterns were similar. He rinsed out the towel with the initials YA sewed on the bottom corner and placed it gently on her forehead. Ensuring that she was in a comfortable enough position he checked her temperature, it seemed to stabilize a little, he took a sigh of relief. The afternoon sun beat onto his face and Yoona’s, scared that it will cause her a headache, he went over to close the curtains and sat back down, continuing to watch over her.

The silence and loneliness rang in his ears along with the constant tick-tock-tick-tock the clocks of the dormitory had.  He could not decide between staying and taking care of her or leaving her here and notify the SNSD members that they had arrived safely, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do that. Now that he had decided, part of him wanted to explore the wonder s of this heavenly apartment of the KPOP goddesses, but in the end he gave them their deserved privacy and just held onto the thought. As boredom slowly crept in on him, he had fiddled with his fingers, he had listened to his music, and then he felt the arrival of the first signs of fatigue.

Checking once more on Yoona’s temperature, he stood up with determination to do something useful with his time. Maybe he was doing this to compensate and lessen the guilt that he had placed Yoona in such a confused situation nearly a year ago. He was trying to put himself in her shoes, one minute he says that he loves her, the next, tabloids are filled with rumours that he is officially dating with SNSD Jessica, her own sister. Filling a glass of water placing it next to her bedside table, it pained him to hear her struggle with even just some peaceful sleep, her breathing seemed heavy and unstable, but it startled him when she mumbled

“I’m hungry” in her sleep, making him rush to the kitchen to cook something healthy for her. It seemed to him these girls were not taking the time to think about their own health and diet.

He hesitated at the point after taking a peek at the fridges that SNSD had which were covered in Polaroids and photographs that made him giggle at how cute they were. He had been taken aback with the amount of food and ingredients inside the fridge

“This is awesome, what happened to those rumours that they took enough calories for a meal during a whole day? So they were telling the truth…” he was going crazy with excitement that his speech was uncontrolled. He began texting tiffany, after locating all the contents of the cupboards,  telling her that he was going to use the ingredients in the fridge,  only getting the reply

Yah, I guess you realised you should after what you’ve done to Yoona, Ok Taecyeon, I won’t forgive you if you don’t take care of Yoona for me!!!

Fany

Yah Fany ah, you should at least have some trust in me, it’s not how you think it is , please trust me this time, give me some time, I’ll take care of Yoona, don’t worry

Taec Oppa

Although it was just two letters, it seemed as if he had received approval for something he was actually doing right when nearly the whole world was against him. ‘ok, sorry’ tiffany had replied.

As he was cooking, he was in such deep thought about how he would deal with his situation, he kept saying that he needed time, he needed trust, however even he himself was unsure when he could prove to everyone his feelings. All he could use now was his patience, only allowing him to wait, wait and wait. Because of not focusing when handling the pot, he had accidentally placed his hand at the brim of the pot which was sizzling hot. He yelped, the pain made him burst in a yell as the heat throbbed and all he could do was fan his own hand without any sense how to fix himself. His yell had in fact woken the sleeping patient that he was caring for. She rushed out from her room in her slippers,

“Taecyeon oppa, what’s wrong?” she said when she was the door, rubbing her eyes slightly feeling lightheaded still. She focused her vision and saw a 2pm ‘beast’ who was jumping up and down, shaking his hand, pointing at it with his other, face all red and trying to hold in his pain and not scream by inflating his cheeks. He was unable to speak, it was just nonverbal contact.  It was a cute and funny sight, but not at that moment for Yoona, she had completely forgotten of the condition that she was in, and had rushed forward and grabbed his hand. She pulled him over to the sink and turned the tap on at full speed, letting the water gush down on his hand. He could only watch her, as she dashed around searching for something,

“Stay there and don’t move your hand” she ordered him, he could only nod and continuing watching.

“Yoona, do you need help?” still in her weak state; she needed a second attempt to reach the cupboard above the stove, causing him to ask her.

