“Is there a reason the two of you were so late?”

Zitao looks away from the green scenery as they rode and toward his fellow hunter friend.

“Pardon?”

Jongdae huffs and glances at Yifan far up in the front, leading them through the forest. “We waited for like two hours before you guys actually came. “
“I fell asleep,” Zitao quickly lies, swallowing hard when Jongdae observes him carefully.

“For two hours?”
“Yes, I didn’t get any sleep before because of my dreams.”
“Uh huh...” Jongdae sits up correctly on Minseok’s back, smirking when his friend flusters. “Right, all you did was sleep.”
“Shut up, Jongdae,” Zitao warns.

“I mean, a lot of people call it ‘sleeping’ nowa days.”
“Jongdae, I swear to everything holy, I do NOT want to be talking about this,” Zitao hisses harshly, sending his friend a dark glare. Jongdae erupts into a giggle fit but all together lets the subject drop.

Zitao doesn’t regret what Yifan and he had done but he wasn’t exactly feeling clean about it. He tries to convince himself that if he went back, he’d not do it at all. But he knows that’s not true. He knows that he enjoyed every single moment of it and that’s what bothers him so much. He shouldn’t be thinking like this, wanting even more than before. He should be going back to hating the man and just blaming it all on sudden rush of lust; but that’s all it is and nothing can convince him otherwise.

~~~

Zitao watches as he ties up his own boot, not wanting to look up at the leader on the other side of the room. He knows if he looked at Yifan, everything would just come flooding back. He doesn’t want to regret.

Its a few minutes untill one of them speaks up, “So what was this?” Yifan finally says in almost a whisper. Zitao reminds silent untill he finishes his boot and stands up to smooth down his shirt. He grabs his cloak and looks over at Yifan, “Lust, Yifan. That’s all it was.”

Yifan crosses his arms and slowly nods, “But what about love?”

Zitao scoffs as he ties his cloak around his shoulders, “Love? Why bring up love?!” Zitao crosses his arms as well, “I’m your prisoner, Yifan. You said you take what you want and isn’t that what you wanted? Adding in love will just complicate things because once I figure this all out, I’m leaving weather you like it or not. Thus, I’ll forget about you.”
Yifan looks to the floor and nods again, a tight smile playing at his lips. Zitao flinches a bit at how the leader looks uncharacteristically wounded, hurt, or possibly even sad.

“Yes, of course,” Yifan responds softly, grabbing the jacket Zitao had placed out for him earlier and heads for the door, “We should...get going, then. I think we kept the others long enough,” Yifan pauses briefly, “The sooner we figure this all out the better.”
Zitao watches as Yifan disappears past the fur drapes, leaving Zitao to clench at his chest, where his heart hurt and somehow ached.

Somehow, this would be easier for both of them. Without feelings to complicate things, he could have an easier time in leaving.

It’s better like this.

They both understand that.

~~~

“We’ll set up camp here.” Yifan’s voice brings Zitao back form the memory, causing him to shake his head and hop off Chanyeol’s back. He gives the wolf a gentle pat and a smile before helping them unload their bedding supplies.

In the middle of the night, Zitao finds himself shivering even despite the warm fire in the middle of the camp site. He brings his knees up to his chest, sticking his hands out to warm his hands with the warmth. He pulls his knees up against his chest and stares at the crackling fire. Zitao looks around at all the sleeping boys; some sleeping in their wolf form, snuggling the others so they’d stay warm. He honestly thinks it’s precious the way Luhan and Minseok were as wolves with Chanyeol and Kyungsoo cuddled up against their sides. It gives Zitao a better idea of just how close the boys really were.

His own brothers were like that too. Sehun and Jongin would sleep with Zitao in the winters, Zitao swearing they’d freeze to death or something; though Yixing and Joonmyun kept reminding him that that was impossible unless they lived in the west, the boys still didn’t even hesitate to hug Zitao tightly from each side as they slept under his red, heavy covers. If there were two people he couldn’t live without, it’d be those boys.

