Chapter 10

Maybe it is the way Kyungsoo was brought up that he is like this. His parents taught him how to be independent and he has never felt loved by them. His other siblings are all too busy with their own lives to mind his so he has always dealt with his own stuff by himself. In his little family, everything has to be ing perfect and it makes him feel sick to the core, to be really honest, because nothing in this world is perfect. He wishes that his family is different. He is sick of how much of a perfectionist everyone is, in his family.

Sometimes, he feels like he is the black sheep among his siblings. All of them are smart and good at what they do while Kyungsoo has never known what he wants to do as his career. The only reason he takes psychology as his major is because he has always thought that it is easy credit. So far he is right but now, he is facing his greatest challenge; Kim Jongin.

The thing is, psychology is easy credit in theory but when it comes to practical, he realises that he is bad at it. He is not exactly a social person so he is not used to talking to strangers or making them open up to him. It is safe to say that he spends most of his time keeping to himself. However, ever since he has met Jongin/Kai, he realises that he has done everything he could to get that guy to open up to him and yet to no avail. It is either he is unfit to become a counsellor(not that he wants to be one. He would rather be a probation officer instead) or Jongin/Kai is one hell of a stubborn person.

As Kyungsoo walks up the steps to the house before him, he feels his steps getting slower. He dreads seeing his patient again especially after he had snapped at Kai yesterday. He feels a tad bit guilty for it but he decides that he is not going to apologise for it. He refuses to do that because he feels like Kai deserved it. But maybe he was too harsh on his patient yesterday. Kyungsoo shakes his thoughts off, not wanting to hurt his brain by thinking too much about useless stuff.

Taking in a deep breath, Kyungsoo finally rings the doorbell. Not long after, the door swings open and he expects to see Baekhyun again but much to his surprise, it is Jongdae, his celebrity crush, who opens the door. The singer's face brightens at the sight of Kyungsoo and the university student cannot help but feel flattered. "Come on in," Jongdae invites and Kyungsoo takes off his shoes before entering.

Jongdae makes Kyungsoo sit down for a moment before disappearing into the kitchen. He soon comes back with a glass of orange juice in his hand. He places the glass on the table in front of the psychology major and smiles. "Have a drink before you go upstairs. I know how much of a pain in the  Jongin can be, sometimes," he says lightly.

Kyungsoo offers the singer a polite smile before sipping some of the orange juice. He feels a little bit uncomfortable and nervous about being in the same location as his favourite singer with no one else but them. It feels weird but strangely good at the same time.

"So how's your progress with Jongin?" Jongdae asks casually, his beautiful smile never leaving his face.

The psychology major just shrugs helplessly, causing laughter to burst out of Jongdae's kitten-like lips. "What's so funny?" Kyungsoo asks back at him, feeling a little bit annoyed. He secretly loves how lively Jongdae's laughter is, though. The guy seems so happy and carefree, unlike Kai.

"I'm sorry," the singer apologises with a sheepish smile on his lips as soon as his laughter has subsided. "It's just that... I know that Kai doesn't open up to people easily and you're just so cute when you shrugged earlier, almost like you've lost all hope." Kyungsoo still does not get what is so funny about that, though, but he does not say anything.

"Don't lose hope yet," Jongdae says softly and Kyungsoo merely nods in response. Deep down, he knows that his situation is really hopeless.

He finishes his orange juice before heading upstairs. He has a feeling that today will just be another fruitless session. Kyungsoo realises that he is actually comfortable enough with Jongin/Kai until he does not bother to knock and wait to enter his room. Instead, he just barges in before closing the door behind him. His patient does not even mind. Well, at least, Kai has never mentioned that it bothers him so Kyungsoo figures out that it is okay to do that. He takes a seat, as usual, on the armchair near Jongin/Kai's bed.

"What would you do if I kiss you?" his patient asks abruptly after a few minutes since Kyungsoo entered.

The sudden question takes the university student by surprise because he did not see that coming. He raises his eyebrow skeptically at Kai, not bothering to provide an answer, thinking that the guy is just playing with him, like always.

"Have I ever told you that you have nice lips?" Kai goes on. "Your lips are heart-shaped and from the first time since I saw you that day in the hospital, I wonder how your lips taste like."

"Really? You wondered about that while you had your tongue deep in the male nurse's throat?" Kyungsoo replies in a cynical tone, unable to believe what this guy is saying. God, he swears that Kai is doing this on purpose; trying to distract him so he would not be able to ask more about what happened when he was twelve.

Kai just shrugs in a nonchalant manner that infuriates Kyungsoo but the latter has decided that he is not going to lose his temper today. Sometimes, he thinks that he should take up Zitao's suggestion to go for an anger management course. That way, he will be able to control his anger better. But then, Do Kyungsoo is a stubborn little piece of so he refuses to do that.

"Answer my question, please," Kai requests in a surprisingly civil manner.

Kyungsoo snorts to himself at that. He rolls his eyes in annoyance and this time, he has failed to control himself. "Why the hell should I answer your dumb question when you don't even bother to answer mine?" he retorts in dissatisfaction.

"What question?" Kai asks, tilting his head to the side, causing Kyungsoo to feel really exasperated. God, he is so ing exhausted right now. Why, out of all people, does it have to be him to deal with this frustrating guy who does not know his limits?

"What happened when you were twelve, Kai?" he repeats the question that he asked the day before.

Kai blinks for a moment before nodding thoughtfully to himself. "Oh, I see," he murmurs. Then, a playful smirk forms on his lips. "If you answer my question, I'll answer yours."

"Forget it," the psychology major scoffs. "I've already given up hope on graduating. Let me just be the black sheep of the family."

At that, Kai's smirk disappears and instead, a blank mask replaces it. "I'm serious," he says almost earnestly.

Kyungsoo shoots his patient a dubious look but Kai just shrugs as if to say that it is up to him whether he wants to believe him or not. The university student lets out a small sigh. He does not know why he lets Kai treat him this way, to be completely honest. "I'll punch you if you ever do that," he answers bluntly, instead.

A hint of amusement appears in Kai's eyes before it is gone when Kyungsoo asks in an impatient tone, "So, what happened?"

A pregnant pause ensues. Seconds tick by and Kyungsoo is getting more and more impatient. He wants to press on this subject further but he forces himself to keep his mouth shut. He emits a soft sigh when Jongin still does not say anything. Kyungsoo snorts. What did he expect? Kai will always be Kai. Maybe, he really will not be able to graduate, after all. He has worked his off for years and this is what he gets.

Or maybe not.

"I was forced to watch each time my own uncle my brother," Jongin answers, his voice barely above a whisper. Then, he turns his body around, indicating that the conversation is over.

The two of them spend the rest of the day in silence while guilt eats its way down to Kyungsoo's heart.

Sorry for the really late update! I was busy and will continue to be busy tbh.