“Just don’t move it,” as she returned to him with the ointment that she had successfully retrieved from the first aid box.

“Yoona, it’s alright, just a little…” but Yoona silenced him

“Let me look at it,” she said quietly turning the tap off and grabbing his hand so that she could examine it as she dabbed his hand gently with a tissue.

“It’s all red…what did you do?” she asked without looking at him, blowing onto his hand gently,

“it’s alright, I just…”

“Be more careful, please, and you say you were the one who was supposed to take care of me” she giggled to herself as she began to apply the ointment to his wounded skin.

“You can still joke?” Taecyeon couldn’t help but giggle as well

“Is it better now?” she looked up and saw that he was looking directly into her eyes, they were merely centimetres apart as Taecyeon tried to look at his hand as well. Yoona quickly let go of him, feeling her heartbeat once again go out of control. She pretended to be looking for some bandages at the bottom draw, when Taecyeon tried to thank her,

“Yoona, thank…” but before he could finish his sentence, Yoona had stood up too quickly and bumped her head on the cupboard door that she had left open before, he couldn’t believe her as he rushed up to rub her forehead, where she had hit herself.

“You, should really get some rest you know…” he continued to rub her forehead checking if a bruise was appearing.

“no, I want to help…” she replied, rubbing her own forehead as well

“look whose taking care of who now, I’m actually doing my job…” he .

“That means your hand is alright right?” as she began to bandage his hand finishing it off with a light slap.

“Ah!” he yelped, letting her to giggle around. She finally forgot about her emotional and physical stress for a few moments, it was because of him, it made her feel safe and secure, that he still loved her, but she treated it as only as an illusion.

“I’ll sit down and watch over you, before you get hurt again.”

“See who gets hurt first” he teased

“do you really want me to get hurt?” she teased back

“no, that’s not what I meant” Taecyeon took her words seriously

“my unnies would kill you.” She laughed

Not long after, Yoona just watched him continue on preparing in the kitchen, she felt as if they were a couple living together, yet it was only another temporary illusion that she saw. She had always envied Seohyun and Yonghwa to be able to live as a couple, she had always wanted to get a chance to get that feeling that someone else that you loved was preparing a meal for you. Usually it was the wife cooking for the husband, but she now she knew what Yonghwa meant on the show, how he loved that feeling. It was indescribable in a way with words. Maybe it was just a part of happiness.

She smiled at how focused he was when he was trying to prepare her meal, she thought that he had looked so charming when he was focusing on one thing. Maybe it was a weak spot for most girls. Without her knowing, she had slowly drifted off into sleep when she was gazing at him. Taecyeon only realised that she was not awake when he had finished with everything and had felt the light breeze come through with the drizzle.

He asked her “Yoona, I’ll close this window alright? It’s bad for your cold.” he looked back at the long silence and no reply. He smiled and shook his head

“Im Yoona, all snuggled up and warm inside on a rainy day, it’s one of the most comfortable things to do in life,” he was once again going crazy with a dose of love and what had happened just then, she was so worried about him, at that thought, his heart raced with time again as he picked her up bridal style and once again tucked her up in bed.

Suddenly looking at the photograph beside Yoona’s bed of Yoona and her SNSD sisters it reminded him of the mission he had to accomplish. He borrowed Yoona’s keys again and went down to his car to retrieve the gift that his friend had prepared for his love. Glad that Yoona was still asleep, he sneaked into Jessica and Sooyoung’s room and placed the box inside the drawer that had a photograph of Jessica and Krystal on it, leaving only a message with a sticky note that he had searched in Yoona’s room,

From: You know who<3

He left the room, having nothing to do once again, he saw the sunset as the clouds dispersed, it was a pity, and the view was nice from up here, if only she was awake to watch it with him. He sat down in Yoona’s room with the curtains drawn back to enjoy the breathtaking view. As the dark grew, he realised that the first star in the night sky was clearly evident from up here despite all the Seoul night lights. Seeing that Yoona would not wake up any sooner, he decided to have some fun with the sticky notes and wrote messages all over the things that he had prepared with sweet messages with instructions on it. Soon he entered Yoona’s room, confessed his feelings and gave her a kiss before leaving.