“Do you think of them often?” Zitao looks up through the fire to see Yifan staring at him through the flames. “Yes, I do...I miss them more than anything.” Zitao whispers softly, unintentionally sounding miserable. Yifan is slow to respond but eventually nods his head, remaining silent.

Zitao lets himself admire the leader’s handsome features once again. Maybe he used to hate the man but he can’t say Yifan is ugly. He’s the opposite, in fact. He’s actually one of the beautiful people Zitao as ever seen; so beautiful, it was practically inhuman.

“Yifan-ge?” Zitao uses the name unintentionally, but doesn’t bother to fix his mistake. Plus, Yifan didn’t seem to mind. He actually seems nicer if Zitao used the honorifics.

“Yes? Zitao?”

Zitao remains silent for a few moments.

“Where is your family?”

Yifan lets out a long sigh while he lies on his back with his arms behind his head. Zitao scoots closer, hoping he’d say at least something. Yifan is the most reserved of the group and it absolutely makes Zitao go crazy; he learned about how all the boys were orphans, but he’s still yet to find out about Yifan.

“I don’t know.” Yifan replies quietly. Zitao can see him staring up at the sky. He moves closer until he’s right beside him. “What do you mean?”

Yifan turns his head to watch Zitao carefully; perhaps searching for something in his dark eyes. His head falls back down on his hands.

“I was born in the northern east, raised by my mother until I was 6. She died giving birth to my little brother,” Yifan says, gaining Zitao’s immediate attention. “You have a little brother?”

“He didn’t survive either.” Yifan murmurs and Zitao immediately regrets the question. “I’m so sorry, I...” Yifan shakes his head and continues, “A family friend named Siwon raised me. He taught me how to effectively use my wolf and power. Everything was as it should have been.” Zitao smiles when he sees the happiness glint in Yifan’s eyes.

“Siwon fell in love, though. He fell for another wolf. I think his name started with an ‘H’ but I didn’t pay attention.” Yifan chuckles with a hint of bitterness.

“When I turned 10, I told Siwon to go and be with the man he loved. He fought me about it but I convinced him to go so I grew up in the wilderness...that’s where I found the boys. I found Kyungsoo first, then Chanyeol, then Luhan. Minseok came later when he aided Chanyeol during a fight with some hunters. It’s why Chanyeol was so afraid of you.”

“Because I’m a hunter and they almost killed him?” Yifan nods.

Zitao stares at Yifan with admiration, lying on his stomach with his elbows on the ground and his chin in his hands. “You took care of four other boys when you were only 10?”

“I had the help of Luhan and Minseok, but mainly yes.”

“You must really be strong, Duizhang.” Zitaos murmurs softly, Yifan turns his head to look over at him. The hunter finally, for the first time, gives Yifan an affectionate smile. Yifan’s expression turns soft at the rare event.

 “You don’t usually smile like that,” Yifan grins, “At least not around me.”

“You’ve never given me much reason to.”

There’s a brief silence.

“I know. I’m sorry for treating you so harshly, but you did try to cut my throat.”

Why does he apologize so easily?

It makes Zitao think though: if he were honestly in Yifan’s place, he’d be like this too. Doing what he has to protect his family. In some cases, he’s just like Joonmyun.

Perhaps I had been too harsh? Maybe I should try to get off his case a bit...

“Good point,” Zitao says, pouting in defeat. He rolls over to lie on his back beside Yifan, resting his hands on his stomach.

“In all fairness, though, you’re keeping my prisoner.”

“You had chances to leave. I made sure of it.”

Zitao turns to his side and adjusts himself onto his elbow. “You gave me chances to escape?” Yifan’s smile turns into a sly smirk.

“Oh, you know you had the chances. All those nights I left you unguarded and untied? Or during the ride to the eastern cave? You chose to stay.”

