Happy Birthday to Me

BGM : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qaWySb6Dbzc

Have you ever felt lonely even with all the people around you?

That’s what he’s feeling right at the moment.

“Happy birthday to you… happy birthday to Jung Yonghwa! Happy birthday to you!” The crowd went crazy with screams, hooting and loud applause as Jung Yonghwa blew his candles before raising his champagne on the 2^nd floor, leaning on the glass pane observing the crowd in attendance of his birthday celebration.

This is his birthday party all right. His ‘amusement park’ like happy birthday. How pathetic, he groaned to himself.. his eyes were blurry as he shouted “Cheers!” bumping his champagne glass with the people around him creating a loud ‘clank’ sound.

“Cheers to living a new life and to new meetings!” Joon shouted to his dear friend Jung Yonghwa before throwing his arms around Yonghwa shoulder, squeezing him in absolute happiness.

‘New life? New meetings? Pfft.’ He cursed to himself. We toasted for our cackling youth? What a joke. It should be.. “Let’s drink and die!””

He used to find clubbing to be a very boring activity, he rather slept and composed at his room rather than drowned himself in this loud music. He finished his champagne in one shot, throwing it on the floor. The sound of the broken glass can’t be heard, not when the music is super loud like this.

He used to find his home as a sacred place where no random people should touch it, but now he lets all these random famous peeps filled his place up with their presence just to erase the emptiness of his home. Just to erase the thought of how empty he had felt.

The right word that should be used to describe him now was ‘pathetic’.

A ‘pathetic’ man, with a flashy grin plastered on his face pretending that all is fine when he felt with a deep longing of true happiness in his heart shouting his joy over this amazing birthday party bash that he is having right now.

Tell him? Could he be even more pathetic than this?

“Let’s drink!” He shouted again, grabbing some random people champagne and drowned himself in the addiction of forgetting, addiction of a temporary happiness.

‘Yes, let’s drink until my tears are dry!’

He tried to stable his step when a woman clings on him, muttering some ‘cheap’ words that make him feel like puking but he stayed and listened. Listening on how important can she made him feel. He lazily glanced to the crowds surrounding him, will they be gone when his fame is gone too? He doesn’t mind it though, before he might be but now. Nahh, it’s normal.

Those naivety are better kept in the closet, this is the reality. This is the real world.

They kiss his just to get in the spotlight.

Those hungry young rookies that doesn’t know how damning this situation can be if they keep choosing the wrong path that you keep pushing and ignoring things when you wanted to grab your ‘high and mighty’ ambitions just to fall down alone into the misery hole.

People will start to cheer for your fallen grace instead of ‘you standing on the top’ cheers.

He pushed the girl away when he felt she was trying to force herself on him. He snickered disgustingly when he felt she was trying to cling herself again on him.

He massaged his head to stop it from hurting as he felt his sight becoming more blurry than before but still he moved his body to the rhythm of the song playing and then people started to try to dance with him.

He just let them be. But then they tried to touch his well tone body, he tried to endure it by dancing more crazily to the music.

He closed his eyes, grooving along with the crowd.. with his limited dance move when he felt an intense pair of eyes were trying to penetrate into his soul. It was hers..

Seo Joohyun.

He gasped. She’s back? He stopped moving, the blurriness that he once felt was now gone as he engaged in their eye staring contest. He can’t breathe so he loosened up a few of his upper shirt buttons when he felt she was moving towards him.

She wasn’t dancing along, she are just walking. Her eyes twinkled in sadness as she looked over him.

His hands formed into a fist feeling his blood boiling of how sympathetic he must seemed to her to look at him like that.

He closed his eyes once, when the figure of hers disappear into the thin air. He messed his hair frustratingly. She was just an illusion to a once happiness he once had, after all. He decided to go to his rooftop to get some much needed air instead, feeling sick over his own behavior.

He watched the stars above him, as they twinkled brightly colouring the dark night sky with their alluding happiness.

“Happy birthday to me.” He mumbled, sadly standing on the edge of the rooftop.

He felt the refreshing sound of the wind gushing through his body, as he looked over the enchanting view of Seoul. He felt like he was standing on the edge of the cliff, if he stepped one more step ahead he can really fall.

“You can just let it out you know..” A sudden melodious sound was colouring his dull eardrums with her soothing voice. He felt a sudden urge to scream, trying to let out his buried feelings burdening himself with every step he took so he screamed. He screamed until his voice turned hoarse.. and he screamed again..

“ARGHHHH!” He stomped his feet angrily.

“ARGHH!” He put both of his hands on his mouth as he tried to convey his feelings to the sky. He panted, as his eyes were flaming with anger as he looked at the sky.