[end flashback]

Taecyeon reached into his jacket pocket for his car keys; instead he found a key chain with a ‘Y’ on it.

“When did I have this in my pocket?” he asked himself as he dangled the sparkling in front of him like a pendulum.  It reminded him of the stars up in Yoona’s room, maybe it was supposed to spell her name, like how he saw her name in the stars. Mesmerised and once again lost in his memories and thoughts, he started contemplating if he should return them and just leave. 

After a few minutes, he left his card and entered the cold ready to return her keys, with every step he took, the anxiety inside him grew, because he wanted to check on her.

****

Up in the SNSD apartments, Yoona had continued to pretend to be asleep as she felt the footsteps come closer, they were too gentle to be his, where the doubt in his presence multiplied inside her. As the visitor came closer, Yoona kept her eye shut, allowing her body to face the window and began to relax herself to make it believable. She felt a tap on her shoulder, gentle, caring, familiar.

“Yoona, look what you’ve gotten yourself into” the voice told her as she placed a hand on the forehead to check her temperature, Yoona opened her eyes at this familiar touch, slowly her relief spread across her pounding heart.

“unnie,” Yoona mumbled, surprised

“How did you? Omg how come?” she just managed to gasp

“Your manager felt guilty of not being able to take you back home and allowed me to come up here.”  Yoona’s own blood related sister smiled, as she received a tight embrace from her chin-dongsaeng.

“how are you feeling?”

“I feel way better than before…” she sighed “How’s everyone at home?”

“Don’t worry about them; they’re finer than you could be”

“I’m so sorry to everyone…” she muttered.

“Don’t be… it’s not your fault, you shouldn’t think about that, let’s forget about stuff like that, are you hungry? Have you had anything yet?”

“Now that I think about it, I’m pretty hungry, but nobody’s home yet.”

“Ok, I’ll cook something for you” as her sister left for the kitchen but she could only call Yoona out to see the sight for yourself.

“Yoona ah, come out here for a moment” as Yoona approached her she was only able to point at the prepared meal and drink that was left on the kitchen bench with sticky notes and instructions labelling each of them.

“Who did this?” Yoona tried to recall her memory of how did this happen, but gasped at how forgetful she was

“I thought it was part of my dream…” as she cleared out her thoughts, she remembered that she may have given away her feelings for him, but how did she get to the bed? Her heart and mind quivered with excitement the more she thought about it. Yoona’s sister was still waiting for an answer; luckily a phone call had saved Yoona from explaining.

She picked up the first sticky note on top of some oats

‘it’s good for you, but I don’t know if you should eat it at this time of the day, I don’t know if you even like it’

She continued to read another note on top of a covered bowl of porridge,

‘you better eat all of this, it burnt me’ it made Yoona giggle

Then there were ranges of foods for Yoona to choose, she was curious how he had managed to make it.

‘Revive and get well soon with this’ it read on a drink made from sweet potatoes and milk.

She took a sip from the cup. As it reached her tongue, she had confirmed that it was the best drink that she ever had in her memory. It was sweet from the inside. Yoona finally let a smile that came from the bottom of her heart illuminate her tired face.

Yoona’s sister returned from her phone call

“I hurried over here as soon as I got off work, but it looks like someone beat me to it.”

Yoona was lost for words, her sweet smile explained something that her sister knew meant that she had fallen into the trap of love.

“I don’t need to know who it is… just be careful, alright?”

“yes unnie, lets reheat this and eat it together, should be better than any take away you can get, especially when you’re sick” she smiled as she placed a reassuring arm on her sisters shoulder and led her to the dining table.