“It takes an awful lot of butterflies to make a world full of flowers and this collection called life is dedicated to the butterfly within us all...”


“Aigoo Ji Soo what are you doing here outside, it’s cold.” Ji Han, her brother, her only living family scolded her when he saw her sitting on a bench at the middle of their flower garden. Half of it was covered in snow.


“I was writing.” She smiled sweetly as he took off his suit and placed it around her. 


“What did you write about today?” He took a peek on her red journal.


“Spring?” He looked at her this time. Then smiled when she nodded happily.


“Spring. It will be here soon, once this winter is over.” She said and looks at the white scenery around her.


“De. Come now, you must not catch a cold.” He said and helped her stand up and led her inside their home.


“Mianhe. She insisted to wait for you outside. I can take her to her room.” Ji Soo’s personal caretaker offered but Han declined. 


“It’s okay Mai, can you just make sure the food is prepared right?” He asked her then continued to help his sister walk upstairs to her room when she nodded.


“Oppa?” Ji Soo opened her eyes and searched for him while she was lying down comfortably on her bed.


“I’m here sweetheart.” He edge away from the window and sat down at the chair beside her bed.


“Was work tiring today?” She asked and smiled when he took her hand and entwined it with his.


“De. But it’s all gone now since I’m home.” He assured her and fixed her blanket.


“Mianhe. You have to do things alone, I can’t even help.” She said, a streak of sadness evident in her eyes.


“Kwenchana. As long as your here with me, Oppa will be fine. Now, rest for a while before we eat our dinner okay?” 


“Okay.” She closed her eyes. Contented with her brother’s words. 


Han waited until her breathing evened, indicating that she has fallen asleep before letting the tears that was swelling in his eyes fall down silently down his cheeks.
Days like this were what he hated. He dislike it when she is sick but most importantly he hated the fact that he couldn’t do anything about it. No matter how hard he tries to take care of her.


“Angel, don’t leave me. Arajji?” He whispered in a low voice, hand still clutching hers. 

~~~*****~~~

“Aiyooo! Hyung wake up! Pali! Pali! We’re late!” Kyu jong shook his sleeping hyung not minding his protests.


“5 more minutes.” He replied and tugged his hoodie more lowly to keep the bright light away from his eyes.


“Youngsaeng hyung! We have a recording today!” He shook more fiercely this time while shouting.


“Bwoh?! Aisshh why are you waking me up just now?” Youngsaeng suddenly woke up and hurriedly went to change his clothes.


“Ke Ke. I overslept. Was playing with my computer till dawn.” Kyu jong sheepishly smiled and went back to the guest room to gather his things and shoved them inside his black bag.

---

“Ya! Kyu crashed into your place since we finished late last night but you’re still late?” Hyun joong teased the latecomers, referring to Kyu jong who was their walking alarm clock.


“Wae?~” Kyu jong whined and bowed politely to the staff who was inside the dressing room.


“Honey! You’re late!” Jungmin playfully hugged Youngsaeng.


“Why do I have to endure this torture every single morning when we have activities?” Youngsaeng gave out a loud sigh and sat down.


“Because I don’t want to hug a turtle, an Otter is more cute.” Jungmin said with a smirk and happily went to the cordi noona when she called him.


“Hyung, what day is today?” Hyung joon came in, fidgeting with his watch.


“The 23rd.” Youngsaeng replied then repeated the number silently in his head again.


“Time sure flies fast. Winter would be over in a couple of days. That means it would be a year now since she broke up with me.” He said to himself as he glanced at the window. Looking at the frost building on its corners. 


Just like the snow, his heart was now cold. Her career was more important. A petty reason to throw away his warm love before. Now for him, love was just nothing more than a temporary need of belongingness, it could never last.

~~~*****~~~

“Alright. Seems like our princess is in good shape today.” The doctor messed Ji Soo’s hair then faced her brother.


“How is it doc?” Han asked. He had taken the day off today since it was her sister’s check up today. It was twice a month, so he himself would not want to miss it.


“Better than expected. Seems like her body didn’t seem to mind moving from Taiwan to Seoul. Let her take the same medicines for two more weeks, if there’s improvement, I’ll take away some of it.” The doctor assured him with a smile.


“Oppa, look.” Ji Soo pointed to the Ferris wheel she saw outside from the window of the doctor’s clinic.


“What is it? Oh! Huge right?” Han patted her head and looked outside.


“De. I wonder what it feels to be on top.” She said with a musing face.


The doctor and Han’s expression changed into a knowing face. They knew how much she longed to be outdoors, interacting with people. It’s just that after that accident five years ago everything had changed. She could no longer stay outside for a long time. 

~~~*****~~~

“Youngsaeng-sshi be careful of singing your high parts, breath evenly or else your voice would float.” Their songnim said after the last round of vocal lessons. 


“De.” He answered. Gulping warm water from his bottle until it was half full.


“Hyung wanna come with us?” Kyu jong asked him as they were packing their bags.


“Where?” He asked without looking at him.


“Basketball.” He chuckled at his fellow members. They were itching to go play all week but they couldn’t because of recordings.


“Arasso. Since recording is done I guess we should go out and play.” He smiled at them as they did a victory dance.


“Was it that long since I went out with them?” He asked himself. Maybe. For a year now, he had been pretty engrossed in being alone from time to time.


“Then I’ll treat you guys for dinner. Noona want to join?” Hyun joong asked them.


“Next time boys. Teacher has a date with her husband.” She said and the boys while they were walking out of the studio.

