Chen awoke to the sunrise and 11 faces contorted in mixtures of concern, anger, and hurt. The light pounded in the back of his head, but he managed to keep his eyes open in a squint as faded voices yelled out at him. “Jongdae!” “Get ahold of yourself!”

“Why do I feel like I was hit by a truck?” he groaned. It was at that point he finally noticed the metal globes like boxing gloves surrounding his hands. And feet. And the body-tight prison molded around his body. “And, uh…?” he asked, pulling against his restraints slightly.

Everyone around him, it felt like, continued to talk at once, until Suho finally raised a hand in the air, calling for silence.

“Jongdae. Do you remember how you got here? Everyone, give him some room to think,” he added as an afterthought, backing up a couple of paces himself.

“I remember… fighting. I was fighting… With Sehun… Fighting everyone else… And being afraid… So ing afraid- Oh God what the hell did I…” His voice trailed off into a whisper.

“Care to elaborate?” the question came, weakly, from an extremely exhausted and embittered-looking Sehun.

“Y-yeah…” he murmured distantly. “Yeah…”

“Sehun, I know you want answers. We all do. But we need to get out of here, get washed up, and get some food first or this will not end in a civil manner,” Lay spoke up, reminding them of the ‘Don’t discuss serious matters on an empty stomach’  rule that had been put in effect after a rather serious altercation involving Chanyeol, Xiumin, and a muffin.

“How? We can’t go home looking like this,” Baekhyun asked, raising a very good point.

Lay looked up toward a figure approaching from the distance. “We’re not going home.”

Kian’s 8-passenger SUV was an extremely tight squeeze with five extra (they’d attempted and failed to squish D.O. into the 6 inches of “trunk” space) but they managed to not only fit, but get back and into Kian’s apartment in exhausted and awkward silence, and without being noticed. That is, if you count being spotted by several people who then had their memories erased as “not being noticed”.

The gym of the apartment tower had showers for 6, and within 30 minutes all wounds had been bandaged and they all sat together snacking on some food that had been prepared by their somewhat begrudging host.

Chanyeol looked from where Kian, obviously annoyed, was trying to distance himself; Kris and Luhan were looking aloof; and Sehun sat shooting hurt looks at Chen, who was seated before the group, looking uncharacteristically somber for Kim Jongdae. “There are so many things wrong with this,” Chanyeol leaned over and murmured to Baekhyun, before closing his mouth tightly when he realized he’d spoken a bit too loudly and Lay was giving him a look.

“Let me say this before you say anything,” Lay started. “This wasn’t entirely your fault, and we’re not blaming you.” He heard the uncomfortable shifting of disagreement behind him, but no one spoke up, and he ignored it. “Your power buildup kept you from thinking rationally, but we want to know why you… why this is what happened in particular.”

It was a moment before Chen could open his mouth, and even then, he couldn’t bear to make eye contact with anyone.

“It… It started the night Sehun lost control of his powers. I mean, that’s when I started getting paranoid. I know now that it was irrational, and I can’t explain it, but I was just so scared it would happen again. I was scared next time someone wouldn’t make it.

“I don’t know if you guys remember the time Chanyeol and Baekhyun and I were refusing to practice, but a few days before that I’d begun studying mind control. It took a long time, and I had to have a willing person to practice on, so I got a girlfriend-”

“Wait,” D.O. interrupted, “You mean this whole time, you were seeing that girl so you could manipulate…” He was silenced with a hand from Kai.

“Nothing I can say can make this less vile, so I’m telling you the whole truth. Yes, I was taking advantage of a fan. And by the time the accident with Sehun happened, I was strong enough to be able to use it on him…”

“But why,” Sehun whispered, when Chen was silent for a moment. He knew the answer was coming, but the words rolled out of his mouth regardless.

The reason Chen had gone silent became apparent as his jaw shuddered open when he began to speak again. “I thought... if I could make you look like a threat… if I could get everyone to think you were dangerous, they would agree to… to… d-deal with you… T-t-then no one else w-would get h-h-hurt... ing hell, I tried to get you killed…” The horror that shot through him as he said the truth aloud was too much, and sobs began to wrack his body. With some hesitance, most of the members moved forward one by one to come closer in what could be perceived as the first act of forgiveness. The fact that the first was Sehun, tears beginning to overflow from his eyes as well as he wrapped his arms around his captor, caused Chen to cry even harder.

“You fought it, you know,” he said between sniffles and sobs. “I couldn’t get the programming to stick. Your will to keep everyone safe was so ing strong...”

Luhan, who was still seated in his distant corner of the room with Kris, had been planning on keeping his mouth closed, but that hadn’t always been his forte. “That doesn’t explain why you started attacking them, though,” he said, expressing his question as a comment.

“That’s where everything gets even blurrier.” By this point, Chen had stopped crying so hard, but tears still fell every time he blinked. “I was…  I was losing more of my sanity every moment, and I guess I lost it. I have you guys to thank for not giving up on me.”

“You should thank Lay for that,” Suho clarified. “He’s the one who orchestrated everything and never gave up on you or Sehun.” He made eye contact with the Chinese member, who returned his look with a humble, shy one.

“Oh, no, it’s no big deal-”

“Oh, c’mere!” Chanyeol shouted, grabbing a startled Lay by the hand and dragging him down until his arms wrapped around Chen and Sehun, who hugged him back tightly.

“No, no, this won’t do,” Baekhyun assessed. “D.O., Tao, on your feet.”

He didn’t give the only two members who hadn’t yet jumped down to comfort Chen a choice, as he took them both by the wrists and pulled them onto what was quickly turning into a love pile.

“Kris, Luhan?” Tao asked shyly.

The two ex-members looked at each other. Not like they would have been able to talk their way out of it; they knew by now that they could go willingly or be forced. Luhan shrugged cooly, and Kris sighed as they made their way over, but not without grabbing the arms of their old friend from their old world. For once in his life the intelligent young man was sputtering incoherently in protest, but he was ignored as the three were welcomed into the group with open arms.

“I don’t know how I could ask you guys to-”

“WE FORGIVE YOU!” a chorus of voices replied.

“Duh,” came the muffled voice of Sehun from somewhere down below.

“Yeah, you’re on probation and therefore required to come to every practice until further notice, but we totally forgive you,” Suho said, smiling at his own completely serious joke.

Chen looked around until he was able to make eye contact with Lay.

“You’ve totally got my back so that I never do this again, right?”

Looking around at what he could see of the members that had so quickly gone from unsure when Chen had begun explaining himself to completely accepting and loving by the end, he smiled back.

“Always. We all do.”