All I want to do is flop on bed and tackie the two hours of homework I have sitting in my backpack. The note attached to the fridge tells me what I expect. I’m on my own for dinner.

Oh well, looks like a tuna sandwich and chips. That’s fine with me. Homework is easy as usual, every school seems to teach the same exact things. I find it so boring. An hour into biology, my phone startles me, and I am relieved to see who’s calling. “Hey, Maj.” I say. “Tell me everything, how is it?” She ask. “Typical.” “Anyone cool?” “Not yet, we’ll see.” I mumble. “Don’t worry, I’ll be out for the Fourth of July. Did you know there is a huge letchon fest that weekend? It’s supposed to be pretty awesome. I read about it in the internet.” “How do you know more than I do?” I ask. The half an hour conversation ends when her favorite show is about to begin. “Talk to you later.” “Sure. I’ll call you in a few days with an update.” I promise her. “All right, hang in there.”

Maja has been my bestfriend for the last seven years in Cebu, it was hard to leave her. She is the one and only person who understand what I am going through. When my mother left, I stayed at her house for weeks. I couldn’t look at my father. I couldn’t look at the kitchen that we used to cook together. I couldn’t look at anything that reminded me of her. Maja, has been the only consistent person in my life, and no one else.

I really wasn’t looking forward to school the following morning, but I felt happy the day has ended. My homework is finished, when I realized it is already ten, and my father is still not home. He’s always worked late, even when my mom was around, but never this late. It wasn’t until recently that I discovered the lipstick stain on his collar. I figured he was probably dating someone, and not working to all hours of the night.

I wasn’t sure how I felt about that, my Dad dating someone other than my mother, but I guess I can’t blame him for moving on. She certainly did. It has only been six months since she left us, and neither one of us have a clue where she’d gone. It was odd, we lost complete contact with the little family that she has, it’s almost like she doesn’t want to be found.

If I ever see mom again, I don’t know what I will say or do. Right now, I hate her. My head and stomach ache just thinking about her. I know I have to switch gears if I don’t want to start crying, so I let my thoughts run back to Cebu and Maja. For some reason, Gerald keeps popping into my thoughts, my brain keeps bouncing back and forth, Maja, then Gerald, then Maja, then Gerald.

The old me, would have jumped at the chance to be with him, the new me, not so much. It’s my fault, I’ve become complete untrusting of people since she left, and I am afraid to get close to anyone. Andy, my boyfriend in Cebu, broke it off right after my mom left, because of that very reason. If he went out with his friends, or didn’t call, I accused him of things he probably never did. I can’t blame him for giving up, I even hated being around myself. Maja, was the only one, the only one I trusted with everything.