~~~*****~~~

“Hyung joon what’s the rush?” Jungmin asked their youngest member and playfully blocked his pathway while they were fixing their things after their performance in Music Bank.


“Aissh! Ya! Mal! Move it. I’m late. I promised my cousins to eat dinner with them.” Hyung joong whined and pushed him aside.


“Cousins? Didn’t know you had one.” Hyun joong commented making everyone smile. 


“Who are these unlucky persons for having you as their relative?” Youngsaeng asked, bullying him. It was only in the presence of his fellow members, his brothers that he can be at ease.


“The ones who just arrived a week ago from Taiwan.” Hyung joon replied, not minding the remark as he was in a hurry to pack his bag.


“Oh! You mean the only relative you have from your mother’s side?” Kyu jong asked. Making certain that it was the one he mentioned some time ago.


“De. Have to go. Bye!” He replied and dashed off the dressing room and straight into his car with the help of their manager.


“Does he really have a relative?” Jungmin asked innocently making them laugh as they proceeded to pack their things.

~~~*****~~~

“Junnie is late.” Ji Soo leaned on the window frame with a pout on her lips.


“Be patient. He promised to eat dinner with us.” Her brother assured her then felt her forehead in case her fever was back again for the nth time.


“Junnie!!” She didn’t listen but jumped in the air. She would have dashed out of the door and into the driveway if only her personal caretaker didn’t stop her.


“Yo! My pretty cousin!” Hyung joon said with his bright smile and hugged her tightly before giving her a box wrapped in red paper.


“Yo! You’re looking old hyung.” Hyung joon greeted Han.


“I do feel old. It’s been years since I last see you. Now you’re all grown up.” Han replied and slap each other’s back.


“Komawo Junnie!” Ji Soo interrupted their talk as she opened her present and showed Han the small cake instead with a “Love J&J” written on top of it.


“Ei, Ji Soo and Ji Han?” Han asked to tease the two.


“Anni. That’s Ji Soo and Junnie, ne?” She said happily.


“De. Ya! Your Korean is so cute.” Hyung joon for her mispronunciations. Although they were the same age, he couldn’t help but treat her like a little sister.


“That’s what she get from refusing to learn properly, she keeps on learning English instead. Kaja. Let’s eat.” Han shook his head and led them to the table.


Dinner was fun even if it was just the three of them. They talk about what they have been doing lately, and about Hyung joon’s members since he was from an idol group. Of course, they decided to skip the sensitive parts of catching up; it was like a silent rule not to talk about that incident five years ago.

~~~*****~~~

“Mai, is Seoul beautiful?” Ji Soo asked her personal caretaker as she looked outside the window.


“Hmm...de. There are a lot of places in Seoul that are beautiful. Places like those you see in dramas. Breathtaking but within reach.” She replied and tucked her in since Han would be coming home late.


“I want to go and see.” She said with a pout.


“Then make sure to get well soon.” 


“I haven’t been well for five years.” Ji Soo said with a sigh and closed her eyes. Though it was still 8pm she felt so tired.


“Is she asleep already?” Han came in her room panting.


“You didn’t have to rush home. I told you that she’s fine, just a little tired.” Mai told him and took his things.


“Komawo. I just couldn’t sit still without confirming it with my own eyes.” Han said and went closer to her sister. True enough, she looked tired and more pale than usual. The sight of her gripped his heart.


“Oppa...I want to see Seoul.” Ji Soo said in a weak voice as she was too sleepy already but forced herself to not to.


“Sshh...go to sleep. We’ll talk about that next time.” Han silenced her and took the towel on her forehead to replace it with a new one.


Ji Soo closed her eyes with a heavy sigh. It was always next time, but that never happened.

~~~*****~~~

“Youngsaeng ah are you riding with us later the way to the victory party?” Hyun joong asked. They just finish their last activity for promotions this afternoon and they were having a party later tonight.


“Anni. I brought my car. I’ll just see you there since I need to drop by my place to change.” Youngsaeng said and fix his hair a bit before standing up.


“Seems like we have a gloomy turtle here.” Jungmin said pointing to their youngest member.


“Let him be. He seems to be like that since this morning.” Youngsaeng said. He was actually curious but he was not in the mood today. Especially when the date today signifies the day she left him.


“Ya! What’s wrong? Pali tell us.” Kyu jong asked him.


“My cousin called this morning. Said her sister ran away from home.” Hyung joon told Kyu jong and Jungmin since the others were not listening.


“The one you visited two days ago?” Jungmin asked.


“De. Kind of worried. She never does things like that before.” Hyung joon said with sigh.


“Do you have a picture? Maybe we can go around with our van before proceeding to the party.” Kyu jong asked. 


“I have but it was taken five years ago. She still looks like it but she has longer hair now.” Hyung joon opened his wallet and showed them the picture.


“Are you sure she is your cousin? She’s pretty.” Jungmin took the picture then felt a hand hit his head.


“Stop drooling over a girl. See you later.” Youngsaeng said and said their goodbyes to them.


“What’s up with him?” Jungmin said with a pout.


“Never mind. You guys were talking about looking for someone?” Hyun joong joined in their conversation.


“De. My cousin. Kang Ji Soo.” Hyung joon said and showed him the picture. He didn’t tell them though about her condition for some reason he couldn’t.