“Are you okay now?” The same voice asked him, extinguishing his burning flame then only he realized it.. it was her voice.

“Seo Joohyun?” He turned his head and tried to search for the source of the familiar voice.

“Please take a step back oppa, I’m afraid you might fall.” She was hugging herself as she huffed, a ‘white smoke’ like breathing, clearly cold.

“Why not? I felt like I’m standing on the cliff nowadays so I better step onto one don’t you think?”

“What nonsense are you saying?” He could hear the displeasing tone on him that she was using now as her eyebrows were furrowed.

“Are you real, Seo Joohyun?”

“I am. Of course I am.” Seohyun answered his question weird out by his abnormal question when suddenly he almost loss his balance, the latter quickly ran despite wearing high heels to pull him from the dangerous place.

“What are you thinking?” Seohyun shook his lifeless drunken body trying to get his soul back.

How could she? When he has sold his soul to the success he now has. How could she make his heart beat when she stole it away from him years ago?

 “What are you thinking to be exact?” He pointed his forefinger at her. “Did you think I’m going to kill myself?” He pointed it back to himself. She nodded reluctantly to his question and he just chuckled amusingly.

“It’s not funny.” She mumbled irritatingly.

He curved into a gentle smile over a sudden warmness that was felt on his entire body when he saw how she still flared her nose as a reddish pink colour was seen on her cheeks.

“You look pretty by the way.” Yonghwa said nonchalantly.

“Thank you.” She replied back, embarrassed over his sudden compliment. “You too, look handsome.”

“So you’ve been checking me out don’t you? How? Did I manage to get into your heart?” Yonghwa looked at her grinning foolishly.

“You did that long ago.” Seohyun mumbled incoherently. “Aren’t you going back to the party?” Seohyun asked Yonghwa who was wrapping her body, covering her bare shoulders with his grey coat slightly brushing their cheek together sending tingling sensations all over her body.

“How can I, when it’s so hard to meet you nowadays.” He whispered huskily, tempting her heart to beat wildly.

“It’s you, that is hard to…”

“I miss you, badly.” Yonghwa interrupted, stopping her sentence midway. His tone felt melancholic somehow.

“I miss you too.” Seohyun said slowly as if every word was easily broken if not said carefully.

“So how are you?”

“Typical, working..”

“You?”

“…” Yonghwa bitted his lips trying to avoid her gaze.

“Miserable.”

“Me too.”

“Waeyoo?”

“Are you fine now oppa?” Seohyun ignored his question and replaced it with her own. It was cleared that she doesn’t feel like answering his question so he doesn’t feel the need to push her further into answering it.

“Well now you are here..” He smiled teasingly, showing off his crook teeth. “Wait, how did you come in?”

“Well, I can always get in… in any party. Just showed them my face then there you go ‘you can come in Seohyun sshi’”

“That makes sense but why are you here?”

“Why do you have lots of questions?”

“Because I want to make sure that you are really here.”

“I’m here for you.” She said, breathlessly. “Happy birthday Yonghwa oppa.” Her eyes were gazing onto him softly. He felt a sudden urge to feel her body enveloping him into an absolute warmness. “Honestly, I was tricked to come here by Changmin oppa.” Yonghwa raised his eyebrows at her sudden revelation. Seohyun bits her lips anxiously as she touched her own hair nervously. "He said you are on a suicide mission."

“Why do you even care if I’m on a suicide mission?”

“How can’t I? When you still possess this.” Seohyun grabbed his hand and placed his palm on her heart, feeling how her heart was drumming wildly. It was sending his stomach into somersault.

“What are you trying to say?”

“You still don’t get it?”

“I have lots of girlfriends, Seo Joohyun. This is inappropriate.”

“Lots are the really inappropriate one oppa. Are you serious with them then?”

“I’m not.” He retracted his hand from hers.

“I already talked to them, that I really love you. So, it’s not a problem.” Yonghwa stood there frozen with what she was saying to him. “I thought I was the only one miserable enough, not able to move on. When I saw you just now at the dance floor. I’m sure of what I’m going to do.. because you seemed as sad as I am.”

“You are there? You are really there?” Yonghwa asked, ignoring how desperate he is sounding right now. She nodded in response as she adjusted his coat on her.

“There might be a possibility for us after all. It’s embarrassing but it’s the least I can do as a last effort, at least I try. If before you tried to win me, not it’s my turn.”

“Seo Joohyun..”

“I will give you time, if you feel the way I’m still feeling then find me and I will give you, your birthday present.” Seohyun leaned in and planted a kiss on his right cheek, leaving Yonghwa there alone as he stared longingly at her disappearing back.

