ALMOST WERE

Up until that day, I thought that the worst day of my life had been that time when Minah had ed me out at the rehearsal dinner for her wedding with Kyungsoo. 

Now, I was sure that the worst day of my life was going to be when I confronted Kyungsoo for the second time about how he was hanging out with Minah because it didn't take a genius to know that this wasn't going to end as adorable as it did the first time. 

Kyungsoo didn't expect a thing. 

Well, if he did, he was doing a lot better of a job hiding it than I was. When he'd first saw me, he'd asked me if I was okay because my face was contorted into something that was supposed to resemble a smile but obviously didn't. Although, in my defence, I was typically making a weird face and Kyungsoo always asked me if I was okay because I generally not an okay person because I constantly have a lot of emotions and, well, I'm just really weird. 

But that day was totally (obviously) different because I was about to bring up something that wouldn't have been addressed in the first place if it wasn't for how Krystal had opened her big mouth. 

Maybe that was the key to success - I should have called up Krystal and invited to go and get ice cream with us. 

Except that Krystal was sometimes The Enemy (I mean, she was related to Minah and they both caused a lot of drama last year. Krystal might still be convinced that I have a thing with Jongin and I don't think that that's legal) and she probably would have brought Jongin along and this was not supposed to be a bigger spectacle than it already was because I was already just about one hundred percent sure that I was going to cry. 

I shouldn't have even asked him to go for ice cream in the first place because now I was going to end up crying in a public place and that was basically what I was trying to avoid in my life. Why hadn't I been thinking? 

Oh, wait, that was because I had been hyperventilating into a paper bag instead. 

"So, what was it that you wanted to talk about?" Kyungsoo asked me as I watched my ice cream melt in its cone because I am a pathetic, spineless human. "Is it about how your brother is coming into town? Because I don't mind that, really." 

What? Really? Did he really think that this was about Luhan? I mean, yeah, I had stuff to say about that as well, but seriously? 

"No. I mean, yeah, that too, but no," I skillfully (not at all) dodged the bullet and then tried my hardest to think of a smooth transition into how Minah had spent the night at his apartment. Why couldn't I have known about that? Why didn't he invite me to that party? Yeah, I wouldn't have gone in the first place, but it's the offer that counts. 

"Then what is it?" Kyungsoo asked, happily his ice cream and not suspecting a thing. Meanwhile, I was sweating. I thought that I was going to pass out. I hadn't fainted out of nervousness in a while and that meant that it was long overdue. I should basically just accept it while I was still upright and conscious. 

I took a deep breath. It had to be obvious now. Like, there was no way that it wasn't obvious. I wondered if Kyungsoo was just playing dumb with me because he didn't want this conversation to happen. Maybe he thought that if he psyched me out enough then it wouldn't happen. That would've been a smart move on his behalf. I was still contemplating backing off and lying and saying that it was about Luhan after all. That actually seemed like a really good idea and I should- 

No, Avery, you needed to stop being such a little baby. People deserve to be called out for their mistakes. I only had one chance to get this right and I really, really didn't want to this up. 

"Why did you spend the night with Minah?" 

Squash. 

I'd thought that my eyes were closed when I said that, but they actually weren't. I was hoping that they would be closed because I didn't want to see Kyungsoo's reaction because I knew that the moment that I saw some sort of hesitation would be the moment that I caved and resorted to talking about the weather. 

But since I apparently couldn't even trust myself, I was left to watch Kyungsoo freeze mid ice-cream bite, which, in turn, made me freeze, which in turn, probably made all of the people that were walking by us very uncomfortable.

Except not really because no one was really paying any attention to us, but you know what I mean. It was weird. 

"I know that you spent the night with her," I carried on, my voice was getting stronger the longer that I spoke, Well, that was a new one! Was that what it felt like to be confident? Because I could definitely get used to that! "So there's really no point in you even denying it." 

Kyungsoo shifted his weight from one foot to the other and then back again. "Who told you that?" he asked me. He was trying hard to appear calm, but I knew that he was just as tense as I was. 

"No one," I lied. Really, Avery? No one told you? Why didn't you just blame it all on Casper the Friendly Ghost? That one would've at least been slightly more believable. 

Kyungsoo, unfortunately, didn't buy it. "Was it Jongin?" 

Of course, it was Jongin. Jongin was the only common link between Kyungsoo and I. Well, no, I guess that we had other mutual friends, but I highly doubted that any of our other mutual friends would've wanted to get involved in this. I didn't want to get involved with this and I was essentially one of the main characters. I really didn't have any other option. 

"It doesn't matter who it was," I told him. Even though I didn't necessarily like Jongin, I still didn't want to throw him under the bus. He'd get called out when the time was right. 

"Yes, it does." 

"No, it doesn't," I shook my head at him. "It doesn't matter. What matters is how you spent the night with another girl!" I was trying not to yell. Nothing good ever came out of yelling. Well - you know what, this conversation could have easily taken a ual turn, but I was not having any of that. This was an urgent situation and my fight-or-flight reflex was obviously failing me because I definitely chose 'flight' every opportunity that I could. When did I decide to become so bold? 

Oh, that's right. It was probably yesterday when I listened to every single one of my 'empowering' playlists in hope that I could absorb some power. 

And how was that working out for you, Avery? 

Kyungsoo's jaw dropped. He'd completely lost interest in his ice cream. Maybe I should've waited for him to finish eating before I had this discussion with him. Or it would have been better if we'd just never gotten ice cream in the first place because, let's b