“Yifan-ge...you...?” Zitao can’t look away even as Yifan stands up and stretches. He heads over to where his own resting spot is, “Get some sleep. We’ll have to leave before sunrise,” He says with a yawn before lying on the pelt and turning his back toward the hunter.

Zitao is slow in his movements toward his bed, turning his back toward the fire once comfortable on top of his cloak.

Yifan wasn’t stupid and he wasn’t underestimating me. He was trying to hint for me to escape. Then why the hell didn’t he just leave me at the wolf camp?

So maybe it was ME underestimating HIM.

And just like that, Zitao feels like a complete and utter .

Zitao groans and shivers at the cold air, grabbing the edge of the cloak and rolling so he became completely wrapped in it. He pulls his feet up and closes his eyes tight, his mind whirling around with confusing thoughts.

The dreams, the voices...and now Yifan is added to that list. It seems whenever Zitao thinks he knows Yifan’s personality or sees his real self, he completely chances. One day he’ll push around Zitao, shove him against a few walls or deny him meals.

And then the next day, Yifan would have fresh food beside his bed before the crack of dawn, make sure he had enough blankets, or he’d even pass Zitao small smiles before continuing on with his work.

Zitao whines lowly and curls up in a ball when the wind becomes stronger. He wraps his arms around his knees, burying his head in them.

Why does everything feel like a dream? What if it is? When I wake up, will I be safe and sound at home in bed with my brothers?

Zitao was about to scoot closer to the flames when a sudden warmth settles behind him, blocking off the source of the heavy wind. Something heavy curls around Zitao’s body in a protective-like position. Zitao turns himself over to face the creature behind him. No, not a creature or a beast; its Yifan’s wolf.

Zitao is reluctant but the cold urges him to scoot closer. He shifts his head up slightly so he can lock gazes with the wolf beside him, sharing a silent agreement. After a long stare, the wolf lowers his head to the ground just above the Hunter’s head, closing his eyes for sleep.

Zitao finally follows suite and rests his body into the warm and safe embrace of Yifan.

Zitao decides that Wu Yi Fan is the most frustrating man in the whole damn world.

And he might be alright with that.

Zitao wakes up to an unfamiliar material under his left cheek. Someone’s arm is rested on his waist, fiddling with the hem of Zitao’s shirt. When the person shifts around, Zitao opens his eyes, easily adjusting to the golden and orange rays of the on coming sunrise.

“Are you awake?” Someone whispers in Zitao’s ear and he smiles, nodding slowly. He looks up and meets the stare of Yifan.

“Duizhang.” Zitao breaths out, his fingers tightens around the leader’s shirt. “Oh...did I sleep in your spot...?” Zitao quickly sits up and looks around; confused when he sees it’s not in fact Yifan’s spot.

“Other way around.” Yifan responds simply, seemingly unfazed by this all. “You were cold last night...I forgot you’re not used to the outside temperature at night.” Zitao slowly nods his head.

“Back to hating me, then?” Yifan asks in a whisper. Zitao may be over-reaching, but he swore there was a hint of pain in his voice.

Zitao shakes his head quickly. He finally realizes Yifan’s hand is still on his waist. “No...I suppose I can’t...” Zitao can’t think properly with Yifan’s intense gaze on his lips and his hand tight on the hunter’s hip. Yifan’s brows are drawn together in what perhaps is confusion.

“Yifan?” Zitao asks with his voice a bit hoarse from slumber. Yifan leans down closer to the boy’s face, moving his hand up to cup Zitao’s cheek. Zitao didn’t exactly know what to do so he just stays still, keeping his fingers tight against the leader’s shirt.

Complications.

Zitao leans his head back on the ground when Yifan pushes him back and hovers over him, their lips moving together in a warm and comfortable rhythm. Yifan’s hands move up and down Zitao’s sides gently, letting the hunter wraps his arms loosely around the leader’s neck.