Yonghwa went back to his party, glancing absent mindedly at the crowd sitting along with Heechul who was long gone by now. He saw Seohyun, trying to excuse herself but relented to stay there for a while after some much needed coaxing by her group of celebrity friends. She danced around but kept her guard up and preserved herself from some hungry predator as she kept on sticking herself with Min or Hyoyeon.

She’s still the same smart girl.

He was watching her intently when suddenly she noticed how his eyes were on her, so she flashed a sweet smile at him as she raised her hand trying to show some gestures to say that she was going back. She dismissed the guy at her side trying to talk to her.

Somehow, his heart started hammering like it wanted to get out from his chest so he gulped the beer in front of him as he tried to focus his gaze at his glass of beer instead.

He looked at his wrist watch, it’s been 30 minutes since she left. He looked at his dreadful looking dongsaengs as he sat with them when. A girl came and cupped his face leaning for a kiss. Yonghwa closed his eyes becoming a willing participant trying to get rid of Seohyun image on his mind.

“I saw Seohyun.” Jonghyun ignored the girl and said what he needed to say. “Do you think you can get rid of her using that girl?”

“Do you want to go back to my room?”

“No.” Yonghwa groaned as he pushed the girl away from him. “Stop behaving like this. Don’t you feel sad for your parents?” The girl eyes widen, embarrassed by his words.

“So?” Yonghwa ate the chips on the table.

“You’re not going to hold onto her before she runs away again?” Yonghwa chose to ignore his dongsaeng question and continue eating the chips.

“Why aren’t you drinking?” Jonghyun asked yet again.

“I need to be sober to be able to think.”

“Drink then. Drink to your heart contents then. At least, you will be true to your heart. I’m tired of seeing you like this, you look like a zombie. A super bratty rockstar who kept on whining despite knowing the thing you needed to be happy.” Jonghyun stood up, leaving the other two maknaes stunt over his rash words usage towards their leader.

“What do you know!?”

“What do I know!? Guess what Jung Yonghwa sshi, I lost my hyung!” Jonghyun screamed back at Yonghwa.

“I’m here aren’t I?” Yonghwa asked, slightly stammering at his dongsaeng frustration. They were in the center of attentions now.

“Look at the mirror hyung. You are the epitome of lifeless. You wrote lyrics about death!”

“You insolent kid!” Yonghwa directed a punch of Jonghyun face which was stopped by Jonghyun hand as he grabbed Yonghwa fist and glared at his hyung.

“I have right hyung! I have right! Because you are a lost cause now, you kept on weeping on your life while you can always take a step back and correct the road you are taking now. You reach the top and what do you expect?! Tadaa it’s empty, then take a step back and observe what you have loss!”

“Can i?”

“You can.” Jonghyun gripped on Yonghwa fist loosened. “She came right? You guys can start anew again, even though the last one is a bit an insane ride. But its worth it right?”

***

Yonghwa rubbed his eyes groggily as he surveyed his surroundings. It was a white room with light yellow curtain and spacey enough to know that it’s quite expensive. He started to sniff around when he smell the sweet smell of a hangover soup coming from outside of the door. He decided to drift back into the dreamland only to have some sticky moisture felt on his face. His eyelids fluttered as he tried to wipe off the liquid only feel a soft thing on his palm… He tried to shake his head when he saw a white puppy.

A really fluffy white puppy. He gasped and took a look around the room.

This was not his room alright, his room was a golden room with flashy furniture. He felt the absence of his shirt as he roamed his hand through his body…

What happened?! He silently panicked trying to withhold a scream. He pulled in the blanket to cover his bare torso when he heard a creaking sound. The door was opening…

He gulped the lump on his throat, hugging the blanket as the white puppy ran towards the door.

“Aigoo uri dubu.” Seohyun said, her face was bare from any make up as she held a tray with a bowl of hangover soup on it.

“Phew.. thank goodness it was you.”

“What?! You are thankful for interrupting me.”

“Well, nothing happen right?”

“I’m not sure…” Seohyun eyed his body teasingly.

“Yaaa!” Yonghwa shrieked.

“Haha, oppa you are being such a girl right now.” Seohyun put the soup at her bedside.

“Tell me Seo Joohyun what really happen? Did I do something to you? No right.. you seem fine.”

“I’m not sure…” Seohyun pondered, hugging her Dubu.

“What do you mean?”

“Well if you called stripping yourself down as nothing happen then, suit yourself.” Seohyun said flatly.

“I stripped?” Yonghwa asked, his mouth slightly agape. “Did you look at my.. uhmm.?” Yonghwa asked interlacing his fingers together… awkwardly shy.

“Your six packs?”

“You saw it?!”

“Well it was nothing..”

“What do you mean nothing?!”

“I saw some six abs before too. So yeah..” Seohyun took a spoonful of the soup and blew the soup trying to cool the soup up.

