One out of Two | Chapter Eight

Jongin turned around and as expected, he saw Ari standing a few feet away from him.

She scoffed. “Dr. Jung? Really?”

Jongin pressed his lips into a firm line. “Can I help you?” He asked.

Ari stepped a bit closer, she grabbed a hold of his hand. “Have you forgotten about us?” She said softly. “All the times we spent together? You said you wanted to be with me forever.”

Jongin squirmed out of her touch. Little snippets of them ran through his mind, flashes of their happiness lingered in the back of his head as he turned away.

“My dating ban is lifted…and so is yours.” Ari said.

He looked up. “So?”

Ari furrowed her brows in disbelief. “S-So?”

Jongin walked past her. “What does your lifted dating ban have to do with me?”

She turned around. “I know you still love me Jongin; you’ve said it a million times.”

Jongin turned around. “I refuse to love a girl who broke my heart in the past.” He said. “I refuse to love a girl who broke up with me because she was afraid of what the media would think. In short…I…Sorry, I can’t…okay?”

Ari stepped forward then stopped herself. “I-I know things about you that you wouldn’t want the world to know.”

Jongin waved his hand in the air as he walked away. “So do I.”

“I broke up with you for the sake of your success…I wanted us to grow with our careers so we could be together again without anything trying to stop us.”  Ari said. “I loved you…and I still do.”

Jongin turned around. “Ari…let’s stop.” He whispered. “Just stop…okay?”

***

His face flushed red as he walked into the practice room. Jongin closed the door behind him and pulled his phone out. “Hana.” He whispered. “H-Hana.”

Sehun walked in with his headphones in his ear, he had a frown on his face as well. He stumbled to the side when he suddenly noticed Jongin’s presence. “A-Ah.”

Jongin looked up and put his phone away. “S-Sehun.”

Sehun raised an eyebrow. “Why are you so…red?”

Jongin touched his face and looked away. “It’s nothing.” He whispered.

The younger grabbed his arm. “Hyung.” Sehun said. “You don’t look well…at all. Should I call noona?” he asked referring to Hana.

Jongin shook his head. “No…please…don’t.”

Sehun stood there dumbfounded as Jongin walked off.  “Why’s everyone so mean to me?” He mumbled as he stuck his headphones back on.

Suho looked up when the maknae walked into the dorm, his annoyed face contorted with exhaustion. He looked around the living room and counted five people including himself. “Where’s Jongin?”

Sehun huffed and puffed as he threw his phone down. “At the practice room, stupid hyung.” He muttered.

The leader stood up with his eyes wide, Sehun was rarely mad. “Whoa, what happened?”

“Manager said I needed more practice or else my collaboration stage at the concert wouldn’t look nice, so when I asked Jongin to practice he just blew me off.” Sehun said. “I was most excited for our collaboration stage but it might become another ‘Kai’ solo.” The younger mumbled in disappointment.

Suho sighed and patted Sehun’s shoulder as he eyed Chanyeol, hoping the happy virus would cheer the sullen boy up.

The manager was startled to see Suho at the company this late. “Joonmyun?”

Suho bowed. “Hey, um…I have to uh…I forgot something.” The leader stumbled across his words as he ran up the stairs.

He found Jongin on the floor of their practice room, the music blasted nonstop even if he wasn’t doing anything.

“Jongin.” Suho called his name as he turned the music down. “You should’ve called if you were going to stay this late.”

“I did.” Jongin said softly. “Two minutes ago.”

Suho rolled his eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing…I just need to think about a few things.”

Suho took a seat next to him. “And that is?”

Jongin shook his head. “It’s nothing…really.”

“Sehun said you blew him off when he asked to practice, you …you said no to dance. That never happens, so something must be wrong.”

“I saw Ari today.” Jongin said. “A couple hours ago…”

“Where’d you see her?” Suho asked. “Why did you see her? Only we use this practice room and there are three separate recording studios.”

“She saw me with Hana…and said a few things about getting back together. And it brought me back to the time when I was hurting because of her.” Jongin whispered.

Suho nodded along.

“I loved her hyung, I loved her to death but…when she broke up with me, and all of my confidence broke with my heart as well. And when she said those things, about us…about the past, it just…it brought me back to the time when I was depressed and heartbroken about her.”

“Do you still like her?”

Jongin shrugged. “I…There was a time when I loved her more than anything.” He said. “But that was years ago. If I think about loving her now, I feel like I could…I feel like we could work out again but, the pain and tears she gave me scarred my heart. So when I see her, I see both the happiness and the pain.” Jongin said.

Suho nodded. “I see…You could choose to love her again but every time you see her you will also be reminded of the long period of time you were broken.”

“I never got over her hyung; I just learned how to live without her.” He whispered.

Suho patted his back. “So what is it going to be? Are you going to get together with Ari again?”

“She said she broke up with me for the sake of my future…” Jongin said. “And it makes me wonder, what would’ve happened if she didn’t? Would things have turned out a bit differently?”

Suho looked at him. “Jongin…if Ari never broke up with you, you would’ve never told your parents about your dreams and ambitions, they would’ve never known you wanted to perform and dance.” He said.

“So?”

“That means you never would’ve met Hana…”

Jongin stared at Suho, he didn’t understand.

“Ari was the only reason why you debuted. She convinced you to tell your parents the truth, and kept pushing you because she knew how badly you wanted this. If she didn’t, I would’ve never stood on the same stage as you because your parents would’ve taken you back from the company.” Suho said. “You would’ve never become what you are today if you didn’t fall in love with Ari and it’s true that she broke up with you in the nastiest way possible, but things happen for a reason. And at the end, because you didn’t have Ari, you bottled up your feelings until you ended up in the hospital where you met Hana.”

“Why are you dragging Hana into this?” Jongin whispered.

“Because you like her. Hana didn’t replace Ari; she didn’t become your new ‘Ari’. She’s a doctor, you spent a lot more time with her because you never thought you’d fall in love with her, but you did…because she tended not only you, but that scar Ari left.” Suho said. “You loved Ari alright, but was it true love? Or were you blinded because she was your first girlfriend? Love is not about who you were with the longest, but who stayed by your side when they needed you most. You fell in love with Ari’s beauty and the way she treated you… As for Hana, you fell in love with Hana.”

Jongin looked at his feet and tapped his fingers against his knees.

“You’re silent now because you’re afraid to admit that it’s true; that the years you spent with Ari didn’t mean as much as the months you’ve spent with Hana.”

“Hyung…if you love two people…who would you pick?” Jongin asked.

“Are you between Hana and Ari?”

Jongin glanced at his hyung in silence.

“I’d pick the second person.”

“A-Ari?” Jongin stammered.

“If you love two people at the same time, pick the second…because if you truly loved the first, the second person wouldn’t matter.”  Suho said. He patted his back. “Don’t come home too late.” He said before leaving.

Jongin stood up a few minutes later. “Hana.” He whispered. “Jung Hana.” He said softly.

“I like Hana…” He said as he walked out of the practice room. “Hana Jung.”