Hi diary..So apparently we're going to debut as "x.o." or something like that. Idk I fell asleep during the meeting again. Basically this training thing is killing me. If I don't debut in 100 days i'm going to take a right in front of the SM building and fly back to Canada with a ' you' banner hanging from the tail of the airplane that i'll hang personally myself. Yeah, okay, i'm being vulgar, I know. I need to take a chill pill, but being in my shoes isn't easy. I have to wake up super early, train till the universe falls apart, and I have to eat ty food most of the time.

I have to eat broiled chicken that tastes like paper with a side of 3 shreds of lettuce. "gotta keep my figure" them i'm a growing man. I WANT SOME REAL MEAT YOU RUDE S. My mom would beat the living out of me if she saw how I ate here, then she would burn the building down after seeing how crazy this place can be. I tell her it's chill. "Yeah we practice 3 hours a day and we eat really awesome expensive company dinners" blah-blah-blah.

Hahahahahahhaha, if she knew the truth....Lying comes so easy sometimes, it's bad I know, but what else can I do? I really want to do this.

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Okay. So apparently it's "EXO" not "X.O." and we all have super powers? Like i'm a dragon and I can fly. Also we all come from outerspace....I fell asleep again so I was really tempted to ask them if I signed up for the wrong contract and if we're actually a giant group that acts in block buster movies together because that actually sounds really badass...I wonder if we'd get to work with Michael Bay, thay guy loves explosions and stuff.

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Hi diary, sorry i've been neglecting you but I don't really do anything other than train anyway. Sadly i'm not part of a giant group that acts in block buster movies. I'm just a rapper with the strangest concept to debut EVER. and we're filming a bunch of teasers, but I haven't really been in any of them at all....but it's ok. neither has anyone else lol.

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I got to film my teaser today. All I did was walk up some stairs wearing a cosplay from bleach or some, and I closed my eyes and tried to look all powerful like I control the universe....So yeah, ok. Peace

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Wow I seriously never write in this. It's been like MONTHS. Forgot I even owned this until Kai grabbed it and tried to use it to level out the table in the kitchen. Ummm....so yeah. Everythings going okay I guess. I'm the leader of EXO-M and I have to act cool all the time. Except it's not an act because i'm awesome. I'm kind of worried though...don't know if I should talk about it...even thinking about it is a bit.... ah, it, if I don't tell my diary, who the hell else am I gonna tell? Basically....I don't know if this is what I want to do....or if I want to keep doing this for a long time. The fans are nice and cool...and I love it but...idk...there's a lot of factors that just aren't weighing out the cons. Ya know? I guess i'll keep you updated on my feels....

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I want to go to Canada.

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FML

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Everyone's so awkward what do I do? I can't even do anything....I should do something. I hate everything.

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Okay it's been a couple of months since i've wrote in this because i've been scared about anyone finding this. I've kept a lot inside but I really think that If I don't write anything down I'm going to lose my mind. . Someone's coming. I'll write in you when everyone's asleep. WE ONLY GET LIKE 4 HOURS OF SLEEP THESE DAYS >____< gdi Chanyeol and Baekhyun please go to sleep. ughhhh.