Reading over the contents of the notebook, I felt my eyes water. Because it had been apparent the whole time, but I still hadn't seen it. And everything was explained now. The first few lines...

"Minhee,

Today I wander in my memory... I can't stop thinking about you. And all of my thoughts are driving me crazy so I decide to write them out for you, even if you can't read them or hear them for that matter. Yet I still write. If it weren't for my family I could be with you...

I really miss you...and I hear you've been missing me too."

My heart pounded as I flipped a few pages quickly, reading once again.

"I feel like I've betrayed you, Minhee. Like I've abandoned you. And maybe you feel like I've done that too. So I'm not sure if you'll ever forgive me. Everything I've had to do up until now is unforgivable. And yet you grieved because of me. I always hated being the reason for your suffering."

I shook my head as if he could see me, as if I could actually tell him it wasn't true. Because I never felt abandoned by you Yesung, because I was still living in my memories. I took a deep breath, taking the small notebook with me and sitting down against the bed on the floor. Another page...

"Abogee scolded me again for wanting to see you as Jongwoon. He said that for the family I had to leave everything behind. Everything. But I can't seem to leave you behind. And I miss Kyuhyun too. Maybe you two are going to be happily together in the future. He'll give you everything I couldn't. Because I knew that he had feelings for you.

I'm a bad friend aren't I? Because I still went after you even when I knew he liked you? I'll bet he hates me somewhat, that he's glad I'm gone. God, I deserve all this that's happening to me. But still, I hope you are getting over me and moving on.

But then again I'm hoping you keep loving me..."

I squeezed the notebook close to my chest for a moment. So Yesung knew... He knew about Kyuhyun before I did. I couldn't even see it. Without another thought I continued. I wondered when I would see him again and actually see him as Yesung. I knew that Jongwoon was too similar... My fingers led themselves to another page in the notebook that was written with sloppy letters. Probably in a hurry.

"God, Minhee, why?! Why did you do that? The hug, the contact, I could barely take it. . This is too hard. I just wanted to hold you as myself for a while, but you didn't know Jongwoon. So Jaejoong had to intervene like that. I see you've gotten to know him a bit... I'm really jealous right now. Damn it, Minhee. I love you, but neither I nor Jongwoon can be with you..."

Before I was able to read the next sentence I heard the door open and someone stepped in. Oh God, what do I do? I shut the notebook quietly before noticing something fall out... A picture...of Yesung and me...together at the park on Valentine's Day. Tears threatened to spill but I held them in because I missed him so much. And I knew that someone who had stepped in could only be him. He would only keep this notebook in a room that was his own. I was frozen in place for a second before I gave up and rose slowly...

Things should have been clear to me before. That I had been right the whole time. Yesung had been expecting to leave me. And his parents had expected him to disappear. Jaejoong knew the history of their family, the way they worked. There were too many instances where I suspected something was wrong. And when I met his brother for the first time, I should have known that it wasn't really his brother. It was him.

Because he never did die. And all of the things that I had believed in up until then were a handful of lies. The man standing before me was no twin, no replica. He was none other than the Yesung I loved. My Yesung, only in disguise.

He froze when he spotted me. And I could tell that he was unsure of what to do. Whether or not to continue with the charade he had playing out, or to go back to being the man that I had fallen in love with. And after a few deep breaths, he had decided. I could see it in his eyes.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, in barely a whisper.

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PREVIEW OF FIRST CHAPTER:

"We'll always be together." he whispered, almost as if he was reassuring himself. I couldn't understand at the time what it had implied. Sure, Yesung and I had had our share of dificult situations, but it was nothing we couldn't handle if we had each other. However, later those words would come back to haunt me.

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"Minhee please..." My Umma begged me. I had locked the door of my room, with me inside. I didn't want to see anyone. Only Yesung. But I couldn't. And I knew better than all of this, but I didn't feel like being mature at all. Not now, anyways.

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And then I noticed. In a corner of the room. The far left side. The only ones who weren't crying...Yesung's parents? Not possible. I must've seen wrong.

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