I wrote this as a school assignment in the beginning of the school year where I had to take a picture and make a story out of it.
I used this picture and when you read, try to connect the setting to this one.

Confront the Past

        

            “I don’t have a disorder, or anything of the sort, Dr. Zhang.” The middle aged man with the impassive façade declares, staring indifferently at the metal name plate on the wooden desk. The solemn man has found himself accommodated in this leather seat every Monday for the last six months. He’s grown accustomed to the four sky blue walls that separate him from the outside world for an hour. He’s even used to the presence of the man in the white lab coat before him, but not a single aspect of his life has changed since their first consultation.

            “That may be true, Mr. Xiao, but I’ve heard from your employees that you work for days straight. Do you work yourself day and night in order to take your mind off of other stressful events? Perhaps to avoid thinking about what-”

            “I like to get my job done; it’s nothing out of the ordinary.” Lu Han promptly cuts Dr. Zhang off in a viciously cold voice.

            “I see…” The psychiatrist nods his head as he jots down a note on his paper.

            Patient avoids the topic, again.        

            “I have a meeting to attend to Dr. Zhang. Can’t you just say that I’m experiencing normal stress from work, prescribe me some sleeping pills, and let me be on my way?” Lu Han hastily states as he glances down at the silver wristwatch that adorns his left arm.

            “Mr. Xiao, this isn’t a simple case of stress that you have here, we both know that.” Dr. Zhang sighs. “Based on my observations from the last six months, I think you’re dealing with trauma from an event that happened years ago.” Instantly, the muscles in Lu Han’s body become tense as his already cold eyes turn into spheres of ice. Irrepressibly, his fingers tremble at his side and the first thing he does is desperately clutch onto the armrest of the chair. Soon, his fingertips turn a shade of pinkish white as his grip only tightens. Lu Han’s reaction doesn’t go unnoticed by his psychiatrist.

            “I don’t suffer from trauma.” Lu Han retorts, his words becoming terser, almost as if he’s struggling to speak.

            “I beg to differ, Mr. Xiao. Your past makes my diagnostic even more reasonable since you can’t recall what happened sixteen years ago. Possibly, the reason behind your memory loss is because you want to bury the traumatic event. Also, you continuously avoid any mention of the incident.” Lu Han has his mouth open, ready to interject; but Dr. Zhang’s glare told Lu Han to let him finish.  “Adding on to that, you keep your mind away from these thoughts by submerging yourself into your work, causing your trauma to bother you through the form of nightmares, which is what brought you to me.”

            “I really have to go Dr. Zhang; we’ll finish this session next week.” Lu Han rapidly jumps to his feet, prepared to escape the suffocating confinements of this room.

            “One more question,” Dr. Zhang sighs as he brings his pit black orbs to meet his patient’s. As soon as the question leaves the lips of Dr. Zhang, Lu Han’s body fails to run out of the doctor’s office as he had planned earlier. Instead, a sheer layer of perspiration forms on his brow as the question echoes inside his mind like a broken tape.

            “What do you fear the most, Lu Han?”

            What do you fear the most, Luhan? Is it the future… or the past…

* * * * *

            The echo of footsteps against the cement earth bounces off the stone walls that ominously tower on both sides of the lone alley. Silence seems to swallow the noise as a man clad in a well-fitted, silk suit comes to a halt. His sophisticated, aristocratic mien stands out like a diamond in dirt. What could a man of his stature be doing in such a gloomy setting? Slowly, his eyes scan the backstreet of the slum. Nothing much has changed since the last time he stepped foot here from what he could weakly recall. The moldy windows are now cracked or completely shattered from their frames. Sunlight barely cracks through the dense pollution of Beijing, illuminating the street, and dulling the daunting atmosphere that he faintly remembers from that morning long ago.

            Suddenly, his facial features contort to an expression of loathe as the pungent musk of eroding metals and animal waste cloud his nostrils. Doing his best to ignore the stench, his doe-like eyes fall upon a spot a few meters before him – a spot that he’s successfully eluded and forgotten until now. His slender fingers curl into fists, attempting to subdue the horrific memory that he had buried in the darkest corner of his mind. Although it’s to no use, a gust of biting cold air, along with a deafening agony in his skull, hurls him back to that wretched night sixteen years ago…

            Slam! The dark haired fifteen year old boy jumped at the unexpected crash of the warehouse’s door. He was already on the balls of his feet, ready to attack, when a familiar face came into view. A sense of relief cascaded over the boy. It was only Wu Yifan, the gang’s forerunner who had welcomed the younger boy with open arms the second he had saw him barefooted and bloody in the streets. Almost as soon as relief engulfed the fifteen year old, it diminished at the prospect of a dark scarlet stain on Yifan’s shirt.
“Lu Han, follow me.” The taciturn voice ricocheted off the walls of the barely furnished backroom. Without hesitation, Lu Han dashed after the leader.

