i have this song keep repeating on my mind...

lost stars...it brings memories back to me ..

we have a surging roaring career.

and the dream we have before was on our hands. i smile at that thought. i am enjoying. but theres always something i can't have...

that is you.

you and your sisters show was awesome. sorry i was too busy to be there. i envy some of our members though. and honestly i envy the people whom always around you id wish i was your managee instead. but yeah thats impossible. finally we got time at the backstage we've talked.

what are we? i was staring at you. you look around and lean to me. youre always like that and it just melts me. you said you miss me i was happy that my ears are clapping. but our little moment got interrupted and nothings come after that.

youre so happy to be the lead on your drama. i congratulate you. the eyes of yours are shining i dont know if its a tint of happiness or sadness. but still you are the prettiest star for me. we are busy and we cant even say hi and hello.. since your shoot is on a hectic. youre with one of the finest stars.

and i am so proud of you by that. you never fail to amaze me.

"yah llama! youre spacing out again! let's go have fun ara?" 

i was called out of my reverie. its one of this party nights.

get wasted and have fun. but its somehow hallow...and i know exactly why. youre never here. just so you know my happiness is different when i am with you, it satisfied me.

i tried to reach you again but you have things to do and it is a lot. when we see each other its either youre too tired or youre on a run. a simple take care and see you again was never came up. i just smile to show how supportive i am.

youre movie promotions are up. you became more busier.

i was busy..rather making myself busy.cant you see i wanted to make you jealous? i mingle almost with everyone giving sharing the hugs that was suppose to be only for you. i am desperate..no skinships for your sake  an order. acceptable.i am supportive remember? that it leaves me with a broken heart thats torned into pieces then slowly turn into a spec of dust.

life is really fair. i am alive but nearly dying. this piece of fantasy that turns into a hurtful reality. i shrug this distress and walk out. just be happy. that way i can survive.