Yifan slowly Zitao’s lips but he decides to play hard to get. Yifan growls at this before biting down roughly on Zitao’s bottom lip causing the boy beneath him to gasp in surprise. Yifan takes this opportunity to slide his tongue in the warm cavern, exploring thoroughly.

These movements last a few minutes; Yifan’s arms on each side of Zitao’s head, his head dipped down against the boy’s now swollen lips. Zitao didn’t know what came over him or what he was thinking, but he ended up lifting his head slightly, following Yifan’s movement.

Zitao lets out a groan when Yifan slowly pulls back just slightly so their noses are still brushing together; both trying to catch their breath. Zitao finally pulls away, turning his face away.

“Yifan, please don’t make things complicated...” Zitao says in a whisper, trying to look away from Yifan’s hungry stare. The leader makes a low noise, seeming to hold back from doing SOMETHING. Zitao doesn’t know what this is, what it means, or what’s going to happen but he honestly can’t help himself inwardly groan again when he watches Yifan’s as he descends to wake the others.

We can’t be doing things like this.

Zitao and Yifan often shoot each other glances when they help the other boys strap on blankets over their backs; even as Zitao helps Kyungsoo when asked to help him buckle things into place.

“What happened between Yifan and you?” Kyungsoo asks in an echoed voice and Zitao tries to act calm.

“Nothing. We just talked a bit last night.”

“Yesterday, Yifan wouldn’t even speak or look at you. Now he keeps throwing you school-boy glances,” Kyungsoo hints knowingly, snickering even when Zitao nudges at the wolves side with his elbow.

“Nothing happened.” Zitao repeats.

“Did you guys kiss? Or perhaps more . . . ?”  Kyungsoo hints once again in an amused tone.

“Kyungsoo!” He screeches, gaining the other boy’s attention. He blushes wildly and covers his face, groaning.

“Don’t ask things like that! It’s embarrassing!” Zitao whines softly, so the others wouldn’t hear. Yifan stares at him with a smirk before turning back around and helping Chanyeol.

Zitao sends Kyungsoo a death glare and a small ‘Don’t you dare say a word or I’ll skin you into a blanket.’ Kyungsoo rather liked the insult, finding it creative. Zitao rolls his eyes, making his way over to Minseok. He lets out a long sigh, petting Minseok’s orange fur and helping his buckles as well. Once finished, the baby-faced wolf lowers down slightly so Zitao can hop up onto his back.

“I heard what Kyungsoo said,” Minseok whispers as best he could to Zitao, who just shakes his head and smiles. He pets through Minseok’s fur affectionately. Luckily, the baby-faced wolf was kind enough to not say a word.

Zitao cringes when they passed Kyungsoo and heard his deep-throaty laugh.

All of this is just adding to Zitao’s confusion. Now he wonders why the hell Yifan tried to let him escape, or even being nice to him.

But today, he now wondered what the hell the kiss meant for him. He wonders what it meant for himself, what it meant for Yifan, and what it meant for their future relationship.

It’s not supposed to get complicated. The kiss was just what Yifan wanted. Yifan wants, Yifan take and I’m fine with that.

True, he could go back to hating the leader; ignore him and pretend he doesn’t exist. But...

Yifan could have just killed Zitao.

Yifan could have left him in that forest to either starve to death or find his way back home.

Yifan didn’t have to take this trip to the mountains or keep Zitao warm from the harsh cold of the night.

This great wolf leader named Yifan didn’t have to acknowledge Zitao’s petty little human existence.

And yet he did. He did and he so openly had showed his affection, regardless of the possibility that this petty human could have slit his throat.

Zitao had even gone as far as rejecting him but he still treats Zitao all the same, if not better.

No, Zitao didn’t think it fair if he were to deny Yifan’s presence. Because then that would have made him much more barbaric and uncivil, as if he were a beast himself.

And that is exactly what he grew up to hate.

--------------------------------------------

A small but important chapters.

is getting complicated now, man. Even if Zitao wants to deny it.