“Wow.. Seo Joohyun. Just WOW.” Yonghwa said disbelievingly.

“Well I grow up.”

“Not when there’s a keroro plushy over there.” Yonghwa said smugly as he pointed at her Keroro at her bedside.

“Said the Simpson maniac.” Seohyun flared her nose as she tried to get Yonghwa to open his mouth to feed him the soup.

“It’s quite good, since when you’re a great cook?”

“Since I have some boyfriend over.” Seohyun smiled.

“What?”

“Just joking oppa, stop taking things seriously can’t you?”

“So what happen?”

“Well you come over last night… “

Yonghwa leaned on the door, drunkenly as he kept on knocking it. It took a while for the door to open. The owner was slightly surprised by his presence, as she struggled to express it through words. He stared at Seohyun who clearly just finished showering, her hair was still wet sending a wave of strawberry scent on his nose. She was wearing a plain oversized black LA Dodgers t-shirt with her pink pants still manage to look exceptionally beautiful as her natural beauty was shining through.

“What are you doing here oppa?” She asked. Her dubu was running to the door, greeting his presence on her house door.

“I love you so bad you know.. I need you to make me happy again. Can you give back the soul that I have sold?” Seohyun was about to say something when suddenly the leader of the rock band body fell on top of her as she tried to stable herself by grabbing the side of her door to avoid her body crashing down to the floor. He tried to stand up again, only to start vomiting on the floor.

“Not just the floor, you should look at my t-shirt!” Seohyun pointed at her black t-shirt on the bedroom floor.

“Mian.. So this is your room?”

“Yep.”

“O-okay. Well, why don’t you bring me to some other room?”

“It was dusty.”

“Liar, you wanted me on your bed right?” Yonghwa wiggled his eyebrows teasingly.

“Y-You CHODING!” Seohyun shoved a spoonful of soup to his mouth before slamming the bowl of soup on the table, wanting to go out from the room.

“Where are you going?” Yonghwa grabbed her wrist strongly, not letting the girl tried to wriggle herself out from him.

“Away from you.”

“You’re not going anywhere until you take responsibility.”

“For what?!”

“For seeing me .”

Seohyun was turning into red tomato by now as her cheek was flushed red by his teasing.

“You need to take responsibility by bringing me unconsciously to your bed.” Seohyun was about to argue when they heard a clicking sound from the main door.

“They come…” Seohyun muttered.

“Who come?”

“Seohyun ahhh, where are you?!” Simultaneous screaming from her unniedul was heard downstairs.

“What should I do?!” Seohyun was jumping in panic by now.

“Find me my shirt first!” Yonghwa jumped out from the bed, and darted his gaze everywhere on the room.

“My oh myyyy.. This is a guy shirt!” Taeyeon screamed downstairs as she gathered the girls to the 2^nd floor.

“What the hell?!” Yuri pointed at the two figure in the bedroom.

“Annyeong..” Yonghwa put on her oversized pink t-shirt as he bits his lips in panic greeting her SNSD members with Seohyun standing beside him.

“He’s a bit drunk last night..” Seohyun tried to stop her unniedul when she saw her Tiffany unnie was choosing an item on the room to throw at Jung Yonghwa.

“Drunk doesn’t justify you to sleep on our baby bed!”

“I can explain..” Yonghwa rubbed both of his hand trying to explain.

“Kill him!” They screamed as they ran towards Jung Yonghwa.

“Seo Joohyun, do something!” He screamed for help as he was busy running and jumping from all the sofas and small tables that was on his route to escape.

“Unniedul stop! It’s my fault after all.”

“What do you mean maknae?” Sunny stopped running and asked the maknae.

“I mean, I’m the one that see him and bring him to my room. So I should take the responsibility.”

“Yes, she should marry me.” Yonghwa chimed in only to be glared by her members.

“But… Seo Joohyun!” Yoona protested.

“I’m not a baby anymore.” Seohyun argued. “You guys did this before too, bringing some of your guy friend home because they are drunk. Don’t act all ignorant on me unniedul.” They stayed silent, glowering to themselves.

“But he’s a drunkard now!”

“Hey!” Yonghwa defensively shouted. “I’m drunk for your maknae…”

“Yaaa.. No cheesy pick up lines.” Sooyoung groaned in annoyance.

“And no PDA’s” Jessica chimed in.

“Maknae, you better explain.. and Jung Yonghwa get that alcohol smell out of our nose. Go shower or something.”

With this kind of screaming from her SNSD members, his soon to be sister in law.. he doubted he can afford at all to be lonely. No, to be exact… achieving a sense of peacefulness.

Author's Note

Do leave some feedback. I'm not sure, since i finished this in one go. -______-