            “What happened, Yifan?!” Lu Han frantically demanded from the older male, but only silence is given as a response. His eyes took another glance at the blood that tarnished Yifan’s top. He had a hunch on what happened; but he prayed that he was wrong. Lu Han shook his head before observing curiously as Yifan scrambled for the little of his belongings and stashed them into a black duffel bag. “Whattaya doing?” Lu Han asked. Yet again, he doesn’t receive an answer. Instead, his face is met by a duffel bag bloated with cash. Lu Han’s eyes widened and just as he was about to speak Yifan gave him a stern glare that commanded him to not ask any more questions.

            Without demur, Lu Han followed Yifan outside devoid of a single word being exchanged amongst the duo. They had been walking for what seemed like hours underneath the luminously lit moon and bitter squall of night. An expression of confusion fell across Lu Han’s face when Yifan came to an abrupt stop. Instantaneously, the young boy’s coffee irises took note of his surroundings. The alley was empty, not even a small dumpster was to be found, making the scene even more haunting. The thick blanket of fog that hovered just above the ground gave the place a mysterious essence. Ever so slowly, Lu Han turned his head to face the unsealed, foggy, and grimy windows of the warehouses that lined the old backstreet of the shantytown. Immediately, his nose crinkled with disgust once the heavy odor of urine and animal feces invaded his sense of smell.

            “What are we-” Lu Han gasped as the throbbing agony burns in his left cheek. His fingers fumbled to hold his own face as he tried to comprehend what just occurred. Quickly, his eyes darted up to his friend, questioning him with his stare. Oomph! Lu Han’s lean figure collapsed onto the damp pavement while his bare palms scraped against the jagged cement to catch himself. A painful hiss escaped his lips as he felt searing blood on his hands. Before he could even bring his eyes to look at Yifan, he felt the toe of a boot jeer into the side of his ribcage. Lu Han’s eyelids squeezed tightly shut as he sensed his mind starting to plunge back to the clutches of his morbid past…

            Lu Han had lied there, motionless, allowing the mammoth sized knuckles of the middle aged man come into contact with his gaunt physique. Habitually, Lu Han had clenched his jaw to strengthen himself against the blows, but the pain was all the same. He was too used to the aching discomfort that he had received daily from his father’s hands ever since his mother abandoned them…

             Lu Han wheezed for air as another clout was thrown at his vulnerable form, but this time the colossal fists were replaced with smaller and more hesitant ones. His body shuddered uncontrollably on the floor of the dark alley as Yifan continued to assault the boy. Cold sweat began to stream down Lu Han’s face as his breathing became shallow. Yifan glimpsed down at the fifteen year old boy, guilt and sympathy ate away at his heart when he saw the person he practically was a brother to lying helpless and broken on the ground. He didn’t want to do this, but in his mind, it was the only solution.

            It was dark outside, only the dimly lit street lamp at the end of the passage provided light. Yifan was relieved that he partially wasn’t able to see the sight before him, afraid that if he did, he might not have the valor to do what he was going to do next. Swiftly, quietness enveloped the alley, except for the soft, light breaths of Lu Han.
“Listen to me carefully, Lu Han. You’re smart enough to know why there’s blood on me, so I won’t explain. Just know this; I won’t bring your life farther down the wrong path than I already have.” Yifan paused as he wiped his teary eyes with the rough sleeve of his shirt. Lu Han still lay there, his body quivered even more than before as panic propelled throughout his veins.

            Not again… Not again, not this again…
“The money in the bag is for you to start a new life. Trust me; this is for your future.”

            No… No… No…

            Sluggishly, Lu Han’s eyes opened like a newborn child. The scene before him was heartbreaking and sent his body into a whole new panic. How the street lamp cast a glow upon the mist that began consuming Yifan’s eerie silhouette only emphasized how Lu Han’s only friend in this lonesome world was slipping from his grasp.

            Once again, he was wounded and abandoned…

* * * * *

            “Did you regain memory of what caused your trauma, Mr. Xiao?” Lu Han’s eyes flutter open at the sound of that voice. The baby blue walls and comforting sunshine that lightens the room catches him off guard. His mind is slightly lost at the moment, trying to remember where he’s at. It’s been a week since the last time he stepped foot inside this office and was advised to go back to that god forsaken alley.

            “Mr. Xiao?” Lu Han turns his head to face where the voice is coming from. Almost instantly, his recollection of the last sixteen years clicks into place like a jigsaw puzzle. From the time he woke up in the middle of an alley having no memory of his life, to when he graduated at the top of his class in college. From a couple years ago when he became the most successful CEO in China, to now where he was having a session with his psychiatrist. “Did you recall what caused your trauma after you visited the place you woke up at sixteen years ago?” The doctor interrogates.

            “Yes, I did.” Lu Han mumbles as he releases a long sigh. A satisfied smile appears on the psychiatrist’s face.

            “Good, this is the first step forward. You just had to confront the past.”

 

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